


Unplanned

by 1MissMolly



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond - All Media Types
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Family Dynamics, M/M, Secrets, Spy story too, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-18
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2020-09-06 23:42:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 58,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20299894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1MissMolly/pseuds/1MissMolly
Summary: “Pray, tell me why you have chosen to include me in your deception?” Mycroft said coldly.“I will not deceive our family. I will tell Mummy and Daddy, but . . .” Benjamin hesitated and licked his lips again. “Even if I leave, the fact that I was the Quartermaster of MI6 places my child’s life in jeopardy.”“You wish to give it up for adoption?” Mycroft asked softly, feeling his brother’s pain for the first time.“No. I need to make sure no one will think to look for us. No one would come after us.”“You want to die?” Mycroft said.“Yes. Benjamin Holmes needs to die.”Someone is tracking down and killing the Quartermasters of the various security agencies around the world and Q just learned he is pregnant. He doesn't trust anyone, including the father of his child, James Bond.





	1. Chapter one

June 2019

The young man sat in the lawn chair under the hanging boughs of chestnut tree. The dappled sunlight carpeted the lawn around him. Alcott Benjamin Winston Holmes looked up into the green leafy branches and squinted his eyes. The sunlight felt warm and pleasant, especially after such a cold wet winter and spring. This was the first day in several, he had been able to sit in the garden that surrounded the little cottage. He breathed in the sweet air and the warm scent of damp earth. He smiled. Benjamin wondered how long it had been since he had smiled. It had to have been awhile. It must have been just after James left for his last mission. That was months ago. Benjamin, the former Quartermaster of MI6, wondered if James had returned yet, or was he dead too.

Benjamin didn’t want to think about that. He didn’t want to dwell on the ‘might have been’s in his life. He couldn’t. Instead he focused on the remembering all the good things and the happy things. He had to. It would be the only way he would be able to get through this.

He closed his eyes and thought back to the first time he ever heard James’ voice. The gruff and sexy voice that made his skin tingle and a bolt of expectation would shoot up his spine. It was in the National Gallery. He wasn’t sure why he had suggested it to Tanner, but he did. Maybe he felt safer there than anywhere else in London. The site of his favorite family outings as a child. The place he enjoyed decompressing after hours of studying at LUC. Maybe he just liked the place.

Benjamin had heard about Bond even before even meeting the alpha. Benjamin had been in the room when Eve Moneypenny had said ‘Agent down’. He had watched as everyone appeared shocked that the man could actually die. Of course, he could die. Anyone could die. They worked at jobs where people died every day. What was so unusual about an agent dying, let alone a Double ‘O’. Those elite agents had the shortest life expectance.

Benjamin needed to know what made James Bond so special to so many people, especially to M and his boss, Major Boothroyd. He read all of James Bond’s previous mission reports. He analyzed Bond’s success rate compared to other agents. He studied the faces of all the confirmed kills and stared at the faces of all the women who claimed to love him. Benjamin read all the reprimands as well as all the commendations. He also read where Bond had turned down the offer of a knighthood after he stopped a terrorist in Jamaica. He read about Bond being shot with a bullet that had been dipped in snake venom. Just another escape from death. Another chapter in a legend of the dead agent.

But Bond wasn’t dead. He miraculously returned from the other side. Again. And now after the attack on MI6, Benjamin was supposed to meet with him. And not as a member of Q branch but as Bond superior. His Quartermaster. Benjamin didn’t sleep the night before the meeting. He paced his small flat wondering how he could get out of the meeting. His cats yowled at him as he stepped over them while he tried to come up with a believable excuse for cancelling the meeting.

Unable to come up with anything plausible, he arrived at the National Gallery before Bond did. As soon as Bond entered the museum, Benjamin saw him. The calm collected British gentleman with the tailored wool coat. The blatant indifference on his face as he walked past the artwork. The detached attitude of English elite. He followed the agent through the rooms until Bond arrived at the designated meeting point and sat down. For several minutes, Benjamin watched him from the other rooms. Peeking around corners and cautiously watching through his peripheral vision. He observed as Bond stared straight ahead at the painting by Turner, ignoring everyone else in the room. The man’s face still and unreadable. His body relaxed but motionless. Benjamin wondered what Bond was thinking. He wondered why Bond had returned. What would Bond say? What would he think of Benjamin? Would he accept an omega as his Quartermaster?

The young man decided to face it head on. That’s what his father would tell him what to do. That’s how he had handled every other difficult moment in his life. Head on. No turning back, no retreat.

Benjamin walked slowly into the room and sat down next to Bond. The agent’s response to Benjamin’s initial greetings was predictable. He thought Benjamin was trying to pick him up, and Bond decided to leave. When Benjamin introduced himself as Bond’s new Quartermaster, the agent dismissed him as being too young. Benjamin bristled at the man’s cheek. Benjamin’s natural snarkyness came out and remarkably Bond seemed to appreciate that. Benjamin smiled.

Now six years later, after that first meeting at the National Gallery, Benjamin sat quietly under the chestnut tree. He smiled again. His hand smoothed down over his jumper and over the bulge underneath it. The round solidness of his abdomen and the life within. Their child.


	2. Why Can't it be Simple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benjamin thinks about the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank you for the encouraging comments. I hope I don't disappoint any one. This will be a slow build and very heavy on emotions. Expect tears. Also I do not have a beta this time so if you see any mistakes please let me know I will fix them. thank you.

June 2019

The clouds had rolled over the small cottage and the sunny day had turned grey. As the first raindrops dotted the windows, Benjamin filled the kettle. He placed it on the stand and clicked it on. Picking up the box of decaffeinated tea, Benjamin frowned. He hated the tea, but it was better than none at all. It was one of many concessions he had made during his pregnancy. He only hoped his child would someday come to appreciate all of the sacrifices he had made. Benjamin thought back to the last time he had had a decent cup of tea.

It had been at MI6. It was six weeks after James had left for Russia. The agent was infiltrating a Russian crime syndicate and was operating outside of direct contact with MI6. Benjamin didn’t like it, but it was part of the job and therefore had to be accepted. He was expecting to start his heat soon and was missing Bond greatly. They had been seeing each other for several months now and had already shared one heat. Benjamin was looking forward to sharing another.

Benjamin hadn’t been feeling well. He felt tired and irritable.

“You haven’t eaten today, have you?” Danielle Marsh, Benjamin’s second in command, asked.

“No time.” Benjamin said as he sipped his third cup of Earl Grey that morning.

“Don’t worry. I sent Margo over to Pret to get you a sandwich.” She held up the familiar sack with the Pret A Manager logo printed on the outside of it.

Benjamin looked up suspiciously. “Smoke salmon?”

“Of course.” She smiled.

It was Benjamin’s favorite sandwich from the café. A simple sandwich of smoke salmon on nutty wheat bread with butter. It was perfect with tea. He smiled too.

“Gi’me, gi’me!” He reached out for the sack and Danielle laughed as she handed it over to the young man.

“I’ve brought in the budget requests from R and D. I thought we could go over them while you ate.” Danielle said as she sat down.

Benjamin hummed agreement as he quickly opened the sack and removed the boxed sandwich from inside. He took two bites of the sandwich and enjoyed the various textures of chewy bread and creamy salmon. He took a large gulp of his tea to swallow it down. Savoring the different tastes. Then he twisted and quickly threw it back up into the waste bin.

“Q?!” Danielle yelped.

Benjamin wiped his mouth with a serviette then threw up again. “Sorry. I don’t know what is wrong.”

“Is the sandwich bad? Bad fish?” Danielle asked.

“No, I don’t . . . it didn’t taste off. But I don’t think I can eat it.”

Benjamin suddenly found the scent of the sandwich repellant. He shoved it back into the bag and handed the bag to Danielle. He felt flushed and queasy. He took another sip of tea to wash the foul taste from his mouth.

“You’re green. Are you alright? Do you want me to get you something else?” she asked.

“I’ll just drink my tea.” Benjamin felt his stomach twist at the thought of food. “I must be coming down with the flu. It’s been going around.”

“What flu? I don’t know of anyone being sick.”

Benjamin glanced up at her confused. “Well, maybe it’s . . . something else.”

“Just as long as you aren’t pregnant, you’ll be fine.” She laughed.

Benjamin groaned and laughed too, as Danielle left his office. Once she was out of the office, his laughter died down and a weight began to press down on his chest.

What if he was pregnant? What would he say to James? What would James say? What would the alpha do?

The two had agreed against bonding. Regulations required active Double ‘O’ agents to not have mates or acknowledged children. It was a risk to have anyone that close to the operative. Their mates or children could be used against them. It was bad enough when it happened to regular field agents. There had been several situations in the past when lower level agents had become double agents to protect their families. Such pressure applied to a Double ‘O’ agent would be horrendous.

Benjamin and James had become lovers during a mission to France. Benjamin thought it was a one-time thing and would end before they returned to London. To his surprise, James continued to want to sleep with him. The relationship was a secret. They had not made any formal notification to MI6 regarding it. They really hadn’t even discussed it between the two of them. In the back of his mind, Benjamin was certain that James would eventually grow restless and move one to another conquest, but until he did, Benjamin was going to enjoy himself with alpha. Great sex with no strings attached.

But there were strings, and they were attached to Benjamin’s heart. There were so many things that pulled Benjamin towards the alpha. James’ incredible blue eyes and mischievous smile. His gorgeous body and perfectly formed arse. But it was more than just physical. James was interesting to talk to. He was well read and had marvelous stories about all the places he had traveled to over the years. As their relationship evolved over the past year, it became less about sexual release and more about just being together. Shared evenings in, and laughter over dinners out. Laying in on Sundays and late-night walks during the week. Regardless of how hard Benjamin tried, he found himself falling in love with the alpha. He knew he needed to keep the situation simple, but he couldn’t help falling for the agent. And knowing how much he loved James, Benjamin knew he would never make a demand on James to change.

That night he went to two different chemists and bought three different pregnancy tests. Each test was positive. Benjamin sat on the edge of his bathtub staring at the last test. The small pick heart on the porous stick seemed to be mocking the omega. _‘You’re pregnant, idiot. What did you expect? Sleeping with one of the most virile alphas alive. Of course, you are pregnant.’_

As Benjamin sat there, his mobile rang. Benjamin looked at it. It was TJ from Q branch. Benjamin’s hands were shaking as he answered the phone.

“Q here,”

“Gov, we don’t have all the information yet, but I thought you should know.” TJ’s words rushed out of the speaker.

“What is it?” Benjamin didn’t recognize his own voice.

“Dimitri Popovs has been found dead in his flat.”

Benjamin recognized the name of his counterpart in the FSB. TJ continued when his boss didn’t say anything.

“It’s sketchy right now, but it appears it was a suicide.”

“Dimitri wouldn’t kill himself.” Benjamin said.

“Someone killed him then.”


	3. Diogenes Club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benjamin and Mycroft talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kind comments and encouragement. Please enjoy the next chapter.

June 2019

The warm Spring morning turned into a rainy grey afternoon. Benjamin felt the chill, from the drizzle, invade the small cottage. He went and lit the gas fireplace. The small cheery fire fought hard against the cold but failed. Eventually the cold temperatures forced Benjamin to slip one of his wooly jumpers on. Now taught over his expanding belly.

Benjamin sat in a rocking chair and watched as the flames flickered over the ceramic logs in the fireplace. The heat from the flames slowly reached his face but he was still cold. He pulled an old blanket over himself. The sound of the rain softly hitting the windows made his mind wander. His memory slipped back to another rainy day in March, almost three months earlier. The day when he had to face his brother and tell him the truth. It would be the only way that Mycroft would help him.

Most people found the Diogenes Club intimidating, but normally Benjamin wasn’t included in that group. Mycroft had maintained private rooms at the club since Benjamin was a child. When Benjamin was a young boy, he spent many afternoons, reading silently by the massive fireplace in Mycroft’s rooms while he waited for his brother to finish a phone call or paperwork before driving them both home to their parents’ house. More than once, Benjamin had fallen asleep before leaving and was gently carried by Mycroft out the door of the stately club.

It wasn’t until Benjamin was in school that he came to loath the club. When the young omega was in school, he had been brought to the Diogenes Club to be interrogated by his older alpha brother. Questioned about friendships the omega was forming or grades that should have been better. Those occasions, Benjamin had been angry at Mycroft. But this time, as Benjamin sat silently waiting to his brother, the omega was frightened.

Benjamin wondered how it could have happened. When could it have happened? They had been careful. His relationship with the alpha had been a secret. It had to be. They had used protection when Benjamin finally allowed the alpha to share a heat with him. The man being very careful to keep Benjamin safe. It just couldn’t have happened.

But that pink heart glared out at the young omega like a neon sign stating the obvious. Benjamin was pregnant and unbound. There were no plans on bonding. He didn’t want to be bonded. He was positive the alpha didn’t want to either.

A man in full livery stepped up to Benjamin’s chair and bowed. He waved his glove hand and Benjamin knew his brother was ready to see him. Shaking slightly, the omega followed the servant into the private rooms of Mycroft Holmes. Benjamin waited until the door was firmly closed before he spoke.

“Thank you for making time to see me today.”

Mycroft was sitting behind his desk. His face was down, and his attention was fixed on a report he was reading. Mycroft’s fountain pen was skimming across the paper as he made corrections to the report’s wording. He continued to read the report, not looking at his younger brother when he spoke.

“Not at all. I always have time for you, Benjamin.” Mycroft said as he finally looked up at his brother. An insincere smile fixed upon his face.

Mycroft took a moment to carefully exam his younger brother. Alcott Benjamin Winston Holmes was sickly looking. The young omega was normally pale, but there was almost a green cast to the colour of his skin. Dark circles were present under Benjamin’s eyes and his normally dark lips were pale and chapped.

“What is wrong?” Mycroft asked immediately.

Benjamin flinched at the sound of concern in Mycroft’s voice. Mycroft’s anxiety caused Benjamin for feel even more guilty. He needed his brother’s help, but he didn’t realize how difficult it was going to be to ask.

“Nothings really wrong.” Benjamin started. He glanced down at his stomach.

“You are sick.” It was a firm statement.

Benjamin fumbled with something to say. He gave up and sat down in the chair opposite Mycroft’s desk.

“I’m not really sick.” He said.

“You are overtly pale. You appear nauseous. You have gained weight, but your cheeks are hollow, and your wrists appear thinner. And your scent . . .”

Benjamin felt the ground slip out from underneath him. He hadn’t thought about his scent. He didn’t realize it had shifted already. It would be obvious to his brother.

Mycroft’s eyes suddenly grew larger as his eyebrows migrated up his forehead.

“Who is the alpha?” Mycroft demanded. An icy edge came rapidly to the alpha’s voice.

Benjamin gripped the armrests of the chair and took a deep breath to calm himself. Instantly, the old resentments surfaced again. The memories of Mycroft questioning him about boyfriends and new acquaintances in school. He couldn’t lose his temper at his brother. Benjamin needed Mycroft’s help.

“An agent. A double ‘O’. And before you ask, he doesn’t know.” Benjamin said as calmly as he could. He was relieved his voice didn’t quaver.

“A spy? Not very observant if he doesn’t realize he has gotten you pregnant.”

“He has been on a mission since the first week of January. We haven’t seen each other. We’ve only spoken over comm links.”

“Not the most appropriate place to inform him he will be a father.”

Benjamin closed his eyes and fought back his emotions. “I don’t want him to know.”

Mycroft set his pen down on the desktop and leaned back into his chair.

“Is there a reason why you do not want him to know? Will I be ordering the termination of one of her Majesty’s spies?” Mycroft’s hand reached for the phone on his desk.

“NO!” Benjamin’s voice cracked. He forced himself to calm down and took a deep breath. “No, please don’t.”

“Benjamin, explain yourself.”

Benjamin closed his eyes and swallowed the whimper in his throat. Tears were stinging the corners of his eyes, but he blinked them away.

“James is not responsible for this.”

“Last time I checked, it usually took two for a pregnancy to happen.”

Benjamin nodded his head and sighed. “Yes, I mean, I take full responsibility for my situation. I’m not terribly sure how this happened, but James always uses protection. He insists. But I guess nothing is hundred percent effective . . .” Benjamin paused. “We may have slipped up.”

“Things got, shall we say, out of hand?” Mycroft sneered.

Benjamin didn’t need to hear Mycroft’s condescending tone.

“I’m an adult, Mycroft. I am willing to take responsibility for this.”

“And this ‘James’ of yours. Why he is he not going to be involved?” Mycroft asked again.

“He is an agent. A double ‘O’. Double ‘O’ agents are not allowed to have bondmates or acknowledged children. It is too dangerous for them. If he was to acknowledge our child, he would have to give up being an agent.”

“And he is unwilling to do so?”

“I am unwilling to put him in that position. He doesn’t deserve that.” Benjamin said with as much sincerity as he could give. Then he frowned. “But James is not the reason I am here.”

“Pray, tell me why you have chosen to include me in your deception?” Mycroft said coldly.

“I will not deceive our family. I will tell Mummy and Daddy, but . . .” Benjamin hesitated and licked his lips again. “James is not the only one who could be compromised by a child. As quartermaster I would be too. Even if I leave, the fact that I was the Quartermaster of MI6 places my child’s life in jeopardy.”

“You wish to give it up for adoption?” Mycroft asked softly, feeling his brother’s pain for the first time.

“No. I need to make sure no one will think to look for us. No one would come after us.”

“You want to die?” Mycroft said.

“Yes. Benjamin Holmes needs to die.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter Bond appears.


	4. Welcome Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bond returns from a mission to learn some bad news.

June 2019

James Bond climbed out of the helicopter and onto the roof of Vauxhall 1. He looked up and smiled as the sun warmed his face. He had spent the last five months in Russia and the Ukraine. The cold of February and March had seeped so deep into him that his bones ached with it. He was glad to be back in London. The mission was successful, and he was looking forward to down time for once. He had a plan.

He smiled as he walked across the tarmac of the helipad and towards the roof access door. His stride was loose and smooth moving. An almost sensual glide as he entered the building. Bond had set his mind on an idea and it included his remarkable Quartermaster. He didn’t real care what M or Tanner thought of his relationships, but if his plan was to succeed, then he was going to have to allow the administration of MI6 to stick their collective noses into his private business.

Bond and Q had been seeing each other for over a year now. Secretively. Ever since a mission to stop human traffickers that required Q’s presence.

_It was supposed to be a simple in and out mission. Bond was there mostly as protection to Q who was supposed to break into a private server without an internet connection. Bond had been against the Quartermaster accompanying him to the criminal’s home, but Q needed to be on-site, using one of the human trafficker’s computers. It was decided that Bond would keep the slaver busy while Q obtained all the information regarding the human traffickers. It was going perfectly until a guard decided to use the boss’ bathroom in the man’s private office instead of the more public one. The young guard came into his boss’ office to find Q sitting behind his boss’ desk, typing away at his boss’ secured computer._

_Bond was at a dinner party with the human trafficker and his omega when he heard the sharp snap of a gun being fired in his ear. No one else heard it. His eyes glanced sideways at the security guard. There was a muffled crackle over the guard’s radio. Bond’s adrenaline was spiking. He fought to remain calm, as he struggled to listen to the coms. _

_“Bond, I’ve just been spotted.” _

_“Are you injured?” He carefully disguised his question with a casual wipe of his mouth with a napkin. _

_“No, but I shot a guard.” Q said. _

_Bond was astounded at how calm Q sounded. He could hear the typing in the background. Bond couldn’t stop the small smile that came to his lips as he realized Q would complete his mission regardless of what was happening. _

_“Can you get out?” He asked as he bought a glass of wine to lips to cover them. _

_“I shot him, but someone is going to come looking for him soon. I just need five more minutes.” _

_Bond held the glass up to the light as he swirled it. He brought it back down and took a deep breath of the bouquet. “I can get you maybe three minutes.” _

_“Do it.” Q said as he typed as fast as he could. “I’ll see you at the rendezvous.” _

_Bond took a sip of the wine then threw the glass as hard as he could at the human trafficker. The slender glass shattered on the man’s forehead. Wine and blood streaked down his face. The omega sitting next to him gasped. _

_Bond grabbed his dinner plate and threw it at the nearest guard. The man tried to duck but the china hit his head. The broken shards peppered the man’s face. An omega screamed, as guests started to flee. Then Bond shot the other guard in the room. The human trafficker was on his feet yelling for more guards. His omega wife and other dinner guests were running from the room. _

_Q suddenly heard the scream and sound of breaking china. There were shouts and then gun fire coming over the microphone in his ear. He heard running feet just outside the door of the office. He paused in his typing and picked his gun up again. Q’s heart was beating so hard, it should have broken his ribs. The sound of running feet moved away as the guards who were coming to check on their friend were now going to stop the crazy man who was shooting up the dinner party. _

_Q quickly finished stealing the information and backed out of the system. He erased the logs showing he had been there. Q checked to make sure everything looked the same as on the desk. Q slipped the gun back into his ankle holster. He tugged once on the black waistcoat he was wearing and adjusted his glasses before he grabbed the tray of empty glasses. He looked like any other waiter at the formal dinner party. Q opened the door slowly and glanced out into the hallway. There was shouting coming from the dining room and gun fire. Q could see guests running from the room. Q moved cautiously towards the kitchen. _

_Bond ran out of the dining room, pushing the fleeing guests out of his way. A woman tripped in front of him. Her high heels catching on the hem of his gown. She fell to the floor, pulling her dinning partner down with her. Bond leaped over the two bodies, then grabbed the arm of another man. He pushed him down too, adding to the pile of people blocking the guards pursuing him. _

_Once he was clear of most of the guests, he twisted and fired again. Not aiming at anyone specific but causing the guards to duck and slow down. _

_Bond rushed down the hallway towards the kitchens. He turned the corner and saw Q standing with two other waiters. He glanced once at Q, then turned and fired at the guards. He ran pass the three waiters and leaped through the window. The glass shattered and the wooden frame splintered. _

_Guards came rushing into the hallway, shooting at Bond’s fleeing figure. Q and the other waiters ducked as the guards rushed forward. Unexpectedly, Q flayed his arms in excitement and yelled as if he was frightened. His thrashing arms pushed one of the waiters beside him into the running men. The guards and the waiter crashed together and ended up as a heap on the floor. _

_“Oh my God!” Q shouted. _

_He reached down to grab the waiter. Just as the man was halfway to his feet, Q appeared to lose his grip on the man, and he let the waiter fall backwards into the guards. Again, the men fell to the floor. _

_“Just get the hell out of the way!” the guard shouted. _

_Q jumped back and ran away, pretending to be a frightened omega waiter. He rushed down the hall, followed by the other waiters. They reached the kitchen and the two real waiters started shouting to the staff what had happened. While the kitchen staff was transfixed on the waiters, Q slowly backed away and out the door. _

_Bond ran towards the parked cars. He leaped into the car he had driven there and was leaving when he noticed Q walking quickly to a delivery truck. Bond’s car was speeding out of the gate, followed quickly by guards in jeeps and trucks. _

_Q slowly drove up to the delivery entrance and stopped before the confused guard at the gate. _

_“What’s going on?” Q asked the young beta guard. _

_“I don’t . . . can you leave?” The man seemed confused as to what to do since his superior was presently chasing the crazy British man who had just ruined the dinner party. _

_“Of course, I can leave. Do you need to search the van?” _

_The guard looked perplexed but after a few seconds nodded no. He doubted the omega was any threat to anyone. He smiled at the young man and waved him through. _

_Bond easily loss his pursuers through the streets of the city. He made it back to the rendezvous within an hour of leaving the house. He was pacing in the hotel room, wondering if he should go out looking for Q. Realizing he shouldn’t have left the man alone to get himself out of the house. As soon as the door opened, Bond grabbed Q and pinned him to the wall. _

_“Are you alright?!” The agent’s hands roamed down Q’s arms and down his sides. Anxiety and fear, both playing on his nerves. _

_“I’m fine.” Q said as he tried to wiggle away from the alpha. _

_The omega’s struggles registered as rebellion to the alpha. Bond growled and pulled Q back. “I saw what you did! You could have been captured . . . or worse!” _

_“I’m fine. Trust me.” Q tried to reassure the man. _

_Bond looked up into the younger man’s hazel green eyes. He stared at Q’s puffy red lips and impish expression. Then the agent smiled. His adrenaline being overwhelmed by other biochemicals. Fear being replaced by relief and exhilaration. He leaned further forward and paused just before his lips touched Q’s. _

_“I wouldn’t trust anyone else.” He whispers. His breath hot across Q’s skin. _

_The younger omega shivered and felt the magnetic pull of the blond. His own body enjoying the release from fear. Bond’s hands holding Q’s shoulders were warm and heavy on the man’s frame. Q was glad they were there because he suddenly felt very dizzy. _

_“Good . . .” Q’s breath carried the word. _

_Then Q felt the warm press of Bond’s lips on his. The alpha pushing his body into the Q’s. The electric surge of James’ fingertips sliding up his neck and into Q’s hair. _

It was an intense encounter in a hotel fueled by adrenaline, dopamine and serotonin. It was as much an affirmation of surviving as it was a physical release. Bond knew Q had read the files. Q didn’t ask for anything from Bond. Bond realized Q wasn’t expecting anything more from him. Bond wasn’t planning on repeating what he refused to call a mistake the next morning. Both men agreed. But when they returned to London, Bond didn’t stay away.

It started with Bond finding himself wandering through Q Branch at least once a day. After a month, he was bringing lunch to Q to make sure the omega ate that day. Then after one late night, he brought him dinner. Then after three dinners, he took Q home to his flat. 

It became a heady and passionate romance that the two shared after hours. Always away from prying eyes and wagging tongues. Bond found Q to be as remarkable in the bedroom as he was with a computer. Q was not the typical omega that Bond was used too. He was intelligent and well read. Brave and loyal. Bond found himself enjoying himself as much out of bed as in bed. They shared similar tastes and where they differed, the differences complimented each other. 

He and Q had fourteen months together before Bond was sent out on the five-month extended mission to Russia. Most of the time Bond was operating completely alone, unable to contact MI6. Unable to speak to Q. He hated it. That is when he decided it was time to change the parameters of their relationship. He didn’t know how he was going to convince Q, but he was positive he wanted the young man to move into his flat. He wanted to know Q would be there when he came back. And coming back would be a priority now. Knowing he would have those long lithe arms waiting for him and that lean warm body to curl around. Bond would return.

He found it strange how much his life had changed in the past few months. He was forty-one. Just four years from mandatory retirement from field work. He would have to step down as a Double ‘O’. Previously, Bond never imagined he would make it to retirement. But lately he was even considering early retirement. Maybe he should quit cutting small pieces of his soul out and protect was little of his humanity was left. He thought – he felt he might have a reason for doing so now. Someone he could do it for.

He remembered the last time he felt this way. He was younger. Much younger and not just in his body but also in his spirit. He had allowed his foolish heart to blind him to the truth. But this time he wasn’t foolish. This time was different. He knew how he felt. He believed Q felt that way too. The way the young man looked at him. The fact that Q wouldn’t put up with his shit like others had. That the man would tell him off then back him up whenever he asked. It was more than sex. It was more than just attraction. What he had with Q was a partnership. A real partner.

It was time to reach for more. With Q waiting for him, Bond could have a reason to come home. He had a reason to strive to survive. He could start thinking about a life after MI6. He would ask Q to move in with him.

Bond smiled to himself as he started down the stairs. He opened the door from the roof access staircase and stepped onto the executive floor of MI6. Tanner was waiting for him.

“Bond, M wants to speak to you.”

Bond slowed his steps and held back a ‘put upon’ sigh.

“Is this about that week I disappeared in France?” Bond asked. He wasn’t going to answer any questions about the time he slipped away from the mission to take care of some private business in Paris. His annoyance at the interruption of his plans obvious in his tone.

“France? No. It’s something else, something important.” Tanner said.

Bond took a moment to regard the man. Tanner looked paler than Bond remembered. He seemed diminished from what he was last time Bond saw the man. Dark shadows smeared his face. Tanner’s eyes appeared fatigued and red.

Bond hesitated in a cutting retort and gave a quick affirmative nod. Tanner thinned his lips and turned. Bond followed close behind him as he walked through the department and to the private offices of Garth Mallory.

Tanner opened the door and went into the outer office. Eve Moneypenny was sitting at her desk. She was turned away from the door and was staring out of the window. She didn’t even acknowledge the two men as they walked in. Bond’s normal teasing greeting was held back by the aberration of her detachment. He followed Tanner into Mallory’s inner office.

“Yes, Bond, very good. Please sit down.” Mallory scanned across his desk as if he was trying to find something. Bond thought it was a ploy to buy the man some time. Finally, Mallory looked up at Bond. “I was told that you were close to our Quartermaster.”

‘_So, this is the lecture’ _Bond thought. _‘Don’t fraternize with our Quartermaster if you know what is good for you.’ _ Bond prepared himself for the dressing down. ‘_Now was as good a time as any’_, Bond thought. He wanted to talk to Q first, but he had no problems in announcing his relationship with the Quartermaster now. To hell with the regulations. If Mallory wanted his resignation today, then that was fine by Bond.

“We are close. It wasn’t the common co-workers’ relationship.” Bond said coolly. Bond wondered where they had slipped up. He wondered how Mallory knew that he and Q were seeing each other.

“No, no. That’s not what I mean.” M said shaking his head. Bond could tell the man was having difficulty in finding the right words. “I was told that the two of you . . . well the two of you were . . . not that there is anything wrong with . . .”

“If you are asking if the Quartermaster and I are involved in a sexual relationship, the answer is yes. And we have performed our jobs excellently. I don’t feel that it is any reason to question our proficiency in performing our jobs.” Bond said firmly.

“No one is saying . . .” Mallory sighed again and closed his eyes. “I’ve always hated doing this. James, I am sorry to inform you, but our Quartermaster . . . Benjamin Holmes is dead.”

Bond didn’t move. It took a moment to realize what was being said. He understood the words, but he couldn’t understand why they were stringed together.

“There must be a mistake.” Bond spoke quietly.

“No mistake. It happened two months ago. A fire at his flat. The DNA was conclusive.”

_‘DNA’ _Bond thought. _‘that meant the body couldn’t be identified by facial features. Q’s body was destroyed in the fire.’_

“What happened?”

“It appears there was a leak in the gas stove. We don’t know happened exactly but there was an explosion and a fire. One body was recovered from the building. All the other residents were out. It was a miracle actually.” Tanner said.

Bond didn’t think it was a miracle. It was a bloody tragedy. Q was gone. His Q was gone.

“You said DNA was used to identify the body.” Bond continued.

“The body was burnt beyond recognition. DNA was simplest method to identify Q. I’m sorry. I’m aware that the two of you were . . . more than just friends.”

Bond sat perfectly still. He refused to move. That couldn’t be all. That couldn’t be everything.

“Are we positive it was an accident? There wasn’t any reason to believe it could have been an assassination attempt?” Bond was grabbing at anything he could fight against.

“The fire investigation was final after four days. Accidental explosion was the conclusion.” Mallory said calmly.

“It was final after four days?! Impossible. It can’t be. There has to be more!” Bond shouted. He stood up.

Tanner and M quickly glanced at each other, then Mallory’s gaze fell back on the angry agent. Bond’s skin was flush, and his eyes flashed cold. Bond’s hand twitched as if needing to hold a gun.

“It seems senseless . . .”

“Because it is!” Bond growled. “Q can’t be dead . . . not killed by something as stupid as a gas leak. Do you honestly think our Quartermaster would miss the smell of natural gas in his flat? That he would be stupid enough to go looking for the source of the leak with a lit match? There has to more! There must be!”

“Bond, it’s been investigated . . .”

“I want to see his body!” Bond demanded.

Mallory glanced at Tanner again then turned back. “That is impossible. His body was claimed by his family.”

“His family? I didn’t know Q had any family.”

“Q’s older brother took charge of his body. We were told they had it cremated and a private ceremony at their estate. No one other than family was allowed to attend.”

Rage and pain surged through Bond. “Benjamin and I were . . .”

“Were what? He wasn’t your bondmate. You weren’t even living together. You don’t have any claim to him. None whatsoever. If his family wanted to make this a private affair, we had to respect their decision. We had our own memorial here.”

“This is wrong, and you know it! Q was murdered and no one seems to want to investigate it. He was whisked away by a family no one has ever met and cremated before we can do a thorough investigation.”

“Bond, it wasn’t murder. It was a stupid, senseless accident. I’ve met Q’s brother before this happened. I know his family. If Q didn’t relay information about his family to you, maybe you weren’t as important to him as you thought.”

The statement burned through Bond’s chest. ‘_Maybe I didn’t know Benjamin as well as I thought. Maybe it meant more to me than it did to him.’_ Bond felt sick. He wanted to throw up.

“We probably should have waited to have his memorial service until you returned but . . . well, we didn’t. Q meant a great deal to everyone around here. We wanted to do something for him since we couldn’t attend his funeral. I’m sorry we didn’t wait for you, but you can understand.” 

Bond glared at Mallory. He squared his shoulders and sneered. “Sir.” The tone of _‘fuck you’_ was an under currant in words.

Bond turned on his heels and left the office. Moneypenny glanced up from staring out the window.

“Oh, James . . .”

He ignored her and kept walking out of the office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the lovely comments. The next chapter will be very emotional.


	5. Darkness Descends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bond after he learns of Benjamin's death

June 2019

Bond sat in his flat and finished the bottle of scotch; sitting on his couch in his sleeping pants and his Royal navy t-shirt. The shirt was a favorite of Q’s. He wore it every time he spent the night at James’. The cotton was worn soft, and holes appeared at the neckline and the underarm seams. It still retained some of Q’s scent. Something between the smells of baking cookies and Earl Grey tea.

He could hear Q’s laughter in the darkness. The feel of the young man’s body resting against his own. Bond’s memories slipped back to a Sunday morning, many months ago.

_They had been at Vauxhall late_ _the night before. Q had been on the coms with 003 trying to extricate the man from Bagdad. Hit squads had been following the agent through the streets of the city. It was almost four in the morning by the time the exfil team notified Q-Branch that 003 was with them and safe. _

_Bond took Q back to his flat and the two fell into bed together. Adrenaline and relief fueling their activities for the next few hours. Bond woke up first. Q’s face was pressed into Bond’s side. The omega taking deep slow breathes of the alpha’s scent. Q’s arm wrapped around Bond’s chest and their legs tangled together. _

_James brought his hand up and slowly dragged his fingers through the dark curls. Q hummed and smiled as he rubbed his nose deeper into James’ armpit. James’ laugh rumbled between the two of them and Q slowly opened his eyes. Blushing as he was caught bathing in the alpha’s scent, Q tried to hide his face. _

_“Enjoying yourself?” James asked. _

_“Almost as much as last night.” Q said as he tried to roll away. James caught him and wouldn’t let him move too far away. _

_“Before or after we got to the flat?” _

_Q playfully slapped at the alpha’s chest. “Afterwards, you berk.” _

_James laughed again and rolled over Q’s body and pressed a kiss to the plumb lips. Q sighed and allowed the alpha to explore his mouth again. After several minutes of kissing and mutual touches, Q gently pressed James back. _

_“I need to ask a favor of you.” He whispered. _

_James was going to tease the younger man but saw the apprehension in Q’s hazel eyes. He leaned up and rested on his bent elbow. _

_“Alright, if I can.” He knew he would probably do anything Q asked of him, including murdering someone, but he didn’t want the omega to know how much James cared for him. _

_“I was hoping I could borrow two of your shirts.” _

_“My shirts?” _

_“Yes, two shirts that you’ve worn and have your scent on them.” Q scooted slightly up the bed and pressed his shoulders to the headboard. James remained where he was now looking up at Q. _

_“Two dirty shirts?” _

_“Not dirty, per say, just . . . scented.” _

_“Okay, why?” James was confused. _

_Q blushed deeply. He pulled the sheet up and covered his bare chest. He glanced away before he spoke. _

_“Well, next week, I’ll need to be gone for a few days.” _

_“A trip?” James asked still not certain how his shirts played into it. _

_“No,” Q kept his attention focused on the opposite wall instead of James. “My heat.” The blush deepened. Even Q’s ears were red now. _

_“Oh.” James sighed. “And my shirts will make it easier?” _

_“The scent of an alpha. Well, not any alpha but an alpha I’m . . . involved with. It will lessen some of the more painful aspects of heat. Reduce the cravings, if you understand what I mean.” _

_“My scent would make your heat more comfortable for you.” James said. Something warm seemed to bloom within him. _

_Q finally looked at James. “Yes, it really would.” _

_“You said your heat is next week?” _

_Q nodded his head. James reached up and took Q’s hand within his. He laced their fingers together. Q relaxed into the touch and slouched down into the bed. James leaned forward and lightly dragged his nose up Q’s shoulder. He wondered how Q would smell during his heat. Would his delicious scent become stronger? Would it be overwhelming?_

_“Wouldn’t it be better if you had the alpha there instead of just his scent?” James whispered into Q’s skin. _

_James could feel Q shiver underneath him. _

_“It would be dangerous. I couldn’t ask that of you.” _

_James could hear of roughness to Q’s voice. The wave of desire crashing into the younger man. _

_“Danger is relative. I mean it’s not like I would breaking into an armed headquarters of a criminal mastermind. No explosions or gunfire.” He continued to drag his nose across Q’s sensitive skin. Marveling as gooseflesh rose behind his touch. _

_Q’s laughter wasn’t more than a heavy exhale. “No, but there could be long term complication if we weren’t careful.” _

_“We could take precautions. There are things we could do to prevent long-term complications.” James said as he kissed Q’s shoulder. His eyes flicking up to watch Q through his lashes. Q’s face was flushed a lovely shade of arousal. His jade green eyes were wide and dark. The plumb lips were parted, and his pink tongue was licking his lower lip. _

_James could feel his groin filling rapidly. He wanted the omega more in that very moment than he had_ _ever wanted him before._

Suddenly, Bond was back in his darken flat, alone. Q was gone. He wasn’t coming back. He was dead.

Bond’s eyes were red. If someone else had been there, he would tell them it was because he was drunk. Not because he had been crying. The bottle sat empty on the low coffee table in front of him. Bond was too exhausted to get up and find another bottle.

He stared blankly at the bare wall opposite the couch. Q had told Bond he needed to decorate. Q had offered to help Bond finally hang his framed photographs and paintings that were presently stacked in the corner. Bond scoffed and said he like the flat as it was. Besides all he ever did there was sleep. Well, sleep and have sex with Q.

But that wasn’t true either. Over the last few months with the man it was less about sex and more about being together. It could even be said that there were times it was almost like making love.

Bond closed his eyes and swallowed the wail that clung to the back of his throat. He forced himself to think about something else. Any thing else. But he couldn’t. He replayed the speech he was going to give Q to convince him to move in with Bond. Persuade the young omega that they should be together and tell MI6 to go to hell if they didn’t approve. Bond wondered what Q would have said. What would his answer be?

He dragged his hands down his face. The stubble from his beard growth was sharp and burned his palms. He could hear Q chastising him for not shaving. Q said he hated getting a beard burn from Bond’s stubble, but James thought that Q secretly enjoyed having a mark on him left by Bond. Something visible to prove they were together. That Q belonged to him. Or maybe it was James’ selfish nature that thought the omega wanted a visible mark. Bond knew he would never give him one. Never a bond mark. 

He felt sick again. He leaned forward and lower his head. James thought it could be his stomach revolting against all the alcohol and no food for the past twenty-four hours. Or it could be something else. He tried to remember the symptoms of a bond breaking between alphas and omegas. The omega was the one who suffered the most from a breaking bond, but alphas also suffered. He tried to remember.

He wondered if maybe they had been bonded together without the bite. Something like a scent bond or maybe just the close physical presence. But that couldn’t be. Bond’s five-month mission to Russia would have erased such a tenuous bond. He would have felt sick while he was away.

So, this wasn’t his body adjusting to a bond breaking. This was just himself realizing that he had lost Benjamin, his Q. That the young man was gone. He would never see Benjamin’s face again. See the soft jade green eyes, that could flash with brilliance as quickly as anger. See the smooth flawless skin of Benjamin’s body. Feel the touch of Benjamin’s fingers across his skin. Taste Benjamin’s kisses; gone - forever.

Bond picked up the empty scotch bottle and heaved it across the room. The glass denting the plaster wall before it crashed to the floor. Splintering into dozens of glittering pieces.

Bond stood up and grabbed the edge of the coffee table. He tossed it at the wall too. The wooden frame cracked and broke as it punctured a hole into the wall. Bond went and kicked at his television set. The screen shattered. The whole thing toppling over backwards onto the floor with sparks and smoke. Bond grabbed the back of his other chair and flipped it over. Grunting and growling as he destroyed the contents of his flat.

He knocked the lamp off the end table. It flashed and sparked as the wires were pulled from it. Bond reached down and grabbed the book that had been sitting beside the lamp. He was just before throwing it when he recognized the cover. It was one of Benjamin’s books. One of the sci-fi books he like to read. ‘The Martian’.

Bond held the book in his trembling fingers. His whole body was shaking. He gasped and choked on a cry that was fighting its way out of his chest. His legs folded underneath him, and he collapsed down on the floor. The book still caught in his hands.

He wiped the tears from his eyes and he slowly opened the book. The pages fell to a point halfway through the book. Bond read a few lines. The marooned engineer had received his first message from earth. NASA had just learned he was alive. Bond blinked back another tear.

If only it could be true. If only it was a mistake. A wrong assumption.

James looked back down at the book. Holding Benjamin’s place in the book was a business card. James pulled it out and looked at it. The name was for a doctor James had never heard of. A general practitioner named John Watson.

Bond studied the card. He had never heard Benjamin mention this man before. He didn’t know who Watson was or why Benjamin would have his card. Bond looked at the address of the clinic where Watson worked. It wasn’t even close to where Benjamin would go to see a doctor.

Bond stared at the card for several minutes as his mind tried to deduce as much as it could from it. The card was old, so Benjamin had to have had it for a while. If Watson was no one important, then Benjamin would have thrown the card out, but he didn’t. Watson was someone important. If he was important, then why did Bond not know anything about him. Who was he? Who was he to Benjamin?

Bond closed the book as he stood up. The card was still clasped between his fingers as he came to a decision. He would find John Watson and maybe find out why he was important to Benjamin. Maybe he would find out why Benjamin was dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to say that updates will be coming slower from now on. Unfortunately, RL has reared its ugly head again.


	6. Meeting Watson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the delay in downloading this chapter. As I said last time, RL has gotten in the way. Some of you know what I do for a living and I deeply appreciate your support through this difficult time.

June 2019

Bond had lied to M. He knew that Q had family.

_It was the third time they had slept together once they returned from the human trafficker mission. They were in Q’s flat. Bond had gotten up and fixed himself a cup of coffee and Q, a cup of tea. He was walking back into the bedroom, expecting to find the Quartermaster still sound asleep in the bed. Instead, Q was awake and speaking on his phone. _

_“You don’t have to lecture to me.” His tone was sharp and agitated. _

_For a brief moment, Bond wondered if it was MI6. He glanced at his own mobile on the nightstand and saw there appeared to be no text messages or notification. He looked back at Q and saw the younger man reaching for the mug of tea. Bond handed it over to him while the young man argued with whomever was on the phone. _

_“I’m not a child. And I don’t appreciate you trying to insert yourself into my life. I thought after the last time you would know better.” Q snapped at the person on the phone. _

_Q stared off into the distance as he listened to the caller. He slowly took a sip of tea, then suddenly set the mug down hard on the nightstand. The hot tea splashed out of the mug and onto the top._

_“Don’t you even threaten to do so. Whatever I do with my agent is my business and none of yours. I only deleted your bank accounts last time. This time I can completely delete you from every data base in the world.” _

_Bond winced at the threat. He wondered who had gotten Q was angry. _

_“Good, I thought you might see reason.” Q paused for a moment. “I already told you I would be there. No reason to send out a retrieval party.” _

_Q disconnected the call and set his mobile down hard on the tabletop. He glared at it while Bond took another sip of his coffee. _

_“Should I leave?” _

_Q’s attention shifted back to the man. His eyes were wide in surprise and Q seemed to have forgotten the agent had been standing there. _

_“Oh! I’m sorry. It’s just my brother . . . the asshole.” Q ducked his head on the last two words. _

_“I can leave if you need to go and deal with that?” _

_Q waved his hand. “No, please don’t. I seem to spend all my time trying to help other people or save my agents or make things for my agents to save themselves. Now he wants to interfere in what little time I have for myself.”_

_Bond stepped closer and sat on the edge of the bed, beside Q. _

_“Right now, I just want to be alone with you.” _

_Bond smiled. “I can accommodate you.” _

_Bond leaned closer and kissed the corner of Q’s surprised mouth. _

_“Accommodate me?! Really?! Is that what you were doing last night?” _

_Bond reached over and set his coffee cup down. As he sat back, he wrapped his arm around Q’s waist and pulled him down onto the bed. _

_“No, last night I was having a wonderful time taking you apart. You make the most demanding sounds while I was in you.” _

_Q laughed softly as James started to kiss along Q’s throat. Q wrapped his arm around James’ body and pulled him close. James reciprocated and two men laid tangle in each other’s arms, sharing kisses that were teasing and chase. _

_“You are addictive, 007.” Q whispered. _

_“And you know a lot about addiction?” Bond rumbled back as he pushed Q’s face to the side so he could nipple on Q’s ear. _

_“More than I wanted too, but before you ask, not from personal experience. Family member.” _

_“Brother?” _

_“Yes.” Q said as he moved back to kiss James’ mouth. _

_“Same brother as on the phone?” _

_“No, that one is just an interfering bureaucrat.” _

_“So, two brothers? And you are the . . .?” James asked. _

_Q twisted back and looked at James suspiciously. “Are you interrogating me, 007?” _

_Bond smiled. “Force of habit.” _

_Q returned the smile. “For your information, I’m the most dangerous.” _

_Q swung his leg over James and burrowed closer into the man’s side. _

_“And the most tactile.” _

_“I like snuggling.” _

_“And the bureaucrat doesn’t?”_

_Q laughed out loud. “It would be like snuggling a porcupine.” _

_James wrapped his arms tightly around Q’s body and rolled him, so the younger man was resting on top of James’ chest. _

_“Ow. That sound’s painful.” _

_Q shrugged and frowned. “That’s really not very fair. My brother is not as cuddly as a porcupine.” _

_Both men laughed and then the next hour was taken up with another round of listening to Q’s demanding sounds as James took him apart. _

~Q~

Bond would never delude himself into believing that he was as competent with computers as Q, but he wasn’t a slouch either. Within an hour he had done a computer search of the doctor and learned who John Watson was.

Watson was a St. Bart’s trained surgeon. He had enlisted in the army and served as a combat surgeon in Afghanistan. He had been stationed with a frontline unit in Sangin. He had served with distinction and had been wounded. Watson had been discharged and given a pension for his service. But most importantly, Bond learned that John Watson knew one of the Holmes.

Bond found Watson’s blog and read about the man’s adventures with a detective named Sherlock Holmes. Bond found photos of Sherlock on the internet. Most of the photos were either blurry or Holmes’ face was partially or totally obscured. The single photo showing what the man’s whole face looked like was taken at an odd angle. It appears the photographer had shoved his camera within inches of Holmes’ face, distorting the details. 

The man had dark curls like Q, and pale flawless skin. His cheek bones appeared to be just as sharp with broad flat cheeks. But where there was a warmth and impish appearance to Q’s face, Sherlock appeared more aloof. Bond thought it might be the eyes that were the biggest difference between the two brothers. Q’s were a warm jade green with golden tones. Sherlock’s were a silvery-blue.

Bond wondered if Sherlock Holmes was a brother or maybe a cousin. He also might not be related at all, but Bond doubted that given the similarities he saw in the photos. He wondered if he was a brother, which brother was he; the junkie or the bureaucrat? He stared at the picture for several minutes. The man was reported as a ‘consulting detective’ who worked with Scotland Yard. He doubted that a junkie would be working with the police, but you could never be sure.

Bond showered and shaved. He dressed in cotton shirt and dark jeans. Within twenty minutes he found himself across the street from Speedy’s Café on Baker Street. It was an average street off a major one. The traffic wasn’t heavy, and Bond found a vantage point to watch the building unobserved. His eyes focused on the first-floor windows of the flat where John Watson was supposed to be living in. He was wondering how he could get into the flat without too much attention when he saw the front door open and Watson step out onto the pavement. The short-looking man glanced up and down the street as he zipped up his windcheater. He didn’t seem to notice Bond as he glanced around. Watson hesitated then turned to the right and walked towards Maryborne. Bond smiled briefly before he followed him discreetly.

Bond noticed that Watson had the cadence of a march. Rapid yet relaxed and smooth. A step that would cover a great distance with limited exertion. Watson’s hands were softly curled and swung equally on either side of his body, helping to propel him down the pavement. His head was up, and his eyes were scanning from side to side. Common reaction for someone who had been in combat; constantly looking for the next ambush or sniper. Watson’s years in the military were still apparent in his frame. 

Bond was intrigued.

He watched as Watson turned the corner and walked into a pub. Bond quickly followed him. He stepped through the doors and into the late afternoon crowd. The pub was crowded with what appeared to be customers who had just gotten off work and looking for a quick pint before heading home to screaming children and complaining spouses.

Watson waved at the barman and the big burly man nodded back. The bar man reached for a glass and pulled a beer for Watson as the shorter man considered the coins in his hand. He set several down on the bar and the barman swept them away with his meaty hand. Watson nodded again and took a long sip of the beer.

On the television, a football match was playing. There were some cheers from the crowd, and someone bumped into Bond, shoving the man slightly. Bond glanced sideways but didn’t see anyone paying attention to him. He looked back and Watson was gone. The beer he had been drinking was sitting on the bar, but the doctor wasn’t there.

Bond glanced around quickly and caught the movement of Watson’s back slip around the corner and down a hall. Bond moved quickly. He followed the man, remaining far enough back to not be seen by his quarry. Bond heard the sound of groaning hinges as a door was opened. Then the sound of the door slamming shut.

“Damn it.” Bond hissed and rushed down the hallway to the backdoor of the pub. He opened it and stepped out into an alley. The narrow street between the buildings smelled of trash and urine. He glanced to his left then his right and saw Watson turn down another footpath. Bond followed. He hesitated and glanced around the corner. It was a dead end. Watson was standing in the middle of the narrow alley, with his arms crossed over his chest, waiting.

“Com’on, I know you are there.” Watson called out.

Bond stepped around the corner and blocked Watson’s exit. Slowly, Bond stepped closer to Watson. He scanned the smaller man watching for any attack.

“Who are you? Why are you following me?” Watson called out.

“I don’t answer question. I ask them.” Bond said confidently.

“I don’t believe so.” Came a deep voice from behind Bond.

The agent spun quickly to see another man standing off to the side, blocking his escape from the alley. The man’s face hidden in the shadows of the buildings. Bond would have been worried, but his first thought was confusion and then disbelief. The man was thin with ravine curls. Pale skin and sharp angles.

“Benjamin!?” Bond whispered.

“No.” The man stepped further around the corner where Bond could get a better look at him. “Sherlock.”

As the man turned to face Bond, James could see it how much Sherlock and Benjamin looked alike.

“You are Sherlock Holmes, Benjamin’s . . . brother? Cousin?”

Sherlock raise an eyebrow and let his gaze move up and down the agent’s body. “Brother,” he said calmly. “You must be the alpha.”

“The alpha?” Bond asked confused.

“This is the bastard?!” Watson shouted from behind Bond.

Bond turned to see Watson move closer. Without a warning, Watson punched Bond in the face. James’ chin jerked sideways, and the pain erupted across the side of his face. Bond’s body was twisted at an odd angle and he was off balanced. He stumbled backwards two steps before he caught himself. He turned and raised his fist.

“I wouldn’t.” Sherlock said, again very calmly.

Bond turned to see a Walther in Holmes’ hand. Then upon a second glance, he realized it was his own gun being pointed at him. Bond’s hand reached for his holster under his jacket to find it empty.

“The pub. You’re the one who bumped me.”

Sherlock gave a quick condescending smile. Then he depressed the button on the grip of the gun and dropped the magazine out. He pulled the slide back and removed the round from the chamber. The gun was now empty and only good as a paper weight. Sherlock tossed the gun into one of the bins.

“Alright, why are you following John?” Sherlock asked as he shoved his hands into the pockets of the black wool coat.

“I wanted answers.” Bond said.

“And you thought John would have them?”

“Benjamin had his card. He didn’t tell me much about his family. I wanted to know why he is dead. I wanted to know why no one told me when he died.”

“Dead?” John asked.

James glance at him confused for a moment. Then noticed the shift in John’s expression. The man was hiding something.

“Let me guess, the Holmes are so freaking secretive, you weren’t even told he was dead.” Bond said.

John narrowed his eyes at Bond. For a brief moment, he thought the small doctor was going to punch him again.

“John is more than just family.” Sherlock gave John a fleeting glimpse. “The funeral was months ago. You want to know why he died. It was an accident.” Sherlock said. “Nothing sinister or unusual.”

“I don’t believe it was an accident. Benjamin wouldn’t have died that way.” Bond said.

“Only the fortunate get to choose their deaths. For the rest of us it is only chance. My brother is dead. My family chooses to morn in private.”

“I don’t think so. Something else is going on.” Bond said coolly.

“There is nothing going on other than the fact that a member of MI6 is following my friend. Now leave before I allow John to shoot you.”

Bond glance quickly at the small doctor. A wicked grin came to John’s round open face. He slowly reached behind his back and retrieved a Browning 9mm.

Bond hesitated for a moment. He weighed his options of taking the gun from the man or getting any more information from Benjamin’s brother. Bond turned back to Sherlock Holmes and raised his hands in mock surrender.

“I will not give this up. I will keep digging.” Bond said.

“And you will find an empty hole when you are done.” Sherlock replied. “John, shall we. Lestrade is waiting for us at the Met.”

Holmes turned and walked out of the alley. Watson went to follow him, giving Bond a wide berth as he passed. When he was further down the alley away from Bond, Watson slipped his gun into a holster secured at the small of his back.

Bond watched as the two men left the alley. He spent several minutes retrieving his own gun from the bin and looking for the missing magazine. He would leave the bullet behind for someone else to find.


	7. Assurances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Sherlock have a 'domestic'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter I hope you enjoy. As I said before, I do not have a beta so if there are any mistakes please let me know. thank you for the wonderful comments and support.

June 2019

Sherlock winced at the sound of the breaking glass.

“Damn it!” John growled.

Sherlock glanced up from the microscope at the omega by the sink. John’s back was turned towards him, but the detective could see the tension and anger in the other man’s body. John’s shoulders were hunched. He had his elbows close to his sides in a protective stance. His head was bowed as he cursed again.

“Did you cut yourself?” Sherlock asked.

“No!” John set a mug in the draining rack harder than was necessary. It was amazing it didn’t break too. “The glass just slipped out of my hands.”

John had gathered the broken pieces and dumped them into the bin. He turned back to the sink and finished cleaning up after dinner.

“It’s not valuable. No reason to be upset.” Sherlock flicked his eyes back to the oculars on the scope. He adjusted the focal length to bring the slide into focus.

“I’m not upset!” John growled as he spun around and glared at Sherlock.

Sherlock suddenly felt like a small animal about to pounced upon by a predator. He quickly ran through his head everything he had done that day. _Had he forgotten an important anniversary? No. Had he left body parts anywhere he shouldn’t have? No._

Sherlock paused for a moment and replayed the day. They got up and went to St. Bart’s. Met with Molly. John talked to her while Sherlock worked in the chemistry lab. John was fine at lunch. Then they saw the agent watching the flat. John left and the agent followed him while Sherlock observed. They had the confrontation in the alley then Lestrade called them to a scene.

Sherlock blinked. John was angry at the scene. He refused to assist Sherlock and glared at him the whole time. Why hadn’t he noticed that before. Something happened at the crime scene.

“John, you seem displeased. Was it Anderson? He really did make a hash of the crime scene today.” Sherlock hoped he wasn’t the cause of John’s ire.

“Anderson?! Anderson?!” John’s voice was taking on a shrill quality to it that informed Sherlock, he was wrong.

John glared at Sherlock’s confused and shocked face for several more moments before he stomped off and flopped down in his chair.

_‘So not Anderson.’ _Sherlock said to himself. He slowly stood up and went to his chair. He sat down and watched as John tried to read his book. The man was growing more agitated as he sat. He knew Sherlock was watching him and it seemed to make John angrier.

“If it wasn’t Anderson, can I presume you might be disappointed in me?”

John slammed to book shut with a loud bang. “I wouldn’t use the word disappointed, you dick.”

Sherlock pressed his lips together. John hadn’t been this angry since he had returned from his time tracking down Moriarty’s network. The time when John thought he was dead.

Something clicked in the back of his mind. “Is this about Benjamin faking his death?”

“Good, very good.” John leaned back in his seat but continued to glare at Sherlock.

“It was the only . . .”

“Don’t you dare say it was the only way to keep Bond safe. I don’t want to hear that again. It didn’t work when you left me, and I sincerely doubt it will work this time either. How can you fuck’n Holmes be so stupid?”

Sherlock looked surprised. “We’re not stupid.”

Sherlock could see John fighting back his emotions. John was angry but he was also hurt. It caused Sherlock to feel physical discomfort himself. He didn’t understand and he didn’t like it.

“John, it can’t just be Benjamin and this spy.”

John sighed and Sherlock could hear the man grind his teeth. “It’s not.”

“Then please explain to me. I need to understand.”

“It brought back memories.” John quickly wiped the first tear from his cheek.

John’s tears always made Sherlock feel so inadequate. He hated when he had cause John any distress.

“When I had to leave?” Sherlock asked in hush tones.

“You didn’t just leave, Sherlock. You made me watch. You made me think I didn’t matter to you. That you didn’t care.”

It had been difficult to regain the doctor’s trust and affection when Sherlock had returned. It was only after months of reassuring John that something like the ‘Fall’ would never happen again, did John even agree to start seeing Sherlock again.

“I cared, John. That is why I left. I needed to protect you. I thought you understood. I thought you said you forgave me.”

“I do forgive you. And I know it is ridiculous to bring this up now but knowing that Benjamin has done the same thing you did made it all raw again. The least you could have done is let me know that you were alive. Not make me grieve for you. Do you even know how horrible it was for me? Believing you were dead? Having to watch you kill yourself? I can’t imagine what Benjamin put that agent through. Did Benjamin make him watch too?” 

“I didn’t have any other options but to fake my death. I had to do what I thought was best for you. I’m sure that is what Benjamin is trying to do too. He is trying to protect that alpha.”

“Bond doesn’t look like he needs protecting from anyone. And is Benjamin going to tell Bond about the baby? I thought Benjamin left because the alpha didn’t want anything to do with him and their child. I see I was misinformed about that too.”

Sherlock leaned back into his chair. He had made the mistake of putting his brothers in front of John’s needs again. He felt horrible.

“I did deceive you about Moriarty and my plan to fake my death. For that I will be eterally sorry, John. But I didn’t mean to harm you with Benjamin’s plan. He is pregnant – unplanned – and he felt it would be better for Bond to not know of the child. Some ridiculous rule about agents having leverage used against them. But the real reason that Benjamin left was he was in fear of his life.”

“From Bond?” John asked. Suddenly, on the defensive.

“No. Benjamin thought someone was murdering computer experts around the world.” Sherlock said.

John studied Sherlock for several seconds. “But you don’t believe so.”

“No, there is nothing connecting the deaths other than the fact they were leading executives in their agencies.”

John thought for a moment. John shifted in his chair and brought his arm up. He rested his head in his hand; his index finger extended and tapped lightly on his temple. 

“Pregnancies do occasionally cause psychological aberrations.”

“I don’t believe my brother is crazy.” Sherlock dismissed the comment. “But neither do I believe his life is in danger. But that is neither here nor there. What is important right now is your psychological wellbeing.”

John gave a weak smile and huffed.

“I said I forgave you. It is just not something I can forget. It will always be a painful subject, Sherlock.”

Sherlock paused for a moment. He would do anything to reassure John of his importance to him.

“You know with forgiveness there comes this very interesting custom of reciprocating physical pleasuring to insure mutual reconciliation.”

John stared at him for a moment, then his eyes twinkled. “Are you trying to suggest ‘makeup sex’?”

John was please to see a slight blush come to the stoic alpha’s complexion.

“I believe that might be the more common term for the encounter.”

John closed his eyes and tipped his head over the back of the chair. He let out a long slow breath.

“Sherlock . . . sex won’t solve everything.”

Stung slightly by John’s comment, Sherlock refused to give up. He slipped from his chair and knelt in front of the omega. His hands slowly moving up John’s thighs made the blonde open his eyes and look down at him.

“Sex won’t solve it, but if you will let me show how important you are to me. How much I deeply love you. Let me worship you and prove to you there will never be any reason to doubt me again.”

John reached out and cupped Sherlock’s face with his palm.

“I never doubted you, love.”

“Then come with me to our bed and let me make love to you.”

John let out a sound that was halfway between a laugh and a sob. He nodded his head and Sherlock surged up and kissed the omega’s firm lips.

“You’re an idiot.” John whispered between kisses.

“Occasionally.” Sherlock smiled back.

~Q~

Benjamin was washing up his dishes from lunch when he heard the knock on the door. He dried his hands and glanced out the window. He could only see the visitor’s shoulders and torso, but he knew who it was. Only his brother would dress in a trim dark brown wool suit to visit the country.

“Mycroft, what brings you down here?” Benjamin asked as he opened the door.

Mycroft smiled and took a brief moment to look at his younger brother.

Benjamin looked paler. His cheeks were hollow and there were dark circles under his eyes.

“You are not taking care of yourself, Alcott.”

Benjamin sighed and stepped back so his brother could enter the house. “I told you I prefer Benjamin.”

“Alcott is a very suitable name.” Mycroft said as he ducked through the small door. “You were named for our great, great, grandfather, Admiral Alcott Blaise Holmes. He fought against the Chinese in the Second Opium War.” 

“Not a military action to be proud of.” Benjamin said as he closed the front door firmly.

“He increased commerce and helped establish Hong Kong as a British territory.”

“He helped legalize the opium trade.”

Mycroft pouted as he looked around the sitting room of the cottage. He glared at one of Benjamin’s cat that was sitting on the most comfortable chair in the room, an overstuffed armchair upholstered in chintz. Mycroft picked the cat up and held him out at arm’s length, before dropping him on to the floor. Mycroft quickly sat down in the vacated chair, leaving Benjamin to sit down in a straight back wooden chair that would aggravate his back pain.

“You are still not taking care of yourself.” Mycroft said as he studied Benjamin’s face.

“Don’t believe the experts when they tell you that morning sickness stops after the first trimester.” Benjamin said. Mycroft looked repulsed by the comment. Benjamin smiled. “So why are you here?”

Benjamin wanted to change the subject quickly. He hadn’t been taking care of himself. He had lost weight and couldn’t bring himself to cook let alone eat anything.

“Mummy and Daddy want to see you.” Mycroft said looking affronted.

“Are they coming here?”

“No.” Mycroft sniffed. He knew how much his mother despised the cottage. “Mummy is insisting on you returning to London.”

“I can’t.” Benjamin said. His hand went to cover the round bulge of his tummy. Mycroft’s eyes followed the movement.

“Traveling at this point in a pregnancy is not forbidden.”

“That is not the problem and you know it. What about MI6?” Benjamin asked.

“Dealt with. But your agent has been making a bother of himself.”

“James?” Benjamin looked sick. “What did he do?”

“He accosted Sherlock and his doctor.” Mycroft still didn’t like the idea of John.

“Oh, God! Was anyone hurt?” Benjamin wasn’t sure who should be more frightened for.

Mycroft smiled remembering how angry Sherlock had been and John Watson still rubbing the bruises on his knuckles.

“Nothing severe. I believe I made my opinion clear to Mallory. Bond will be sent out of London for the next few months. You may return without any concern of being spotted by the man.”

“You know it is not just James. Anyone from MI6 could spot me. I can’t. There is too much chance of someone seeing me.”

“Benjamin, you are being foolish. It’s been three months. No one other than Bond has looked for you. And I’ve handled Bond. Our parents want to see you. Daddy especially. You are the first to give them a grandchild. And probably the only one to do so. It is only appropriate for you to return to London and allow them to be part of this with you.”

Benjamin frowned and stood up. He walked to the window and glanced out at the green garden and the farmland beyond the edge of the cottage property.

“Are you sure it is safe?” Benjamin asked as his hand slowly stroked over this abdomen.

“I’ve read the report from America and the one from the FSB. I can understand why you are upset, but I don’t think there is an immediate danger. Besides, to the world, Alcott Benjamin Winston Holmes is dead. No one will be looking for you in Mayfair.”

“There’s been a third murder.” Benjamin said. “Paris, Moreau Daquin. He was the head of their Technical Support Services. The French secret service equivalent to MI6’s Quartermaster.”

“Are you certain? How did it happen?” Mycroft was wondering why his own team hadn’t notified him about the man’s death.

“Mugging on the street.”

Mycroft frowned. He realized it was highly improbable that three executives from three different secret service agencies unexpected deaths wouldn’t be connected but it was even lesser odds that the three were done by the same individuals.

“People are mugged every day in Paris. Depressed Russians are known to commit suicide. And as horrible as the thought can be, home invasions take place in Arlington, Virginia. Benjamin, you are being overly concern to the point of paranoia. No one is targeting you and your child. I have made certain of that.” 

Benjamin kept looking out the window. Mycroft waited quietly.

“I miss Daddy.” Benjamin said. “I know he wanted to be part of this pregnancy.”

“You were always his favorite.”

Benjamin turned at looked at his brother. “It wasn’t my choosing.”

“Sherlock and I know that, Benjamin. We understand.” Mycroft bowed his head, then stood up and went to his younger brother. “We are very protective of you. Not just our father, but also myself and even in his selfish way, Sherlock. Ever since you were a young pup, you brought that out in us. You even allowed us to be protective of you when you sincerely didn’t need to. I thank you.”

Mycroft fought the urge to reach out for the omega. He lifted his chin and stretched his neck, subtly.

“Benjamin, trust me when I say, we will not allow anyone to harm you or your child. If you feel you cannot depend on MI6, know in your heart, you can depend on your family.”

Benjamin stared at his brother for a moment then brushed a tear from the corner of his eyes.

“I do trust you, Mycroft. But so much is at stake.”

“I know, and I will do everything to keep you safe.”

Benjamin turned and glance out the window again. “Can I bring my cats?”

Mycroft hummed as he looked down at the two cats sitting on his father’s antique Persian rug.

“If you must.”

“I must.” Benjamin turned and smiled at his older brother. “Can you drive me back?”

“That is why I made the trip today.”


	8. The Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bond is given a mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note there is a description of burned remains in this chapter. It is not as graphic as the real thing but could still cause some discomfort.

June 2019

Bond received the summons to return to MI6. He walked into building dressed in one of bespoke suits and Italian leather shoes, but he still had the shakes from too much alcohol and too little sleep for the past few days. His eyes were red and the dark bruise on his face couldn’t be covered up. He walked into M’s outer office and saw Eve Moneypenny typing at her computer. She glanced up at the man and frowned.

“You look terrible.”

“Thank you for the compliment.” Bond said as he adjusted his knotted tie.

“When was the last time you ate something, or are you sticking to your liquid diet?”

“I didn’t know you cared.” He said as he glanced at the closed door for M’s private office.

“James, we all care. I realize it was supposed to be a secret, but we knew the two of you were . . .” She glanced away. 

“We were what?” Bond’s eye flashed with bright anger.

“He was special to you. You were special to each other.” Eve said looking back up at Bond.

He was going to say something cutting, but he couldn’t. Of course, they all knew, regardless of how much Q wanted to keep it a secret. It was a building full of bloody spies. How in the world could they keep a secret like that from everyone?

The door to M’s private office opened and Tanner stepped out. He paused at the open door when he saw Bond.

“007, very good of you coming in so quickly.” He said.

Bond wanted to say something like _‘I didn’t have much choice after the command I was given.’_ But he didn’t.

“M is waiting for you.” Tanner said as he backed up and allowed room for Bond to enter the office.

M was sitting behind his desk. He was not wearing his suitcoat. It was hung across the back of one of the chairs. M’s white shirtsleeves were rolled up, exposing his forearms. The scars from cigarette burns were visible on the inside of his forearms. One of the several reminders of Mallory’s time held by the IRA.

He glanced up and saw Bond entering with Tanner. The man sighed heavily and carefully set his pen down. He appeared flustered and there were numerous files spread across his desk. The haggard man glanced as Bond walked towards one of the chairs.

“Don’t waste time sitting, Bond. This will be short.” M said cuttingly.

Bond stood up straight and prepared himself to be yelled at.

“What are you playing at?” M snapped at him.

“I do not know what you are talking about.” Bond said calmly.

“I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about. I have received one phone call from Whitehall, two from the Foreign Office, and one from Downing Street. I expect the next one will be from the Palace. What did you do to the Holmes?” M’s face was turning red.

“I only gave my condolences to the Quartermaster’s brother, Sherlock.” Bond said innocently.

“Who? Oh, that one.” M said sounding confused for a moment. He shuffled the papers on his desk briefly and then looked back up at Bond. “You shouldn’t have been speaking to any of them. They requested their privacy.”

“It was only a brief encounter on the street, sir. Nothing more.” Bond wondered how much M really knew about Bond’s meeting with Sherlock Holmes.

“Well, Mycroft Holmes has made his displeasure known. He wants you shipped out of the country.”

Bond shifted uncomfortably on his feet. He couldn’t discover what had happened if he was sent away on another mission. Regulations required he be allowed a minimum of three months off after such a long and in-depth mission he had just been on, but if Holmes was as important as Mallory was making him out to be, Bond could be leaving tonight.

“And you said?”

Mallory glared. “I said that was impossible.”

Bond took a second to try and read Mallory’s mind. He realized Mallory was studying him; looking for something is Bond’s expression.

“I informed Mister Holmes that he was not in the position to dictate where and when I send my agents out. I also informed him that you were required to remain in England for the next three months.” Mallory continued. “He allowed he didn’t feel the need for you to remain in London for those three months. He wants you gone. I don’t know what you said or what you did, but you have kicked a hornet’s nest.”

Bond nodded. “It wasn’t my intentions to offend the Holmes.”

“I’m sure it was your intention.” Mallory snapped. “And you were very successful. I know Mycroft Holmes. He wouldn’t be personally involved in castigating you unless you uncovered something important. He is doing everything short of having you arrested or assassinated to stop you. What have you found out about the Quartermaster?”

Bond took a moment to think. _What had he found out?_

“Absolutely nothing. Only that the Quartermaster was reported killed in an accidental fire at his flat.” Bond said.

“Do you think it was murder? Did Mycroft Holmes murder his brother?” Mallory asked.

“I don’t know. I don’t believe so.” Bond remembered Watson’s reaction. His face still had the bruise from the doctor’s fist. “His death appears to have been hushed up. Everything around it, including where he was buried. There may not have even been a funeral.”

“Interesting.” Mallory said as he finally seemed to calm down. He leaned back in his chair and stared off into the middle distance. Bond and Tanner waited. After several seconds, Mallory nodded his head as he came to a private decision. “Very good. I’ve had my doubts ever since the first reports came through. I didn’t like the fact that the only way we could identify the body was with DNA. Keep digging.”

Tanner stepped forward. “But sir, what about the Ice Man. He won’t be happy.”

“I’m sure Mycroft Holmes won’t be, but that doesn’t matter. If someone murdered the Quartermaster, I want to know. I want to make sure we don’t let anyone get away with killing one of our own.”

“Very good, sir.” Bond said calmly. He had a mission now. Find out what actually happened and take care of who was responsible for it. 

~Q~

Mallory and Tanner supplied Bond with everything they had on the Quartermaster’s death. Bond read through the investigative report three times. The first time, Bond couldn’t get past the description of the body. The photographs of the remains at the scene were included in the report. James held them as he stared at the charred remains. The body barely looked human. Blacken and deformed. The hair was burnt off and the scorched skin conformed to the shape of the skull. The facial features were melted, and frightening white bone was visible through the marred tissues. The arms were pulled tight to the chest with the hands in fists. ‘Pugilistic Posture’ was the term for the position of the body. James knew it was common in burn victims. It occurred when the fire caused the muscles to shrink and the joints to flex. Knowing the cause didn’t make the image any less horrific.

The second time he read through the report, he tried to focus on the description of the kitchen. The location of destroyed furniture and appliances. He tried to determine if anything was out of place or moved. Was something missing or something added. He didn’t find anything.

Most of Benjamin’s flat was destroyed in the explosion. The walls were blown out and the flats above and below suffered significant damage as well. The subsequent fire after the explosion razed what was left. Benjamin’s furniture and books were gone. The television set with all of the different game stations and CD players were melted. Benjamin’s bed with the ridiculously hard mattress; gone. Everything gone.

The third time he read through the report he tied to picture how the explosion happened and the path of the fire. The initial explosion in the kitchen. The damage to the stove and the kitchen counters. The body being thrown across the room and into the kitchen table. The fire that started in the kitchen and moved to the living room then the bedroom. The windows being blown out. The walls collapsing. The smoke and heat and destruction. It didn’t help. He still could not understand why Benjamin was dead.

Finally, exhaustion took over. Bond fell asleep. The photos of the charred body still clutched in his hands.

Bond rarely remember his dreams. Mostly they were of past missions. The sense of fear and anger. Being helpless to save himself. He rarely dreamed of his childhood or of ordinary things. He never dreamed of Benjamin. Never until tonight.

_Benjamin was sitting in front of him. They were sitting at a table in a room he didn’t recognize. It was plain and ordinary. There were many windows. There was a table between the two of them. He knew there was other furniture in the room, but he couldn’t see it. There was a window behind Benjamin and Bond could see green trees swaying outside. Morning sunlight was coming through the window and onto Benjamin’s youthful face. The light was making Benjamin squint his eyes slightly. He wasn’t wearing his glasses. He looked young. Younger than he did when they had first met. Benjamin’s hair was different too. It was short on the sides but a mound of curls on top. It made his face look thinner and more impish. _

_He was wearing one of his frumpy cardigans. His shirt was open at the neck and James could see love bites on the young man’s neck. It made him feel possessive and protective of the young omega. _

_Benjamin kept glancing to the left and to the right. He was embarrassed about something. He didn’t want to look Bond in the face. There was slight blush to his cheeks. _

_“What is it?” James asked. _

_“I can’t say it.” _

_“Yes, you can.” James teased back. _

_Benjamin turned and looked James in the face. A big smile on his face. _

_“I think I love you.” _

_James felt overwhelmed. He knew it was a dream. It had to be because he never remembered Benjamin saying that to him. He fought to stay in the dream. _

_“I love you, too.” He whispered. _

_Q smiled brighter. “You do?” _

_“Yes.” _

_Benjamin leaned forward and reached across the table and took James’ hand. “Don’t leave me.” _

_“Never.” _

_Suddenly, Benjamin was gone. James was standing in an open field, but the ground wasn’t dirt or grass. It was like tiles of slate. Grey and hard. A voice growled at him. _

_“Keep digging.” _

_Bond found a shovel was already in his hand. He started to dig. The slate wouldn’t move easily. He struggled. As soon as he moved some of the stones out of way, they slid back into the hole. He kept digging. When he looked up, he realized someone had placed a tombstone next to the hole he was digging. It was blank. There was no name, no date._

_Bond felt something move against his legs. He looked down expecting to see something reaching out of the hole to grab him, but all he saw was Benjamin’s two cats. _

_Another voice spoke. “You’ll find an empty hole when you are done.” _

Bond woke with a start. He sat up quickly and dislodged the file from his lap. The papers and photos fluttered to the floor. In his hand was the photo of the charred remains that had been identified at Benjamin Holmes.

Bond picked up the file and read the portions describing the contents of the flat above Benjamin’s. There was the damaged furniture and belongings. The description of explosion and burn pattern. Then there was a note about the location of the dead pet dog. A small Corgi who had been caught in the fire.

The voice came to him again and James recognized it as Sherlock Holmes’ “You’ll find an empty hole when you are done.”

Bond had one clear and precise thought. _‘Where are Benjamin’s cats?’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your kudos and comments.


	9. Welcome Home?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benjamin returns to London.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of emotion in this chapter.

June 2019

Mycroft Holmes lived in a Georgian style townhouse made of white limestone. There was a wrought iron fence between the street and the simple entrance. A highly polished brass carriage lamp hung over the black front door. A video camera was discreetly hidden in the base of the lamp. The tall windows on the ground and first floor were the classic divided light design. The facts that they were bullet proof and the front door was reinforced steel were well disguised.

Mycroft’s black Jaguar XE pulled into the garden in the back of the house. A simple circular drive behind tall brick walls. Mycroft’s butler was standing beside an open rear entrance, waiting for his employer’s arrival. When the butler noticed Benjamin in the car, he looked as if he smelled something bad.

As soon as the car stopped, the drive leapt out and opened the back door. Mycroft exited the car smoothly. Benjamin took more time to get out. Groaning slightly as his added bulk made it difficult for him to bend and shift.

“Good evening, Mister Holmes. Your parents are waiting for you in the front room, sir.” The butler said as he greeted Mycroft. He glanced at Benjamin and his growing belly. The older beta pulled the corners of his mouth down in a petulant frown. “Will we be expecting four for dinner tonight?”

Benjamin already began regretting returning to London.

“Yes, Sydney. Also have the guest room prepared. Young Mister Holmes will be staying with me indefinitely.” Mycroft said as he walked pass his butler.

“I didn’t agree to that.” Benjamin said as he struggled with the cat carrier. “I said for only a few days, then I’m returning to Sussex.”

Benjamin glanced at the butler. The older beta was shorter than Benjamin. His face was pasty white like melted candle wax. His neck seemed to ooze out of shirt with folds of skin. His pale hands were also pudgy; the fingers looking like undercooked sausages. He frowned at the cats. It was obvious the man didn’t want either Benjamin or his cats in the house. Benjamin never did like Mycroft’s butler. The man was very archaic in his opinions and maintained a strong bias against omegas. Benjamin could just imagine what the man thought of an un-bonded pregnant omega. The supposed ‘scandal’ it would bring to the household.

_‘Well, fuck you too.’ _Benjamin thought to himself as he looked at the sour expression on the butler’s face. Benjamin knew he had nothing to ashamed of. He held his head up and walked right pass the man. “I will only stay as long as I like and will leave when I choose.”

“I told you that the reason for you leaving London has been dealt with. You don’t need to hide in the country.” Mycroft said waving his hand to dismiss his brother’s complaint.

Benjamin felt a surge of anger slip through him. He had thought Mycroft would be more supportive and understanding, but he suddenly felt he had place to much faith in his brother’s rehabilitation from meddling.

Mycroft’s home was elegant and yet subdued. The main hallway that led from the front door to the back entrance had pale cream painted walls and a deep wine colour carpet. Crystal chandeliers lit the two-story tall hallway with bright white light and fleeting moments of rainbows. Dark cherry furniture dotted along the walls and a table with a vase of yellow and red Dahlias stood near the front door. The house reminded Benjamin of a funeral home.

Mycroft simultaneously opened the double doors opposite the cherry table. They opened into a large sitting room decorated with gold gilt Empire furniture and numerous antiques. A deep red Persian rug was spread out over a pale cream carpet. A large portrait of one of the Holmes’ ancestors hung over the marble mantle and fireplace.

“Mummy, Daddy, how lovely of you to be here when we arrived.” Mycroft tried and failed to keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

“Don’t be boring, Mycroft.” His mother snapped. She remained sitting in her armchair as Mycroft stepped forward and kissed her upturned cheek. “Where is he?”

Benjamin hovered near the door. He wanted to see his father but feared his mother more. “Mummy.”

Lydia Holmes eyes flashed at him. She had the same blue eyes as Mycroft. Cold and deep, like the ocean. She sat primly in her dark blue Chanel suit. The brass buttons shining as brightly as the gold gilt in the room. She was frowning, but Benjamin couldn’t really remember a time when she smiled at him.

“Don’t loiter, boy. Come here.” Lydia Holmes barked at her son.

Benjamin raised his chin defiantly and walk over to his alpha mother. She tilted her face up to him for the young man to kiss her. Benjamin gave her a polite if not sincere kiss to her cheek. Benjamin glance over to side where he knew his father would be hiding. Montgomery Benjamin Holmes was an omega too. He was tall and thin with thick grey hair that when he was younger had been just as dark and wavy as Benjamin's. His eyes were jade green and a warm inviting smile. Benjamin returned the smile and felt a weight lift from his shoulders.

Lydia’s dark blue eyes scanned over her youngest. “You’ve lost weight. That is not good for the pup.”

“I have been sick.” Benjamin said as he turned back to face his mother.

“Ridiculous. Your papa was sick too, but I made sure he gained adequate weight for a healthy pregnancy. Your alpha should be doing a better job.”

Montgomery cleared his throat loudly and Lydia seemed to catch herself.

“I apologize, Alcott. I miss-spoke. But you are still too thin. I will speak to Mycroft’s cook about an appropriate diet for you.”

“Please don’t.” Benjamin said. He knew he could never convince his mother to call him anything but her great grandfather’s name. “I’m not planning on staying here long.”

“What? Why?” Lydia asked looking at Mycroft.

Mycroft glanced at his younger brother. “I told you, Alcott, it has been settled. You need to stay here and be taken care of.”

“I am quite capable of taking care of myself.” Benjamin snapped. He swayed slightly. He head was beginning to hurt.

“I can see how well you have been taking care of yourself.” She turned to Mycroft. “We will need to discuss OBGYNs. I refuse to allow my grandchild to be born using a midwife. Alcott will be a Queen’s Hospital. We will have to come up with a reasonable explanation for the lack of an alpha. Maybe ‘in vitro’ . . . Alcott’s biological clock was ticking away. Or his silly notion of being a modern omega and wanting a baby but not a mate . . .”

Benjamin’s skin flushed with anger and he started to hear a ringing in his ears. He swayed more violently and thought he was going to tip over. Montgomery Holmes stepped closer to his son and gently wrapped his arm around Benjamin’s shoulders. The younger omega leaned slightly into his father’s embrace.

“Darling,” Montgomery said to his wife. “Why don’t you and Mycroft go and make the arrangements for Alcott. We’ll just sit here and wait for you, if that is alright with you.”

Lydia smile in triumph believing she had convinced not only her husband but also her son that they needed her to take control of the situation. Mycroft held his hand out and Lydia took it to stand.

“Quite right. I will give the cook a menu for the week. That should get some color back into your cheeks. When you feel better you will return home with us. We can have the nursery set up at our home but I’m sure you will be obstinate and insist on the furniture yourself. Have you even thought about nannies? You will need one.” Lydia’s dark blue eyes twinkled in excitement.

_‘Nannies_?!’ Benjamin thought. He closed his eyes and placed his head in his hands. “I don’t feel very good.”

“Here!” Montgomery guide Benjamin to the couch and sat down beside his son. Montgomery looked up at Lydia and Mycroft. “You two go and deal with the arrangements. Leave us alone to talk.”

Mycroft wondered if he should stay, but his mother was already off. She was calling for Sydney. Mycroft wondered how many orders she was going to give the man before he should intercede.

Benjamin leaned back into the soft couch. He still felt light-headed and dizzy. Montgomery stayed right beside his son. His arm wrapped protectively around Benjamin’s shoulders.

“She does that to me all the time.” Benjamin whispered.

“She is overwhelming at times, but she does mean well.” Montgomery said with a hint of humor in his voice.

“Really? I always feel like she thinks I’m a burden. That I can’t do anything for myself.”

“You must remember, Muppet, she’s from another generation. Her parents were an arranged bonding. They didn’t raise her with the idea of independent omegas. Of omegas getting educations or jobs. She’s come a long way from her parents.”

“I had to fight to get an education. She still thinks I was a secretary. She is a chauvinist.” Benjamin said accusingly.

“She let you move out and get your own flat. I think she has come a long way from her father and mother.”

“Dad, I was twenty-six. Of course, I was going move out.” Benjamin said as he looked up into his father’s eyes. “I don’t know why you stay with her.”

A shadow passed over Montgomery’s face. He frowned and lowered his eyes but didn’t remove his arm from around his son’s shoulders.

“Because after everything, I still love her.” Montgomery sighed. “What happened between your mother and I is just between us. Don’t judge me for forgiving her after her affair. Those months I spent in the cottage alone were very difficult. And it was just easier to forgive her than to remain angry.”

“I’m sorry. And I know why you couldn’t visit me there, but why is she being so demanding now.” 

“She thinks we have failed at being good parents. That if she hadn’t let you leave and get a job, then you wouldn’t be pregnant and unbound now. She thinks if I hadn’t encouraged you then you would have been at home and under her protection.”

Benjamin groaned and tipped his head back of the edge of the couch again. “You mean under her thumb. I’m sorry, dad. But I feel like I’m being buried.”

“I know. No one ever claimed alphas were the most logical thinkers in the world.” Montgomery smiled at his son again. “Is that the reason you’ve excluded the alpha from this pregnancy?”

Benjamin suddenly flushed with embarrassment. He had pointedly refused to tell his family the real reason he had excluded James Bond from the knowing he was going to have a child.

“Is it because you don’t want to have an alpha telling you how to live your life or is it because of your mother and me? Our relationship?” Montgomery asked.

Benjamin’s eyelids blinked several times before he calmed his heart rate enough to speak. “No.”

“No? Then why isn’t he here? Is he such a bully you don’t want him here?”

“No.” Benjamin whispered. “He’s really not. It’s just.”

Benjamin could feel his emotions flooding over him. He closed his eyes and bit the inside of his cheek. He blinked away tears. Memories flooded back.

_Benjamin opened the door of his flat and walked in. He closed and locked the door, allowing the messenger bag to slip from his shoulder as he did so. He was tired. Exhausted. It had been a long thirty-six hours working to track 006 through Thailand. The agent had disappeared for a while after he had blown up a heroin manufacturing plant masquerading as a fireworks warehouse. The resulting explosion was massive and took out not only the building but several hundred feet of forest surrounding the isolated building. _

_Trevelyan was seen driving away in a jeep. The satellites followed him into the dense jungle. Benjamin did not stay in contact with the agent until he was certain the man would make his rendezvous with the extraction team._

_All Benjamin wanted to do now was crawl into bed and sleep. He took two steps into his dark flat when Bond spoke. _

_“You’re late.” His voice was dark and angry. _

_“Did we have a date?” Benjamin asked. _

_As soon as the words left his mouth, he knew he made a mistake. Bond and he had only been seeing each other away from work for six weeks. Neither one had said the word ‘dating’ let alone the word ‘relationship’. Benjamin wasn’t sure what exactly they were doing. It felt so good and yet so very tenuous. He was frightened that at any moment Bond would decide he had had enough of the omega and move on. _

_Bond didn’t answer Benjamin. The silence drew out. Benjamin stepped towards the end table and leaned over to turn the lamp on. Suddenly, as fast as a snake strike, Bond’s hand reached out and grabbed Benjamin’s wrist. _

_“Don’t” he whispered. “I want it dark.” _

_“Alright,” Benjamin whispered back. “Did something happen?” _

_Fear surged through Benjamin’s mind. He didn’t know what was going on. He didn’t know why Bond was acting so strangely. _

_“It’s an anniversary.” He said. “In the past, I made sure I was always on a mission. I requested to be gone. I needed to be so deep in blood and pain that I couldn’t remember.” _

_Benjamin’s mind quickly ran through Bond’s file. What had occurred in his past? What was so horrible he didn’t want to remember?_

_“But fucking Mallory said there weren’t any missions on the board. He gave Thailand to Alec instead of me.” _

_“You wanted to go to Bangkok? Why?” _

_“I wanted to kill someone. Anyone. As a memorial to her.” _

_Benjamin latched onto that bit of information. ‘Her’. There had only been two women who had greatly affected Bond’s life. Olivia Mansfield, who died in his arms at Skyfall, and Vesper Lynd._

_With that thought, everything fell into place. _

_“Vesper? You loved her greatly.” _

_Bond growled at the name. “I hate her.” _

_Benjamin knew James was lying as much to himself as he was to him. _

_“I don’t know much about her other than she was involved in the Le Chiffre Affair. She worked with you.” Benjamin had read the complete file but knew there was more about the mission than was in the file. _

_“She betrayed me.” _

_“She died, James.” _

_“Don’t you think I know that!?” Bond’s shouted and then lunged at Benjamin. _

_It happened so fast the young man didn’t have time to react. Together, the two crashed to the floor. Benjamin pinned underneath James. The alpha’s hands pressing Benjamin’s shoulders down to the floor. Bond straddling Benjamin’s hips and holding him in place. _

_The streetlight outside was the only illumination in the room. The limited light casted awkward shadows across James’ face; making him look like a monster. Benjamin could see the anger in James’ face. The pain and violence James could cause. Benjamin gasped but didn’t fight. He didn’t turn away. _

_Frozen underneath the agent, Benjamin watched as James’ anger ebbed slowly away. It was as if James finally realized who he had trapped under him. James’ hand slowly came up and smoothed down Benjamin’s face. His fingertips lightly grazing across Benjamin’s cheek._

_“She was beautiful.” He whispered. _

_The statement twisted inside Benjamin. _

_“I wanted . . .” James started then glanced away. He sat back on his heals. “I thought we could have more. We could be . . . normal.” He lifted himself off Benjamin and started to pace around the room. _

_Slowly Benjamin got off the floor and slunk back onto the couch. “You resigned?” _

_“I sent my resignation to M. I learned later she deleted it.” The tension in James’ voice was palpable. “We decided to leave together. We were going to start new, fresh. I wanted so much. I thought we could leave all this and maybe . . . maybe we could have a family.” _

_Benjamin felt like he had swallowed at bolder. His stomach twisted. He knew James loved the woman, he just didn’t know how much he loved her and how much he wanted with her. _

_“Then she betrayed you.” Benjamin whispered._

_“She killed herself. She wouldn’t let me save her. Every dream I had, every moment I want to have with her was taken away. I knew then I could never leave. I would never have what others had.” _

_“James, never is a big word, but it is often wrong.” _

_He laughed sardonically. “If I had a lover, a mate, how long would I have to wait until they were killed too. Why would I want children knowing they would be targeted? Why would I set myself up to be torn apart again?” _

_Benjamin felt the sting of tears forming in his eyes. “Why did you come here, James?” _

_The blonde turned and looked at Benjamin. James’ face was still stoic and unreadable, but there was confusion then sadness in his eyes. _

_“I wanted to come here and fuck you so hard I wouldn’t remember. I wanted you to help me forget.” _

_Benjamin fought to keep his voice calm as he blinked the tears away. _

_“I don’t think I can do that. I don’t think anyone can.” _

_James stared at Benjamin for another few seconds, then turned and left the flat. Benjamin didn’t hear from him again until a week later. A box of expensive tea arrived onto his desk with a simple note. _

_“I’m sorry. J” _

_That night they slept together again. _

Benjamin returned to the room with his father. His heart still breaking from James’ words.

“The father of my child is a great man, but he can’t be a good man. He needs to do horrible things to keep us safe. Not just me and the baby but everyone. He is very good at what he does. And because of it, he could never be the type of man who would want a family or a bond mate. I knew that when we first slept together. It didn’t matter to me then and still doesn’t now. I know James. I know what he is and who he is. And I admire him for it. But I can’t put him in the position to have to change himself for me.”

Montgomery tipped his head back and studied his son’s expression. “Sounds like he would be a wonderful alpha for my grandchild.” 

“I think you would like him too. I know you would find him as intriguing as I do, but that doesn’t make it a good idea to include him in our child’s life. He has enemies. Enemies who would use this baby against him. And he has a job to do. That if he acknowledged our baby he would no longer be allowed to do. And finally, he was hurt before. Not by me but someone else who betrayed him. I don’t think he can love again because of her.”

“He couldn’t even love you and his child?” Montgomery asked quietly.

“It would kill me to know the answer is no, so I choose not to even ask the question. It is better to never know and have the glimmer of hope it could be something else.” Tears slowly rolled down Benjamin’s face.

“Son, you are more than worthy of being loved. And even though, we seem to be surround by people who don’t know how to show it properly, you are. I will respect your decision although I feel you are not being logical about it.”

Benjamin wiped his face and wrapped both of his arms around his father’s neck; giving the older omega a strong hug.

“I want my child to know you. I want him to grow up knowing his grandpa.” Benjamin said.

“I’m not going anywhere, Muppet. I promise.”


	10. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benjamin has a bad day.

July 2019 

The first night in London, Benjamin had to leave the dinner table early. He couldn’t sit quietly and listen to Mycroft and his mother proceed to plan his and his child’s lives. The second day, his mother handed him a list of three names of prominent OBGYNs. Benjamin reached for his laptop and did a quick computer search on each man. Systematically dismissing each doctor as unacceptable. Lydia frowned and called Benjamin unreasonable. The third day, she brought cloth swatches and paint chips for Benjamin to choose from for the nursery at the Holmes estate. Benjamin cursed and threatened.

“Would you like to see what I do when someone is foolish enough to make me angry?”

Mycroft flinched. He quickly escorted Lydia and Montgomery from the room, remembering how difficult it was to regain access to his bank accounts after he had tried to block his brother’s employment with MI6. The utter mortification he had when he was informed he was going to be barred from the Diogenes Club for unpaid dues still made him shudder.

Mycroft explained to his infuriated mother that he would convince Benjamin to return home to their estate after he had calmed down.

“You remember how emotional omegas can be when they are pregnant.” He mollified his mother. “Just let me convince him it is his idea, then he will be happy to return to your home.”

Lydia Holmes glared at her oldest son and then at her husband. “You are quite right. All emotion and no logic. I expect to hear from you in a week. The nursery should be ready by then. I will make an appointment with Doctor Payne.”

“Yes, Mummy.” Mycroft said with a cynical undertone to his voice. If Benjamin heard their mother, he was certain they would return to find their house sold. Mycroft smiled. 

Benjamin and his two cats were sequestered in the guest room of Mycroft’s townhouse. Mycroft insisting the cats remain locked in the bedroom and not be permitted free roam of his house. Arthur, a grey British Shorthair, was curled in Benjamin’s lap when Mycroft knocked softly on the door.

“Unless you’re here to apologize, go away.” Benjamin shouted at the door. Arthur hissed and dug his crawls into Benjamin’s leg.

Mycroft opened the door. “May I come in?” he asked.

“Where is she?”

“In route to the Holmes Estate. They left less than an hour ago.”

“That means they are still within the London area. Still too close.” Benjamin returned to petting the cat.

Mycroft allowed himself a small smile before moving further into the room.

“I am leaving for a summit in Stockholm. I’m flying out tomorrow, as I need to be rested before it starts. You will have the house to yourself for a few days.”

Benjamin glanced up. “To myself? You mean, me, two maids, a cook, a dozen security guards, and that narrow-minded butler.”

“Only four guards, and don’t forget your cats. Besides, Sydney is not narrow minded, just - unswerving.” Mycroft glowed.

Benjamin rolled his eyes.

“I will return next Monday. By then Daddy should have convinced Mummy that you need to stay here with me.”

“I will not be staying here with you. When you return, I want to go back to the cottage. It seems to be the only place where I can get some peace.”

“Benjamin, you will find as much peace and quiet as you could want here. I promise to stay out of your way and will grant you your privacy.” Mycroft said trying to sound sincere.

Benjamin rolled his eyes again. “Sure.”

“Besides, you do need assistance even if you won’t admit it. You haven’t been taking care of yourself, have you. You look ghastly. You are seven months along, have you even seen an obstetrician?”

Benjamin glanced out the window to hide his embarrassment. “I couldn’t while I was here in London, and I didn’t have the opportunity to find one in Lewes.”

Mycroft winced. As charming and quaint as Lewes was, it probably didn’t have a wide selection of qualified physicians. Well, not as wide or as qualified as their mother would prefer.

“I can have Anthea do a search . . .” he started.

“I will find my own doctor.” Benjamin snapped.

“Then do it. You don’t have an endless amount of time, brother dear. Your time is running out.” Mycroft snipped back.

“I will find one today.” Benjamin said. 

Mycroft slowly nodded his head. “Thank you. I expect to see a report from your physician upon my return.”

Benjamin turned back and glared at his brother. “So much for respecting my privacy.”

“I only want to make sure you and my future niece or nephew are doing well. You can’t expect me to completely abandon you during your pregnancy.”

“I am a grown man. I did have a very important job at one time. I was responsible for dozens of lives and millions of pounds. I am more than capable to dealing with my own pregnancy.”

This time it was Mycroft who rolled his eyes. “No one has said otherwise.”

“You just acted like it.” Benjamin quickly injected into the conversation.

Mycroft glared as he was interrupted by his younger brother.

“No one believes you are incapable of handling your pregnancy. We just want to make it easier for you. Whether you accept it or not, you are cared for. You are loved by your family.”

The words pressed down on Benjamin’s chest. He knew in their own perverse way the Holmes were just trying to help. It just always felt like interference and manipulation.

“Believe it or not, Mycroft, I’ve heard you. I always hear you, but that still doesn’t mean it is what is best for me. For me!” Benjamin stepped away from his brother and went to the window to look out.

“We are trying to do what is best for you – for you and your child.”

“And you would know what is best because of your long history of being an omega?” Benjamin turned at looked at his brother. “Or maybe it is because you know what it like to be pregnant and afraid for your life? I know, it’s because our parents set such a wonderful example of how loving and devoted alphas and omegas can be to their pups.”

Mycroft sighed. He wanted to say more but he could see it was useless when Benjamin was so upset.

“We will talk when I return from Stockholm. If you need anything, just ask Sydney. I will instruct him to follow your wishes.” Mycroft tugged slightly on hem of his waistcoat. He turned to leave but paused for a moment by the door. He turned back and looked at his brother. “Benjamin, you are loved you know. And not just by our father.”

Benjamin couldn’t help himself. Hot tears slipped from his jade green eyes and down his cheeks. They made Mycroft feel completely ineffectual. He turned and left quickly.

~Q~

The day Mycroft left for Stockholm Benjamin informed the staff that his cats had full run of the house.

“But Mister Holmes won’t be happy,” Sydney quickly argued.

“Did my brother inform you my wishes would be followed?”

“Yes, but I’m sure he only meant what you wanted to eat or allowing visitors.”

Q tried to not let the anger slip into his voice. “I assure you, my brother meant all of my wishes not just the ones you think merit your attention.”

Sydney looked as if he had stepped in something the neighborhood dogs had left in the garden. Benjamin wondered how the man could pull the corners of his mouth that low.

“As you wish, Master Alcott.”

Benjamin growled. ‘Master’ was a condescending term for an adolescent male. Benjamin was almost thirty-one. He could see Sydney was waiting for Benjamin to say something. To get angry and act like the supposedly immature, flighty omega the beta believed he was.

Benjamin remained as calm as he could even though he wanted to punch the man in the face.

“That is all, Sydney. You may leave.” Benjamin said in a dismissing tone. He turned his attention back to his computer.

The butler waited a moment, disappointed there wasn’t a scene. He regained his superior attitude and turned to leave. Just as his hand touched the doorknob, Benjamin spoke.

“And from now on, you will address me as Mister Holmes. Do try and remember that.”

Benjamin could hear the gritting of the man’s teeth.

“Yes, sir.”

The door didn’t slam, but it closed more firmly than was required.

Benjamin smiled. For the first time in a long time, he found himself enjoying himself.

He returned his attention back to hacking into the Sûreté. He read the report on Moreau Daquin of the French Secret Service. In April, the forty-eight-year-old man was walking in the park with his dog, when he appeared to have been mugged. Shot with a small caliber weapon. His wallet and watch were taken. The dog was left alive. His leash was still clutched in the hand of his dead owner. There were no witnesses and no clues to who the murder could be.

Mycroft’s condescending voice came to Benjamin’s mind. _“There is nothing to connect the murders together.” _

“There has to be,” Benjamin whispered to himself.

He spent the next couple of hours scouring the internet and hacking into various networks trying to find a single thread that would connect the three men. He wanted to hack into the various spy agencies, but he couldn’t. At this moment he wished he had the computing strength of the MI6 servers, but that was an impossibility. He had to rely on his laptop.

He noticed that Daquin had just published a paper online regarding the lack of security of various information gathering networks. Not secret services but agencies like National Health and Treasury departments. That reminded Benjamin of something. It took another twenty minutes until he found a report to the EU Parliament regarding an increase in hacking into governmental agencies by a yet unknown group of hackers. The report was written by Dimitri Popovs. The Russian FSB executive who committed suicide.

Benjamin sat staring at the screen when he was interrupted by a knock on the door. The sound made him jump slightly in his chair.

“What?!” he growled.

The door opened and a disgruntled Sydney said. “You have a visitor.”

Benjamin blinked. “A visitor? No one knows I’m here except my parents and they wouldn’t be back so soon.”

“He is on Mister Holmes’ ‘acceptable’ list of visitors,” Sydney said with a deep tone of disdain.

“Oh, just shut up and let me in.” John Watson pushed his way pass the beta butler and into the room.

Benjamin was surprised to see the other omega there. He was relieved it wasn’t his parents.

“Thank you, Sydney. And would you have cook send up tea please.” Benjamin said. His anger towards the snooty butler disappeared when he realized he would have someone – not his family – to talk to. “John, please sit down. How did you know I was here?”

“Sherlock, he said your parents wanted to see you and that you came back to town for them.” John hadn’t sat down. Nor had he made any friendly greetings towards the pregnant omega.

Benjamin could sense something was wrong. John kept his eyes fixed and glaring at him. It made him uncomfortable.

“Somethings wrong.” Benjamin said. “Oh, James! Did he contact you again?”

“So, it’s true.”

“What is?”

“That you purposefully faked your death and lied to the father of your child?” John’s voice took on a hard biting tone.

Benjamin felt sick. He hadn’t eaten much that day, but he thought he was going to vomit.

“John, you don’t understand.” Benjamin stepped back and collapsed into his chair.

John continued to stare but his doctor side began to assess the young man in front of him. He looked at Benjamin’s face, then his chest, and finally at his wrists.

“You’ve lost weight. Morning sickness bad?”

“Terrible.”

John stepped forward and took Benjamin’s wrist in his hand. His trained fingertips immediately found the young man’s pulse rate.

“It’s fast. When did you eat last?”

“I tried to eat some breakfast. Tea and toast. Lunch didn’t stay down.” Benjamin said as he noticed John’s attitude switched from being angry to that of a concerned doctor.

“Caffeine free tea?”

“Yes, but I threw it up within a few minutes of finishing.” Benjamin ducked his face.

“Have you been checking your blood pressure?” John asked.

“No.”

John looked at the back of Benjamin’s hand, then pinched the skin. The elastic skin was slow to bounce back into its normal shape.

“You’re dehydrated. Are you drinking water?”

“Some.”

“How much?”

“I don’t know, maybe eight ounces a day.” Benjamin shrugged.

“What has your doctor said? Are they prescribing anything for the ‘Morning Sickness’?”

Benjamin turned away. His hand reached up and his fingers started to play lightly on the keyboard of the laptop.

“I haven’t actually had the chance to find a doctor.” Benjamin hesitantly admitted.

John let out a long low breath. “Just like your brother. Obstetrics is not my specialty, but if you want, I can help you find a doctor.”

“I trust you further than Mycroft or my mother. You can’t imagine the ‘quacks’ they have recommended. Misogynistic everyone.”

“I can imagine. Remember, I went to medical school with them.” John gave a halting laugh while still carrying a grudge towards the narrow-minded bigots who felt an omega’s place was in the home and not in the surgical suite. John had to work twice as hard as his fellow alpha students to receive half the recognition. “I work with two very good OBGYNs at my clinic. I can ask them. Is there anything I need to tell them - warn them?”

“Just to avoid being alone with my mother and Mycroft.” Benjamin said.

“What about Bond?”

Benjamin glance up. His eyes were big and round. “I don’t know what you mean.” 

“You didn’t tell Bond, did you?” John asked.

“What makes you think that?”

“I met him. I actually punched him in the face for you.”

“You didn’t!”

“Yes, I did. He was following me. He asked about you. Well, that’s not true. He asked about how you died. Imagine my surprise to learn you were dead.”

John was relieved to see that Benjamin actually looked ashamed. John sat down.

“There was a good reason why I did it,” Benjamin sheepishly said.

“I can’t imagine what it could be. He seemed concerned about you, but he didn’t mention the baby. He doesn’t know does he?”

“No, no one from MI6 knows. They can’t.”

John watched Benjamin’s face. The young man’s face was open and easy to read. He would have made a terrible poker player.

“He seemed like the type to ask if he knew. He seemed like the type to care. He seemed to care a lot, Benjamin. I think you’re being idiot.”

The younger omega quickly wiped a tear from the corner of his eye. “I have my reasons.”

“I have very personally experience with the pain that a deception like this causes. I came very close to doing something very stupid because your brother thought he had a reason to lie to me and make me think he was dead.” John’s voice took on its hard edge again. “Unless you’re afraid of Bond, I can’t imagine a single reason why you would make him suffer like this.”

“Did he look okay? Did he make you think he might . . .” Benjamin couldn’t bring himself to say the words?

“I think he won’t give up. He won’t quit trying to figure out why you are dead.” John said. 

“Mycroft said he was sent out of London.”

“I didn’t get the impression that either Sherlock or Mycroft would stop Bond.”

“If things could be different, I would welcome it. If I could have been bonded to James and we could share this child together, then I would jump at the chance. But it can’t happen and wishing for it and hoping for it doesn’t change it.” Benjamin finally said.

The two men heard what sounded like a metal tray crashing to the floor, followed quickly by shouts. Benjamin recognized Sydney’s voice calling for someone to stop. John twisted and placed himself between the door and the pregnant omega.

“What do you think you are doing?! Guards!” They heard Sydney shout.

The door burst open and a man appeared in the doorway. He stopped and stared at the two omegas. His crystal blue eyes moved from their faces to Benjamin’s bulging abdomen. His face was unreadable and emotionless.

“Quartermaster.”

“007.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may have noticed the number of chapters for this story have increased. I'm simply not going to be able to finish this the way I want to in just 15 chapters. I hope you liked today's installment. Next one will be from James' point of view.


	11. What James Bond Saw

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James' point of view at learning Benjamin is alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought no one would want to wait to see how James handled the news that Benjamin was alive. This may not turn out the way you are expecting.

July 2019

Bond reviewed the report one more time. There was no mention of Benjamin’s cats in the flat. It was thin, ridiculously thin, but it was something. He thought of reasons why the cats wouldn’t be there. They had both died previously to explosion, but he thought Benjamin would have mentioned it to someone. No one knew anything about his cats. He thought maybe they were removed from the flat. But why would the cats be removed, and Benjamin left behind to die in the fire. He considered they could have escaped, but Benjamin was very careful with them. The only way they would escape was if a stranger allowed them to escape while they kept Benjamin from stopping them. A stranger who was sabotaging Benjamin’s gas line.

Since Mallory gave Bond the mission to discover what had happened to the Quartermaster, Bond had no problems asking for assistance from Q Branch. Bond went looking for Daniella. She had been Benjamin’s second in command, his R. She was an older woman who had been Bond’s handler when he first became an agent, and then later, when he was made a Double ‘O’.

Everyone including Bond thought Daniella was in line to follow Boothroyd as Quartermaster. As Bond walked into the department, he remembered a conversation he had with Benjamin late one night.

_“She didn’t want it.” Benjamin answered James’ question their over takeaway. _

_The evening was becoming the norm. They had been seeing each other for months now. Dinners out turned into frantic tumbles in bed turned into evenings sitting together in one of their flats sharing a meal together and talking. Later to be followed by slow and passionate lovemaking. _

_“Why not? I mean, I’m more than happy that you are my Quartermaster, but she had seniority.” James said as he speared another dumpling from the cardboard container. _

_“Yes, she did, but . . .” Benjamin looked sad for a moment. “It was because of Boothroyd.”_

_James remembered the dotty old Quartermaster, Major Desmond Boothroyd. He had been killed in the bombing of the MI6 headquarters in the Silva affair. _

_“Q Branch was the hardest hit in the bombing, you know.” _

_“I didn’t know.” James said quietly. When James returned from Greece, he only checked to see if any of the agents had been killed. He never did learn who the victims were. _

_“We lost seven people that day including the Major. Daniella was injured. Trapped under the rubble for over an hour. She was very distraught afterwards. She didn’t want to come back to MI6. She really wanted to quit. I begged her to return. I told her I needed her. She told me I was wrong, but she came back as an advisor with the understanding it was only until we got our feet back under us again.” Benjamin explained. _

_“But that was years ago. She is still here.”_

_Benjamin gave a weak smile. “I’m still taking advise from her. After six months, I made her R. She tried to refuse but everyone started calling her R and it stuck. She keeps telling me it’s only for a little bit longer, but I don’t think she will leave. She enjoys it too much to quit. Kind of like you.” _

_James didn’t say anything, but he agreed with Benjamin. He couldn’t imagine what his life would be like if he wasn’t an agent. He didn’t know what he would do._

Towards the end, there had many nights like that. Just the two of them doing nothing more than just talking. Bond thought he knew everything there was to know about the young Quartermaster. He knew the name of his cats and his favorite movies. He knew Benjamin like to read science fiction and was a ‘Doctor Who’ fan. He knew the omega’s favorite foods and how he sounded in the throes of passion. He thought he knew everything, until he realized he didn’t.

Pulled from his memories, Bond found Daniella staring a schematic with two of the minions at her side. She glanced up at him and frowned.

“We’re busy.” She said deadpan. The two techs looked at him with wide fearful eyes. The presence of a Double ‘O’ in Q Branch always made the techs nervous.

“I won’t take up much of your time.” He said as he stepped closer.

“You already are. Hurry up, what do you want?”

Bond felt slightly self-conscious that she was unwilling to flirt with him. But then again, he couldn’t remember the first time she had flirted with him. She was the only woman at MI6 who wouldn’t swoon at his mere presence. Maybe that was the reason that the Major insisted that she be his handler so many years ago.

“I need a tracker. Small, easy to conceal.” He said succinctly.

“For yourself, or someone else?” She asked.

“Someone else. He can’t know he is tagged.”

Daniella nodded her head. “TJ get the S-34, please.”

The red-headed minion to her left dashed off like an eager puppy to please their master. Daniella’s attention returned to the schematic and Bond stood there waiting awkwardly for TJ to return. He rocked slightly on his heels and glanced around the room. He wanted to push his hands into his pockets but refused to fidget.

TJ rushed back with a small plastic box. Bond held out his hand, but the red head handed the box to Daniella.

“Thank you.” She waved the two minions to leave. Turning towards Bond, she asked, “Will we be getting this back?”

“Probably not.”

“Then why should I give you a tracker that costs almost 800 pounds to produce?” she asked coolly. She had learned from the Major’s and Benjamin’s mistakes.

“Because Mallory would want you too.”

Daniella raised any eyebrow. “Is this official?”

“Nowhere near being official or even acknowledgeable.” Bond’s voice softened so no one but Daniella would hear.

“But M knows about this and gives consent?”

“Yes.”

Daniella looked down at the small box then up at Bond. “The Quartermaster?”

“You are the Quartermaster, Daniella.” Bond said.

“We all know that isn’t true. Tell me.”

Bond hesitated then said, “Yes.”

Daniella only took a moment to access the implications. “Alright, give me your mobile. I will download the apt you will need to use this. It will work in a ten-mile radius. Don’t let your target get too far ahead of you.”

Bond hand over his cell phone and Daniella quickly tapped several screens on it that Bond had never seen before.

“It’s here.” She pointed to an icon that looked like a compass point. “Click on it and it will pull up the location of the tracker on a map.”

“Will it transmit if he gets on the Tube?” Bond asked.

“The Tube?”

“My target impresses me as someone who wouldn’t waste money on taxis if he can avoid it.” Bond explained.

Daniella scowled for a moment. “Of course, it will work if he is on the Tube and you are not. But it cuts the distance down to five miles. So best to stay reasonably close to them.”

“Thank you, Daniella. You are a dear.” Bond leaned forward and kissed the older woman’s cheek.

Her cool expression didn’t change, but she grabbed Bond’s forearm and stopped the man from leaving.

“If your target had anything to do with the Quartermaster’s death, you make sure he regrets it.”

Bond looked into Daniella’s steely blue eyes. “With pleasure.”

~Q~

The tracker was a small black disc slightly larger than a pin head. Bond held in on the tip of his finger as he studied it. He couldn’t believe something this small would transmit let alone send accurate information regarding location. But if Benjamin designed it, then it worked.

There was something off about Watson’s reaction Bond decided. Watson seemed confused by the comment about Benjamin’s death. But he also punched Bond when he was referred to as ‘the alpha’. Not exactly sure what how it fit together with the cats missing, but Bond decided Watson would be a good place to start. He seemed far more emotional and less guarded than the brothers. If Bond could get him alone, away from Sherlock Holmes, and then try to scare him, maybe he would let something else slip.

Bond went to the clinic where Watson worked and waited for him. Since he learned that Watson was excellent at detecting a tail, Bond used all of his expertise in following the man. He wore the coveralls of a construction worker and wore a hat low over his forehead. He also stayed back and didn’t follow directly behind Watson.

John Watson left the clinic. He paused for a moment and scanned the area, just like he had done the first time Bond had seen him. After several seconds, Watson seemed satisfied and turned down the pavement. Watson walked straight from the clinic and into the Tube station. He used his Oyster card and fell into the mob of people heading down to the trains. It was ‘rush hour’ and the platforms were crowded. Bond hesitated and glanced around to see if anyone was watching him. He didn’t see anyone. Watson was only a few feet away from Bond with his head down looking at his mobile.

The train pulled in and the doors opened. For a few moments there was the push and shove of people getting on and off the train. The monotone voice over head reminded everyone to ‘Mind the gap’.

Watson stepped onto the train and reached up to grab on of the overhead hand holds. Bond moved closer. He took out the tracker and held it on the tip of his finger. As he moved pass Watson, he nudged into the man. Bond’s finger slid up under the edge of Watson’s collar. The tracker clung to the fabric of Watson’s shirt.

Watson twisted to the left to see who had jostled him, but Bond was already moving way to the right. He opened the connecting door and went into the next carriage. Watson turned to look the other way but only saw the mass of people. It could have been anyone. The doors closed and the train left the station.

Bond looked down at his mobile. A simple street map showed a small green dot moving, not on the roadways, but underneath them. He refused to look up and watch Watson, he kept attention on the mobile and on anyone standing near him.

Watson got off the train at the Green Park station. Bond followed Watson. He stepped into an alcove to remove the workman’s coveralls he was wearing. Now dressed in dark jeans and a navy-blue windcheater, Bond followed the man across Piccadilly Road and into Mayfair.

Bond stayed back losing visual contact with Watson as soon as he entered the area. Bond watched as the small dot followed the streets of Mayfair. Bond glanced around at the various houses. Each house was well in excess of twenty million pounds. Bond doubted any of the residents in this neighborhood would be needing an NHS doctor to make house calls. Besides, this was too far away from Watson’s clinic for it to be one of his routine patients.

Bond stayed back until the dot on his mobile stopped moving. Bond turned the corner just in time to see Watson enter a three-story townhouse with a wrought iron fence in front. Bond picked up his pace and hurried across the street. There was no name on the door of the building but there were numerous cameras around it. Bond looked up and down the street.

Deciding that a frontal assault would be the least expected, Bond walked up to the door. He used the polished brass door knocker. The door was immediately opened by a pudgy man who was several inches shorter than Bond.

“Yes?” He spoke with a refined public-school diction. His eyes traveled up and down Bond’s frame.

“Dr. Watson is expecting me.” Bond said as he pushed the door further open and entered the house.

“Excuse me, sir, but you need to wait here. Dr. Watson is occupied with Mister Holmes.” The shorter doughy man said affronted by Bond’s assertiveness.

Bond heard the name and anger blazed through him. _‘Mister Holmes.’_ Benjamin’s brother. The one who had been blocking him at every turn. He was going to confront the man and demand he explain why Benjamin’s death had be so quickly dismissed as an accident. Adrenaline surged through Bond’s body. Finally, he an opportunity for answers.

“Is he in here?” Bond opened a set of doors to his left. It was an ornate sitting room with a marble fireplace and Empire furniture.

“He’s in the library.” The butler sputtered. “Everett!”

A burly man, taller than Bond, appeared in the hallway. He was broad in the shoulders and had a visible earpiece. Instantly, Bond decided he was a bodyguard. The man rushed forward. Bond took two swift steps towards him building his forward momentum. He punched the man in the jaw with his forearm as Bond grabbed the guard’s left wrist. Bond twisted into the man and flipped him over his back. The man crashed onto the floor, knocking a silver tray off a credenza as he fell.

“What do you think you are doing?! Guards!” The roly-poly butler shouted. His face and fat neck turning red.

Bond spun back around and rushed down the hall. He came to another set of closed doors. He shoved them open. He immediately saw John Watson standing in the middle of the room. The short doctor had taken a defensive pose in front of the other man. Bond glanced over Watson’s shoulder and saw the other man.

Benjamin.

The Quartermaster.

He blinked and took in a quick breath. Instantly, he knew he wasn’t seeing things. He recognized Benjamin’s scent. The scent of baking cookies and tea. He looked again, taking a step forward. Then he noticed Benjamin’s body. The young man was pregnant. Several months pregnant.

He didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t sure what to do. Benjamin was not dead. He was very much alive and pregnant.

“Quartermaster.” Bond said feeling unsure.

“007.”

Bond heard the same voice he had heard in his ear for the last six years. The voice he thought he would never hear again. It made the situation even more difficult to understand. The air left the room. He couldn’t seem to breath.

The butler came running into the room with the guard Bond had overpowered. The guard grabbed Bond by the shoulders. He shook Bond, but the agent didn’t respond.

“Stop! Everett, please!” Benjamin shouted.

The guard looked over at Benjamin but didn’t release Bond. Bond remained still and didn’t put up any resistance to the guard. He kept staring at Benjamin’s swollen abdomen. _‘He’s pregnant! Benjamin is pregnant! And I’m not the father!’_

“It’s alright. I know this man. He is safe.” Benjamin said.

“Master Alcott, you must be mistaken.” Sydney nearly shouted. His normal composure shattered by the events in the hallway.

“It’s fine. I promise.” Benjamin said.

“I think I should call Mister Holmes.” Sydney said ignoring Benjamin’s statements.

“Everett please let go of Mister Bond.” Benjamin withheld the rest of the statement _‘before he kills you.’ _Benjamin felt certain he was Bond’s next victim instead of the hapless bodyguard.

Bond remained still just staring at the young omega and his enlarged belly. The bodyguard let go of Bond and stepped back. Sydney left the room huffing and stating he was calling Mycroft immediately. 

John, fearing for Benjamin, remained between Bond and the omega.

“James, I sure you have some questions?”

_‘Questions?’ _Of course, Bond had questions, but he didn’t know where to start. He couldn’t get his mind to slow down for ask the first question. _‘What would be the first question? Why are you alive? Why are you pregnant? Who is the father? Why did you lie_ _to me?’_ Bond glanced once more at Benjamin’s stomach, then turned and left. Benjamin took two steps towards the door but stopped when he heard the front door slamming shut.


	12. Please Listen to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benjamin tries to talk to James. But James is too angry to listen

July 2019

Mycroft returned immediately from Stockholm upon learning that his home had been breached by the agent. First thing he did was replace his security team. Then he called Mallory demanding to know the whereabouts of the agent. He wanted Bond arrested and isolated.

“Holmes, I have no verifiable information regarding the whereabouts of Bond. He is not in contact with us.” Mallory said calmly over the phone. The man’s composure just made Mycroft angrier.

“I want him isolated. He is not to speak to anyone. He is not to be questioned.” Mycroft growled.

“Why?”

“Because I said so!” Mycroft growled as he slammed the phone receiver down in its cradle

Mycroft was furious. He knew Mallory was lying to him, but he couldn’t come out and say it. He also noticed Mallory hadn’t mention Benjamin being alive. There was the possibility that Bond hadn’t rushed over to MI6 and disclosed his brother’s secret. But it was only a matter time until he did.

“Bastard.” Mycroft hissed.

“Mycroft, you’re giving me a headache.” Benjamin complained.

John Watson was seating next to the upset omega, slowly rubbing circles across his back. Sherlock had come over as soon as John had called him. The two had waited with Benjamin until Mycroft had returned home hours later.

“Benjamin, you need to eat something.” John said calmly. “I’m concern about you. You don’t look good.”

“I’m fucking pregnant. Of course, I look like shite!” Benjamin snapped at the other omega.

John didn’t take any offense at Benjamin’s outburst. He smiled softly and continued to rub the sick man’s back.

Mycroft scowled at the two of them. “Thank you, John, but your services won’t be needed any longer. I will be handling this from now on.”

Benjamin glared at his brother. “That is not your decision, Mycroft. I didn’t want to come back to London for this very reason, but you told me it was safe. If Bond tells Mallory I’m alive, then the assassins will know I’m alive and will come after us.”

Mycroft rolled his eyes. “I still do not have any evidence that the incidents are related.”

“Evidence!? How about the odds of probability? What are the odds the head of the CIA’s cyber-division, the head of the DGSE technical support, and the FSB’s equivalent to our Quartermaster being murdered within a month of each other? All three men were highly protected and safe, but it didn’t stop them from being murder!”

“All three men worked at very dangerous jobs. It wouldn’t be a coincidence if they were targeted for completely different reasons. A mugging, a suicide and a ‘home invasion’, Benjamin, there is no connection! It’s your imagination!” Mycroft expounded.

“A ‘home invasion’? Just like what happened here, today? Whoever is responsible for these deaths has access to top secret information. Being dead was the only safety I had, and you ruined it.” Benjamin accused.

“I disagree but if your spy is as dedicated as you have said, maybe you could convince him to remain quiet regarding your resurrection.”

Benjamin glared at his brother. Speaking to James was lasting thing he wanted to do.

~Q~

Benjamin felt sick. He hesitated on the front steps of James’ building, glancing up at the windows of James’ flat. Benjamin had another bout of ‘morning sickness’ just before coming over. He hadn’t been able to keep anything down since the horrible incident with James the day before. He felt very warm and wiped his hand across his brow. It came away dry. Q opened the door to building and walked up the single flight of stairs to James’ flat on the first floor.

He took a moment to steady himself before he knocked on the door. There was no answer. He had checked the CCTV feed outside the flat before coming over and knew Bond hadn’t left his flat in the last twelve hours. He knocked again more forcefully. There was a shuffling coming from inside the flat, but still no answer.

“Bond, open up.” Benjamin shouted in the edge of the door.

Suddenly, the door was yanked open. Bond stood there with a scowl on his face. He was wearing the same clothes from yesterday. Dark jeans and the black t-shirt. Benjamin’s eyes scanned over the snug shirt and saw the defined muscular body underneath. Benjamin bit his lip as he fought back in nature inclination to reach out for the alpha.

“May I come in?” He asked softly. His voice having a certain amount of hesitation in it.

Bond didn’t say anything. He turned around and walked away. Benjamin came into the flat, quietly closing the door behind him. As he followed Bond, Benjamin noticed the coffee table was missing as well as the television set. There was a noticeable hole in the wall opposite wall the couch. There were two empty scotch bottles on the counter in the small kitchen. The room smelled of alcohol and cigarettes.

“Redecorating?” Benjamin asked wanting to try to ease the tension.

“Say what you need to say and get the fuck out.” Bond snapped. Anger and hostility poured off the alpha.

Benjamin placed his palm protectively over his stomach. Bond noticed the movement. A wave of jealousy crashed into him.

“Is Watson the father?” he asked.

“John? No, of course not.” Benjamin said.

“So, there were others than him and me.”

“John’s an omega too.” Benjamin said.

Bond didn’t respond other than to sneer. “Do you know who the father is?”

Benjamin could hear ringing in his ears. He felt flush and wanted to sit down. “Yes. And it’s not important. I’m going to raise my child without anyone’s assistance.”

“Wasn’t going to offer. So, get out.”

“I need to know you won’t tell anyone.” Benjamin locked his knees and fought a wave of nausea down.

James ignored Q’s request. 

“Do you have any idea what you did to the people who cared about you? Do you even care?”

“Of course, I care! Do you think I did all this on a whim?!” Benjamin raised his voice. He fisted his hands at his side. He didn’t want this to turn into a shouting match.

“Then tell me why? Tell me why I came back from Russia to find out you were dead. Tell me why you put all of us through this!”

Benjamin’s head was hurting. The light in the room seemed to be too bright.

“I was afraid.” Benjamin said.

“AFRAID!” James shouted. “You were afraid of what I was going to do when I learned there were others?!”

James turned around and walked to the kitchen counter and poured himself another glass of alcohol.

“Please, don’t.” Benjamin whispered.

“Don’t what?!” James spun back and glared at the younger man. “Don’t be pissed off that you were sleeping with other alphas when I was gone? Don’t be ready to kill someone because I believed they had harmed you. Don’t feel gutted that the man I wanted to move in with decided to leave me without a word?!”

Benjamin’s eyes widened. “Move in with?”

James paused. He didn’t realize he had said the words out loud. He took a long drink of the scotch. It still burned slightly as it went down. He worried for a second he had said too much, but then he didn’t care. ‘_To hell with Benjamin’s feelings_.’ He thought.

“Yeah,” James slurred. “I was trying to figure out how I was going to ask you to move in here with me. I want us to be together whenever I was back in London.” James glared at Benjamin for a moment as the words sunk in. “More fool I for believing you felt the same way.”

“But I did!” the words rushed out of Benjamin’s mouth.

Bond scoffed at him. “Sure, you did. That’s why you faked your death and then hid from everyone at MI6.”

“James, please listen to me. I did want more. I did care about you, but I couldn’t stay.” Benjamin said.

“I see it didn’t take you long to get over me.” He waved his glass in a mocked salute towards Benjamin’s swollen belly. “Congratulations by the way. Does the father know?” 

Benjamin ducked his head and lowered his eyes. “No,” he whispered again.

“What a fuckin’ surprise. Aren’t you just full of secrets.”

Benjamin felt another wave of nausea hit him. He forced the bile back down as he squeezed his eyes shut.

“Would you just shut the fuck up and listen to me!” He shouted.

Briefly, James was surprised by Benjamin’s outburst, but his anger and bitterness washed back over him.

“Go ahead, Quartermaster.” He waved the glass at the younger man again.

Benjamin took a long nasally breath through his nose. And slowly lowed his shoulders.

“There are killers out there . . .”

“There are always killers out there.” James mocked.

“Someone is targeting the Quartermasters of the Intelligent Agencies around the world.” Benjamin said.

Bond opened his mouth to say something but stopped. His eyes were still burning with anger, but the insult died before he could say it.

“It started in Russia. The head of the TSS department of the FSB, Popov, was found dead. It was ruled a self-inflicted gunshot wound. Then two weeks later the head of the CIA’s Cyber-Division, Brian Mitchel was killed. It was listed as a home invasion.”

“Langley can be a rough town.”

Langley is a quiet area near the nation’s capital. Home invasion was plausible but not probable.

“His family was murdered too.” Benjamin continued. “Not just murdered. It appeared the man’s family had been tortured while he was forced to watch. Then all four . . . Mitchell, his omega, and his two children were shot in the head.”

Benjamin paled more as he spoke. He remembered looking at the pictures of the crime scene. He had been able to hack into the FBI servers when he was still at MI6. He shivered and fought his nausea.

“You haven’t said anything that would connect the two men.” Bond said. His voice more controlled. His anger being pushed back.

“Do you honestly believe two men as valuable as that would simply died within weeks of each other and it mean nothing?”

“And?” Bond asked.

“I knew I needed to go into hiding. Whoever was targeting us, knew too much about us. They had access to information – classified information. They could get to us. I thought the safest place I could be would be dead. My brother helped me. He falsified the DNA results on the body found.”

“Whose body was in the flat?” Bond asked. Bond stopped himself from asking ‘_whose body have I been crying over and morning for?’_

“He was unclaimed body from the city morgue.” Benjamin looked away from Bond. “He was the same size and weight as me. It was a drug overdose. Mycroft got his body and . . . well he was placed in the flat for the explosion. The autopsy results were altered to say he had died in the explosion. After the fake funeral, his cremated remains were returned to the depository for unclaimed bodies in London If his family ever comes looking for him, he will be there for them.” 

“Sounds like you had it perfectly worked out. Cold, precise and cowardly.” Bond said unsympathetically. His eyes were cold as ice. 

“Cowardly?! It was anything but that!”

“You ran away instead of letting anyone know there might be a threat. Sounds like a coward to me.”

“I couldn’t trust anyone at MI6. There was no where I could turn in the Secret Service.”

“We would have protected you.” Bond growled. His expression was vicious and cruel.

“Like they protected Mitchel and his family? Like Popov was protected?”

“A home invasion, and a suicide? I don’t see a connection.”

“Maybe you should ask your friend Lieter about a connection. Ask him what Mitchell’s family looked like when they found them. How his children looked? Popov, Mitchell and Daquin were all killed two weeks apart.” Benjamin paused and turned away.

“But that doesn’t explain why you lied to me!”

“Because . . .” the words were trapped in Benjamin’s throat. Bond just stared at him. “Because I knew it would be better for everyone . . . including you.”

At that moment, Bond hated Benjamin. Hated him more than he hated anyone. Benjamin looked so weak and fray, but he had hurt Bond more than anyone else ever had.

“You’re an idiot.” Bond growled.

“What?”

“You heard me. You’re an idiot. Don’t try and alibi yourself by saying you were doing it for me. You could have gone to Tanner or Mallory, or even Danielle. Any of them would have helped you. You didn’t need to be such a miserable little coward and run away.”

“I was pregnant!”

“So, what.” Bond growled.

“My child! I had to protect my child.” The word ‘our’ hung in Benjamin’s throat.

His head was pounding now. The ringing in his ears had gotten worse. He was having difficulty focusing. Bond was yelling at him and he just wanted the man to stop it. He wanted James to understand, to care, but he couldn’t seem to make his words work.

How could James be so stupid? Benjamin did what he did to keep their child safe. Not to save his own life but that of their child. What was wrong with James!

“You disgust me.” James snarled.

Benjamin didn’t hear the words. The ringing drowned out every other sound. He couldn’t see any more. His vision had greyed out. He was suddenly flushed with a wave of heat as his legs gave out. The last thing he remembered was to wrap his hands protectively around his stomach as he collapsed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't be too angry with James. He is hurting and feeling very betrayed. As for Benjamin, he is obviously not thinking clearly.


	13. Medical

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank you all for the wonderful comments and the kudos. It really makes writing so much more enjoyable when I know someone likes my stories. More angst and anger in this chapter but things are beginning to break open for our boys.

_September 2018_

_“If you ever do anything like this again, I’ll kill you myself!” Benjamin growled. He was sitting on James hips, pinning the injured man to the bed. “Do you know how frightened I was? Do you even care that I was terrified?” _

_James couldn’t help but smile. After leaping out of speeding car before it crashed over an embankment and into a ravine, Bond returned to London and to his Quartermaster with three cracked ribs and a dislocated shoulder. He was in pain and looking at several weeks of rehab, but he was smiling. _

_“It wasn’t my fault the brakes went out.” James teased back. _

_“I was on the coms with you. I told you to take the truck. I knew the truck was safe.” _

_“But it was a 1961 Ferrari Spyder.” _

_“It was a damn convertible! You could have had your head taken off when they started shooting at you!” _

_Something warm was blooming in his chest. James laughed. “But . . .” _

_Benjamin leaned forward, placing his hands on either side of James’ head to brace himself. He quickly pressed his lips to James’ and stopped him from saying anything else. Careful and tender kisses from warm lips. Benjamin paused and looked deeply into James’ blue eyes. _

_“Don’t scare me again. Promise.” _

_“If you promise to always welcome me back with kisses in your bed.” _

_“Promise.” _

_That’s all James wanted to hear._

~Q~

July 2019 

Bond struggled to control his anger. He thought the young omega must be insane to come here and confront him. He had killed people for less than what Benjamin had put him through.

He had spent every free moment those last two months they were together thinking of how he could convince Benjamin to move in with him. He wanted more; he wanted a real relationship with the man. He was even beginning to consider bonding with Benjamin. Then he was betrayed.

Not only had Benjamin faked his death, but he was pregnant. Bond knew it couldn’t be his. He had shared Benjamin’s heat twice, but each time, Benjamin was not pregnant afterwards. Benjamin was also on birth control. Had been for several months. No, Bond knew he couldn’t be the father.

That meant that Benjamin had gotten pregnant by some other alpha while he was away. The small omega allowed someone other than Bond to touch him. Sleep with him. Fuck him. Every time Bond thought about it, he saw red.

Bond’s anger was drowning out everything else in the room. He could only see Benjamin’s face, His rage at the younger man was washing everything else away. He could hear Benjamin talking but it sounded like he was under water. And what he was saying didn’t make sense. Nothing made sense. Benjamin didn’t trust MI6. He was afraid MI6 would betray him. Benjamin was frightened but couldn’t come to him. Wouldn’t come to him. He tried to explain there was threat. It was ridiculous. Who was crazy enough to go after all those different executives within different secret services?

Bond refused to listen to him. His anger grew brighter and sharper. He wanted to yell; wanted to lash out and hurt Benjamin like he had hurt James. He wanted to grab Benjamin and shake him. Take him and make him understand how much pain he had cause. How much guilt and regret Bond had felt when he was told the omega had died. The anger and hatred he suffered seeing the omega heavy with another alpha’s child.

Bond was so angry he didn’t notice the change in Benjamin’s color. As they argued, Benjamin became ashen. Bond watched as Benjamin’s hazel eyes rolled back up into his head and his body slackened. As if the strings of a puppet had been cut, Benjamin started to collapse towards the floor. Instinctively, Bond rushed forward. Only his rapid reflexes kept the young man from falling completely. Bond cradled the Benjamin. His right arm wrapped under Benjamin’s shoulders as his left hand laid protectively over the omega’s abdomen and his child.

“Benjamin!” Bond barked.

The young man remained unresponsive in Bond’s arms. He didn’t open his eyes or move. His skin so pale it looked like white marble. The lids over Benjamin’s eyes were almost translucent. The fingers of Bond’s hand slipped up and felt for a pulse in the young man’s throat. The rhythm was strong but rapid. The omega’s breathing was rapid and shallow.

Bond moved quickly. He swooped down and picked the man up, resting Benjamin’s head against his right shoulder. Benjamin didn’t move. He didn’t make a sound. For a brief moment, Bond didn’t trust his first impressions. He leaned closer and waited until he felt the soft brush of Benjamin’s breath against his cheek. The tightness in his chest lessen and his instincts took control. He pulled Benjamin’s body closer. Briefly hugging the man in his arms.

After a frightful and anxious drive through London, Bond pulled his car up to the special entrance at MI6. The entrance was restricted and only the ambulances that brought operatives to Medical were allowed to use it. It led to a reserved lift. Bond parked right by the door. The young man hadn’t regained consciousness during the drive over. His skin was still ashen and had become clammy.

With Benjamin in his arms, Bond took the lift to Medical. He was greeted by a security guard as he exited the lift. He pushed passed the man and carried Benjamin straight into the department. Ignoring the gasps and excited comments as he passed.

“I need Farris!” Bond shouted as he carefully laid the omega down on a bed.

“Now wait just one minute . . .” A nurse who had followed him into the room, started to argue.

“Get me Farris now or else.” Bond growled at the woman.

The small beta nurse rushed from the room terrified. The privacy curtain was violently yanked open, and Dr. Colleen Farris came in.

“Bond!? What the hell are you doing?!” She growled at the man. Bond backed away from the bed and Farris glanced down at the prone man. She gasped and took a hesitant step forward. “Q!?”

Bond stepped towards the head of the bed, placing his hand on Q’s shoulder. Doctor Farris stepped closer and looked at Q.

“But he’s dead . . . I thought . . . where . . . did you know he was alive?” She rambled.

“No, he passed out about twenty minutes ago.”

Farris glanced up at Bond then back down at the omega. Her eyes moving down Q’s body from his face to his stomach. She glanced back up at Bond again with an unasked question in her eyes. Bond refused to answer her.

“Get me ‘chem seven’ panel. I want a CBC and blood gases.” She removed the stethoscope from around her neck. Slipping the earplugs in, she listened to Q’s chest. “Start an IV with normal saline and half a liter of oxygen.” She raised his eyelids and studied the reaction of his pupils.

The staff rushed forward. A nurse already had a syringe in his hand, coming at Benjamin. Bond instantly growled and stepped forward; threatening and blocking the nurse from the omega. The nurse stepped back. Dr. Farris glanced up at Bond again and spoke in a low voice.

“James, you need to let us help him.”

Bond’s eyes flicked towards the doctor. He was surprised by his own reaction. He didn’t know he felt so protective of Q.

“We won’t hurt him or the child. Don’t worry.”

Bond glanced down at the still omega. He replaced his hand on Q’s shoulder. The young man didn’t move. Bond looked at Q’s pale face then back up at the doctor. He nodded his head.

“I’m sorry. Yes, please, help him.”

Farris gave a small nod and the nurses slowly approached the bed. Within minutes an IV was in Q’s arm and blood was being rushed to the laboratory.

“Is he taking any medication?” Farris asked Bond.

“I don’t know.” Bond answered her.

She glanced at the alpha again.

“What about vitamins? Who is his OBGYN?”

Bond shook his head. “I don’t know.”

“Do you know how far along he is?” She asked.

Bond’s frustration at not knowing the answers was evident. Dr. Farris didn’t ask any more questions.

A few moments later, Dr. Farris was looking over the results of Q’s laboratory tests. She frowned.

“Cath him,” she said to the nurse. “I want a UA. And start him on a lipid IV.”

“What’s wrong?” Bond asked.

Dr. Farris was still frowning when she turned to Bond.

“I need to know what he had been doing. Where has he been?”

Bond’s hand tightened on Q’s shoulder. “I only learned he was still alive yesterday. Before that . . . I don’t know.” The anxiety was obvious in his voice.

“And the child? Who is the father? Who has been responsible for the Quartermaster while he’s been gone?”

Bond shook his head.

“Just tell me what is wrong.”

“His blood chemistry looks like he has been starving himself. His electrolytes are out. I need to see if he has ketones in his urine.”

“The pregnancy? Is the baby alright?”

“It’s not good, but hopefully we’ve caught it in time. Sometimes this happens in pregnancies. Usually this level of ketones is gestational diabetes, but not always. Occasionally, omegas have morning sickness so bad they can’t take enough nutrients in. Their bodies go into a starvation state and start breaking down body fat and muscle. That increases the ketones in the system. Too much ketone is bad for the baby. But obstetrics is not my specialty.”

“Is that why he is unconscious? When will he wake up?” Bond asked looking down at the still man in the bed.

“As soon as we rehydrate him, we need to balance his electrolytes and get some nutrients into him.”

“I’m staying with him.”

Dr. Farris didn’t argue with the alpha. She turned and walked out to make a phone call to Bill Tanner.

~Q~

Slowly Benjamin became aware. His eyes fluttered, then opened. At first, he was very disoriented. The bed was very narrow. He hadn’t slept in a twin bed since he was in school. Second, the room smelled funny. It smelled of disinfectant and was bitter. He noticed his arm hurt. There was a sharp burning pain near his wrist. Also, his head hurt. It felt like the beginning of a migraine headache. A throb behind his eyes with each heartbeat.

He groaned softly as he slowly blinked his eyes. The light was too bright and made it difficult to focus. He heard voices speaking softly. He tried to listen but couldn’t make out what they were saying. Suddenly, someone shouted.

“I told you I don’t know! He just showed up at my flat, then passed out!”

Benjamin knew that voice. It was James’. He groaned and tried to turn into the sound. He wanted James. He knew James would make him feel better.

“Ahh.”

Bond and Farris looked at Q. Bond’s hand reached up to carefully card through Q’s thick curls.

“Benjamin, open your eyes.”

“Too much effort.” Q mumbled.

He leaned into the warm touch of James’ hand. He purred softly as he nuzzled James’ palm.

It felt good. It smelled good. James. Q smiled softly and sighed. If only the pain behind his eyes would lessen. He winced again as the pain seared through his pleasant moment.

“My head hurts.” Q moaned.

“Did he hit his head when he fainted?” Farris asked as she approached the bed.

“No.” Bond said quickly.

Benjamin recognized the woman’s voice. It was Dr. Colleen Farris from MI6. The room became familiar too. He was in Medical. He was at MI6. Benjamin’s eyes opened widely and stared up at the man standing over him.

Bond saw the instant fear in Q’s eyes. It tugged at him. He saw the young man pull himself inward and away from him. Bond removed his hand from Q’s face. His fingertips lightly brushing against Q’s chin as they slipped passed.

“You brought me to Medical.” Q whispered.

“You fainted.” Bond said as he stood up straight. His hands falling to his sides as he felt the wall return between the two of them.

“Q, I need to ask you some question.” Farris interrupted the two men. Q twisted and blinked at her but kept glancing back towards Bond. 

“My glasses?”

Bond pulled them out of his pocket and handed them to Q. The young man slipped them on and looked owlishly out from behind them.

“Who is your obstetrician?” Farris started.

Benjamin looked sheepishly at the other two. “I don’t officially have one. I’ve been meaning to get one.” Benjamin said weakly. “Is the baby alright?”

“We’ll do an ultrasound to check, but I believe everything is fine with him. But not with you. Have you been eating well?”

Benjamin looked down at his swollen abdomen. “No, I throw everything up after I eat. I haven’t been able to keep much down at all.”

“Are you taking anything for the nausea?” Farris asked.

“I was afraid it would be bad for the baby.”

“What about vitamins? Any?”

“No, like I said, I haven’t seen an obstetrician yet.”

Farris frowned and tutted. “Well, you’ve gotten yourself into a quite a mess. You’re starving your body.”

“Did I hurt the baby?”

“No, he’ll take what he needs, but you don’t have any more reserves left for yourself. We’ve started you on some IV feedings and I’m going to get you some promethazine. It will help with the nausea and won’t harm the little one. Did the father of the baby know about the morning sickness?”

“No,” Benjamin looked away from the two people. “I know I needed an OBGYN months ago, but I was in . . . I couldn’t find one.”

Farris turned away from the bed and addressed someone standing outside of Q’s vision.

“You can talk to him now, but don’t tire him. I will do the ultrasound when you are done.”

Q tried to sit up and see who she was speaking to, but Bond pushed the young man back down into the bed. Q heard the footsteps then Gareth Mallory step around the curtain and into sight.

“Quartermaster.” Mallory’s tone was stern and arresting. The man’s face was cold and unsympathetic. His watery blue eyes were unforgiving.

Q nodded his head at the man. He didn’t want to speak. His mouth felt very dry.

“You can imagine how surprised I was to learn that you were brought into Medical today. Especially after the fact we had your memorial service several months ago.” Mallory glared.

“It was necessary for me to disappear.” Q said barely above a whisper.

“Because of that?” Mallory looked pointedly at Q’s abdomen.

“Yes, and no.” Q answered him.

“I believe after everything we had been through it would have been obvious that you could have come to us and explained what happened. We would have been there for you. You didn’t need to make us believe you were dead. It was cruel.”

“I had my reasons. I believed my safety was compromised within MI6.”

“Bullshit!” Mallory roared. “You abandoned us. All of us who cared about you. If your safety was really compromise, we would have done anything to protect you.”

Bond stepped closer, possessively standing next to Q. Mallory ignored the alpha.

“Did your brother facilitate this hoax? Did he help you hide?” Mallory pressed.

“There was a reason to believe that someone was targeting me.” Q plead.

“Because Bond got you knocked-up? You were afraid of what we would do to you?”

“No.”

Bond felt a growl start in his throat. He swallowed it back down before it escaped.

“It was for my safety and my child’s that I faked my death. Mycroft helped me. It was the only option that was open to me.” Q looked away from Mallory.

“Idiotic.” Mallory spat the word out as he turned and left. He marched out of the room.

Another wave of nausea washed over Q. He closed his eyes and leaned heavily into the pillows. He felt a warm hand wrap around his own. Slowly, Q opened his eyes and look up at James.

“He was right,” James said quietly. “You were an idiot for not coming to us with the information.”

Q felt a swell of regret fill his throat. His eyes burned with tears.

“I couldn’t.”

“You could have come to me, regardless of who the father was.”

A weak cry escaped Benjamin’s mouth before he could stop it. The first tear slipped down his face as he squeezed tighter to James’ hand.

The two men simply stared at each other in silence. Both wanted the other to understand, but neither could find the words to explain.

Their trance was broken by Dr. Farris coming in. She was pushing an ultrasound machine in front of her.

“Alright, let’s take a look at the Junior Quartermaster.” Her voice was far too cheery to be genuine.

James let go of Benjamin’s hand and stepped back towards the head of the bed and out of the doctor’s way. She rolled the machine beside the bed and lifted Benjamin’s shirt. It only took a few minutes for the doctor to set the machine up and put the cool gel on Q’s abdomen. All three people stared at the flickering images on the screen as Farris dragged the wand over Q’s belly.

“Looks okay. Two arms, two legs, one head.” She teased. She pressed a button and the room was filled with the whooshing sound of a fetal heartbeat.

Q quickly reached up and took James’ hand again. He squeezed it tight.

“That’s the first time I’ve heard her.” Q whispered.

“Her? You think it’s a girl?” James asked.

“I’m hoping.”

James and Q turned towards Dr. Farris. She shrugged her shoulders. “I can’t tell from this angle the sex of the child. Quartermaster, how far along are you?”

Benjamin swallowed then said, “Six months. I conceived the last week of December.”

James looked down at Benjamin. “We were still together.”

“Yes.” Benjamin breathed. He kept his eyes focused on James’.

“You were seeing someone else?” An iciness returned to James’ voice.

Benjamin shook his head.

The reality exploded in James’ chest. He listened to the steady rapid heartbeat of the child. His child. Their child. He tightened the grip he had on Q’s hand.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispered. He didn’t trust his voice to speak louder.

“Because you didn’t want one.” Q mouthed silently. He couldn’t bring himself to give sound to the words.

The statement burned through Bond’s body as fast as the realization he was a father. He looked back at the flickering black and white pictures. The perfectly round head with small curve of a nose. The small hands and delicate fingers. His child. Theirs. 

Someone pointedly cleared his throat and broke the spell between Q and James. Both men turned to see Mycroft Holmes standing in the room.

“Who are you?” Doctor Farris said as she quickly covered Q’s exposed abdomen.

“Benjamin will be accompanying me, Doctor Farris. If you will please conclude your examination.” Mycroft said blandly.

“What?!” Farris asked astonished.

“I have made arrangements for Benjamin to be taken to a private clinic where he will receive the very best care. Your services are no longer needed, Doctor Farris. Thank you.” Mycroft’s attention shifted towards James. “And Mister Bond, if you will please join me in the hallway, I wish to speak to you privately.”

“Mycroft, please?” Q begged his brother.

“Don’t worry, Benjamin. All has been arranged.” Mycroft turned and left the examination room.

James took a step to follow but Q pulled him back. James could see the pleading in Q’s eyes but didn’t understand what it meant.

He followed Mycroft out into the hallway.

“Who the hell are you?” Bond asked.

“No one you need to concern yourself with.” Mycroft said superiorly. “You will not contact Benjamin Holmes again.”

“Why not?”

“It should be obvious, even to a blunt object like yourself should understand that my brother wishes to have nothing to do with you.” Mycroft said as his looked down his nose at Bond.

“You might want to rethink that. Benjamin is carrying my child.” Even as he said the words out loud, they seemed unbelievable.

“You may have impregnated my brother, but that doesn’t mean that you will have anything to do with him or his offspring. It is quite clear by Benjamin’s actions, that he regards you as unsuitable as a father figure or role model for his child.”

Bond’s anger was building again.

“I have as much right to my child as Benjamin does.”

“No, you will not. I will make certain of that. Now, do not ever contact Benjamin again, and do not bother my other brother and his mate.”

“Or what? Are you threating me?” Bond wanted nothing more than to punch the poncy politician in the face.

“Oh no, Mister Bond, I am not threating you. I am promising you. If you ever bother any member of my family again you will never see England again.”

Mycroft smiled condescendingly, then stepped around Bond. He returned to the examination room, pulling the privacy curtain behind him. A minute later the curtain was opened, and Q was being pushed in a wheelchair. Q stared at James as the wheelchair was rolled passed Bond. Q was pushed into the lift and doors closed. Neither man said a word to each other.

The next day, Bond was sent on a mission to South America.


	14. The Need to Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James struggles to understand what happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the rating on this story is Teen because it is more angst than any thing else, but . . . there is a brief bit of smut in this chapter. Not enough that I feel I need to change the rating but if not your thing please skip the flashback scene. It is not graphic or explicit.

July 2019

Mallory would deny that he acquiesced to Mycroft Holmes’ demands, but when it was mentioned that every request for increases to MI6’s budget would be refused unless a certain operative was reassigned, Mallory found a mission for Bond that would take him out of the country. Meanwhile, he and Tanner were working in the background to prevent that from happening again.

To say that Bond’s mind was not focused on the mission was an understatement. The mission in South America was a disaster. The first week he had identified his target and was ready to eliminate him, but he missed. He had shot the bodyguard instead of the leader of the cartel. After the botched assassination, the drug lord went into hiding. Three days later, Bond missed a second opportunity to kill the man. Then the day after that, his identity was discovered by another member of the cartel. Bond spent the next few days on the run from killers with a bounty on his head.

He knew why he was screwing up so badly. It was obvious to everyone. The Quartermaster and the pregnancy. Benjamin said Bond was the father but didn’t explain any further. Bond couldn’t believe it. Q had been taking contraceptives. There couldn’t be a way he was the father – unless. He dialed the direct line to Medical and asked to speak to Colleen Farris.

“You took four days longer to call me than I expected,” she said as a greeting.

“I need to ask you a question.” He said trying to sound indifferent. He was glad he was in a secure place and didn’t need to worry about being attacked. He couldn’t have this conversation interrupted.

“I’m sure there are several questions you would like answers to.”

“I can’t be the father.” He paused then glanced down at the list of questions he had made. “How old did the Quartermaster’s baby look?”

“Remember that obstetrics in not my specialty, but the ultrasound was consistent with a twenty-six-week fetus.”

“He was on contraceptives. We were responsible.” 

“I thought you were going to ask about this. I went ahead and reviewed the Quartermaster’s medical record. Now patient confidentiality prevents me from speaking about specifics, but the contraceptives he had been prescribed have a 98% effectiveness rate.”

Bond felt a burning in his chest. Benjamin must have lied to him – again.

“But they require patient compliance,” she continued.

“What do you mean?” Bond asked.

“Was he good about taking them?”

“Yes, every morning with his first cup of tea.” Bond remember the bottle sat next to the kettle in the kitchen.

“What about the times he didn’t go home and was here all night? Did he take them here?”

“Yes, he had a bottle in desk drawer.” Bond thought about the small bottle he had seen in Q’s office. Then he remembered something. “The week of Christmas, 006 was on a mission. He was in trouble and Q stayed on the coms with him for thirty-six hours straight.”

“Did he stop and take any medication?”

“No, we brought him his tea to his station.” Bond remember how focused Q was in trying to rescue Alec. He watched as minions brought him cup after cup of tea to him. Finally, James made sure he had a sandwich. The man had been up for almost forty hours with Alec. Afterwards, James bought Q back to his flat where the young man slept for a whole day.

“He might have gone two days without taking any contraceptives.”

He could hear Farris sigh on the other end of the line. “Omega contraceptives are synthetic hormones. If they get below a certain level, they can trigger either a micro-heat three to four days later, or a full-blown heat within a month. During either heat, the omega is fertile. Did Q have a micro-heat around New Years?” Farris asked.

Bond thought back to the last time he had been with Q. Just before New Year’s.

_Q had woken up ravenous after sleeping for nearly eighteen hours. But it wasn’t food he hungered for. He pushed the alpha down on into the oversized armchair. _

_“Get it out, Bond. I want it.” The crazed little omega said. _

_James smiled. He loved it when Benjamin became bossy like this. There was something so completely enduring and sexy about the smaller man trying to bully the bigger, stronger man. _

_James unbuttoned his jeans and lifted his hips while he pushed them and his pants down his thighs. He watched Benjamin as he did it. Benjamin quickly shed the old t-shirt he stole from James’ wardrobe. Then shimmied out of his own pants. _

_Benjamin’s body was gorgeous to James. Long slender limbs covered with unblemished skin. The palest pinks tinted his normally ivory skin. Benjamin didn’t hesitate. He stepped up onto the chair; placing a foot on either side of James’ hips. In this position, Benjamin’s groin was at eyelevel with James. The alpha couldn’t help but notice the complete engorged member bobbing in front of him. _

_James also noticed the scent. Benjamin’s normal scent of baking cookies and Earl Grey tea were present but there was also a heady aroma of musk. It made his mouth water and blood rushed south to fill his own length. _

_James grabbed Benjamin’s hips and pulled the man forward. He placed a sweet light kiss to the head of Benjamin’s penis._

_“No time for that now.” Benjamin grabbed James’ wrists and pulled them away. _

_He squatted down, bending his knees down so he could kneel over James’ lap. Benjamin let go of James’ wrist but then quickly grabbed James’ half-filled cock. He stroked it several times, then leaned up. _

_“Are you already ready?” James asked. _

_Benjamin’s scent was becoming intoxicating. James didn’t want to wait but he thought he should at least give the appearance of consideration. _

_“I don’t care, I want you.” Benjamin’s voice was rough as he grabbed either side of James’ face and proceeded to devour it with his kisses. _

_Benjamin leaned back and James’ aroused cock slipped easily into Benjamin’s body. Briefly in the back of James’ mind it registered that Benjamin was producing more slick than normal. That his body seemed warmer. But the sensation of the Benjamin’s tongue licking into his mouth and tightness of the omega’s body around him, pushed all other thoughts away. _

_James’ hands circled over Benjamin’s shoulders and around his back. He pulled the omega closer then shoved up into his body. The guttural moan from the younger man was more than gratifying. _

The memories of their last time together came flooding back to him. Bond had known that in three days, he was being sent to Russia for an extended mission. He didn’t want to leave the omega. They had sex in every room of Bond’s flat. It hadn’t been like a heat. There wasn’t the overpowering need, but James remember how intensely he felt for Benjamin. How much he wanted to bond with the man and regretted he didn’t.

Bond felt sick. He wondered how he could have been so stupid to not realize what was happening. The one time he didn’t use condoms was the one time he desperately needed to. ‘_But did he really?_’ he thought. _Would it be horrible to be a father?_ Regulations required he give up his Double ‘O’ status, but he was only a few years away from mandatory retirement anyway. He was already thinking about retiring early so he could commit to Benjamin more. _Was the fact he was going to be father that bad of an idea? Could he be a father? A good father?_

“He might have had a micro-heat.” Bond whispered.

“Then I believe there is a reasonable probability you are the father. Is that a problem?” 

“I’m not sure. I need to speak to him.”

~Q~

September 2019

Bond returned from Columbia eight weeks later. He knocked on the front door of the house where he had seen Benjamin, but no one answered the door. For a brief moment he considered breaking in but decided against it.

Danielle told him that she had followed the ambulance that took Benjamin away from MI6 using CCTV. It led Bond to a private clinic in Camden. But Benjamin had been discharged few days after he had arrived.

After a week of no luck, Bond went back to Baker Street. He stood on the stoop of 221 staring at the black door. He wasn’t sure how he was going to convince Watson to help him, but he was out of options.

He knocked on the door and was surprised when it was answered by an elderly woman with pale blue eyes. She was petite and pleasant. Smiling brightly at him as she ushered him into the foyer.

“The boys are upstairs, but they don’t usually accept clients on Tuesday.” She tutted around him. “Go on up. Sherlock needs a good murder.”

Momentarily Bond was thrown by the comment. He wondered if Sherlock was hoping for a murder or was going to commit a murder. Unconsciously, he palmed his holster under his jacket as he climbed the stairs.

The door to the flat was standing open. Bond poked his head in and looked around. The room was decorated with two different wallpapers. There was a hodgepodge of furniture. Different styles and colors. The double desk between the two windows was covered with books and periodicals. There was a knife pinning letters to the wooden mantel next to a realistic skull. Upon further evaluation, Bond decide it was real.

“Come in, Bond.” The voice was imperious and disembodied.

Bond stepped further into the room and saw Sherlock and John standing in the small kitchen off the sitting room. The counters of the kitchen were crowded with what appeared to be a sophisticated chemistry equipment. Bond sniffed the air to see if he detected any hint of illegal drug manufacturing. He didn’t.

“I need your assistance.” Bond said.

Sherlock looked smugly at the agent then walked towards one of the chairs by the cold fireplace.

“Unless you have a complicated murder or robbery that needs solving, I don’t believe I will be able to help you.” 

Bond reassured himself he could deal with this Holmes. He had dealt with mega-maniacs before. Bond schooled himself to remain calm towards the arrogant man.

“I want to speak to Benjamin. I need to ask him why he kept the pregnancy from me.”

Sherlock eyes scanned over the man for several seconds, while John stood quietly in the kitchen door surprised by Bond’s comment.

“One could surmise he didn’t want you to know because he didn’t trust you.”

“He said that killers were after him.” Bond said.

Sherlock sat up in his chair. “He had mentioned that to both Mycroft and myself. I find it improbable, but I don’t ever underestimate my brother. If there had been an attempt on his life, wouldn’t MI6 provide him with protection?”

“We would have protected him. I would have protected him.” Bond moved closer to Sherlock but kept Watson in his view. He wouldn’t underestimate the doctor again.

“You would have protected him or your nascent progeny?” Sherlock sneered.

“Benjamin. I would do everything to keep him safe up to and including murder.” Bond said sincerely.

Sherlock slowly nodded his head and then took another scrutinizing look at the agent. John stepped forward and moved to stand closer to Sherlock.

“Sherlock, don’t do anything stupid.” John warned softly.

“John, he is a serial adulterer. Why should we believe him?”

Bond twitched slightly at the comment. He wondered if Holmes was expecting him to be contrite. If Holmes was expecting him to deny or beg forgiveness. Bond had done many bad things, but he refused to apologize for them.

“Don’t confuse requirements of my job with my personal behavior.” Bond said.

“I’m not.” Sherlock said smugly. “You have short term relationships. Nothing lasting over a few months. You have been an agent for many years. You are very good at it. You were in the navy before you joined the ‘Service’. You enjoy indulging yourself. Fine clothing, rich food, and fast cars. Probably because you were an orphan. And you are not English. You are Scottish. You’ve done an excellent job at covering up your nationality, but when you are angry, there is a slight alteration in your vowels.”

“Sherlock don’t do that. He could be armed.” John sighed and rolled his eyes.

“Of course, he is armed. A shoulder holster under his left arm. Small, probably an automatic. A Beretta or maybe a Walther.”

Bond unconsciously reached for the gun but stopped halfway. His palm spread across his chest. He wasn’t sure how Sherlock Holmes knew so much about him; but if the man was half as intelligent as his younger brother, Bond could only imagine.

John sighed again and frowned. “Look, we thought you were the reason that Benjamin decided to go into hiding. We thought you did something to him that made him want to leave. We didn’t know he never told you. Or that there was a threat to his life.”

“He didn’t tell anyone at MI6 about the threat. I don’t even know if it is real because I can’t talk to him.” Bond said being pulled out of his astonishment.

“I tried to talk to him when he was at the clinic. I tried to convince him to call you, but Mycroft and his mother kept him secluded.” John said.

“Is he still speaking to you?” Bond asked.

“He occasionally calls. We could ask to see him before he gives birth.”

Sherlock frowned. “John, it may be my brother’s wish to not have any contact with Bond.”

“Do you really think he would be here if he didn’t want anything to do with Benjamin and baby?” John asked Sherlock. The dark-haired man shook his head. “What if the situation was the other way around. What if I was the pregnant omega and you were being kept away from me?”

The expression on Sherlock’s face darkened. He reached out and took John’s hand.

“I would do whatever it took to get to you. I would go through anyone who stood in my way.”

The two stared at each other for several seconds, holding hands. Then Sherlock rose.

“If we discover where Mycroft and my mother have placed Benjamin then we will tell you.”

Bond nodded and thanked Sherlock. He left the flat hoping that he would see Benjamin soon. He made it down the stairs when John called out to him.

“Bond.”

James turned and looked up at the doctor slowly coming down the stairs behind him. He waited, letting John speak first.

“They are difficult.”

“Who? Mycroft and his mother?”

“No, all the Holmes’s. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to punch one of them in the face,” John tried to joke, but Bond didn’t smile. “Look, believe it or not, I know what it is like to be told a Holmes is dead then have them come back and act like nothing happened.”

James remained quiet as he listened. It seemed remarkable that both he and Watson had been duped the same way.

“Sherlock faked his death a few years back. It nearly killed me. I can’t tell you how horrible it was.”

“I think I can imagine.” James said very expressionless, but there was a bitter undertone to his voice.

John was kind enough to appear apologetic. “Yeah, I guess you can. Look, right now, while you are raw it is hard to understand why Benjamin did this. You just want to lash out. Anyone would, but when you find him, try and listen to him.”

“I would listen if he would just talk to me.”

“Have you ever met their parents?” John asked.

“No.”

“Well, when you do, it will explain a lot about the three boys. Each in their own way is an overachiever. Still trying to get their mother’s approval. And none of them understanding the basics of emotional content. Social norms and empathy.”

“You make them sound like a bunch of sociopaths.”

John huffed out a small laugh. “Maybe I am, but believe me when I say, I know you are hurting. You don’t want to show it and you probably don’t want to even acknowledge it to yourself. It will be the most natural thing in the world to attack him when you see him again, but don’t. Give him a chance to explain – even if you have to wait for him to figure out how to say the words.”

Bond stared at Watson for a moment. “Will it be worth it? Is Sherlock worth what he put you through?”

John glanced over his shoulder and up the stairs. “Yeah,” he turned back and smiled. “Yeah, I think he is. Every bit.”

James held out his hand and John took it. The two men shook hands then Bond left feeling like he finally had an ally in the Holmes’ camp.

~Q~

The phone call came a week later. It was John.

“Mycroft just called us.”

“Where is he?” Bond asked.

“Mycroft wouldn’t tell us. Sherlock is trying to figure it out, but he could be anywhere. Benjamin gave birth to a baby girl. Seven and half pounds. They are both doing fine.”

Bond hung the phone up and proceeded to get drunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for the wonderful comments and kudos. Next chapter next week.


	15. What's in a Name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benjamin's daughter is born.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An emotional chapter with a different Holmes family interaction. Or Montgomery finally gets fed up.

September 2019

It was exhausting but worth it. Benjamin felt he had run a marathon and every muscle in his body was worn out. The memory of extreme pain remained floating in the background like a phantom, but Benjamin refused to acknowledge it. He had something far more important to focus on.

Benjamin laid in the bed looking down at the tiny baby he careful held in his arms. Her small round face was as pink as the blanket she was swaddled in. Benjamin cooed softly at his child, smiling brightly. Montgomery Holmes sat on the edge of the bed watching his son and granddaughter.

“Daddy, she is beautiful.”

“Yes, she is.” Montgomery said with certainty. “You and brothers weren’t the most attractive babies, more like pink blobby things, but she is adorable.”

Benjamin tried to look hurt by his father’s comment, but the light in eyes was too bright and the pout quickly melted away and became an open enduring smile.

“Have you seen her eyes?”

“The brightest blue I’ve ever seen on a baby.” Montgomery said.

Benjamin looked back down at his child. “They’re just like James’. The most beautiful eyes I think I’ve ever seen. Like diamonds.”

Montgomery laughed softly. Benjamin fussed with the blanket, pulling the edge down away from his daughter’s chin.

“She’s got a Holmes’ chin.” Benjamin said.

“Let’s hope she doesn’t have a Holmes’ obstinance.” Montgomery offered.

“Or James’ ears.” Benjamin giggled a little.

“Is she going to have a name?” Montgomery asked.

“I like Aislinn.” Benjamin said.

Montgomery nodded in agreement. “Irish. Your mother and brother will be – disappointed.”

“Good.”

“Your mother was very much expecting you to name her first granddaughter after her mother, Gundred.” Montgomery said. A hint of jesting in his voice.

Benjamin rolled his eyes. “Could you imagine the bullying she would have to endure with that name.”

Montgomery gave a crooked smile. He was looking forward to telling his wife she would not be getting her way this time.

“What about James?” Montgomery asked.

“As a name for a girl?” Benjamin asked, as he looked up at his father. The sincere concern in his father expression made Benjamin feel weak. “Oh, I don’t know what names he would like.”

“Are you going to ask him?”

“it’s not that simple, Dad.”

“It could be.” Montgomery offered.

“No, honestly, it couldn’t.”

Montgomery sighed and leaned back slightly. He studied his son’s face as Benjamin stared down into his daughter’s face. He could tell that Benjamin was just on the edge of crying.

“What are you going to tell her when she finally asks about him?”

Benjamin hesitated. “I don’t know.”

“You know the alpha must be present when it’s time to sign her birth certificate. You just can’t put anyone’s name down as father. Or are you planning on leaving that blank?”

Times were changing, but still being an illegitimate child had hardships. He didn’t know if he was willing to burden his daughter with them.

“I could say the father died.”

“You’d need a death certificate.”

“It’s not impossible to make one up.” Benjamin mused.

“Wouldn’t it just be simpler to have James there? Wouldn’t be simpler to include James in all of this?”

Benjamin looked up at his father and Montgomery saw the tears flooding his son’s eyes.

“I thought maybe, just maybe he would come. He would want to be here, but he didn’t. I can’t ask him to be part of her life when he doesn’t want to be.” Benjamin cried into his father’s shoulder.

“Are you sure he doesn’t want to be?”

“When he learned he was the father, he didn’t say anything. He wasn’t happy or angry. He just stared like a deer in headlights.” Benjamin rambled. “I could tell he didn’t want it to true. He didn’t want her – or us.” Tears rolled down his cheeks like raindrops.

“Oh, Muppet. It will alright.”

Montgomery leaned forward and wrapped his arms around his crying son. Benjamin gulped his sobs back, his thin body shaking with them. 

The door of the hospital room opened, and Lydia and Mycroft came bustling in. Lydia seemed to be in her element. She had a notepad in her hand and was writing out her lists as she spoke to a bedraggled Mycroft. Both alphas unaware of the scene in front of them.

“We will need the Bishop for the christening. Of course, it will be at St Paul’s. Also, I want announcements to go out. Let’s start with a hundred but expect the number to increase. The name on the announcements will be Gundred Matilda Charlotte Holmes.”

The baby let out a painful whine, being woken from her sleep by the sudden arrival of her exuberant and boisterous grandmother. Lydia frowned at the crying and baby and waved her hand.

“Alcott, deal with that.”

Benjamin pulled his child closer to his chest as he eyes grew wide in anger and fear. With a free hand he wiped the tears from his face, sniffling quickly. Aislinn cries became louder. Lydia growled and looked more directly at her son and granddaughter. He started to hyperventilate.

“Alcott give the child to your father. He was good at calming children down.” Lydia didn’t even notice how distressed her son was.

“NO!” Benjamin shouted. His face red and contorted by anger. He struggled to catch his breath.

Lydia and Mycroft stared at Benjamin as if he had grown a second head.

“What?” Lydia asked.

“I SAID NO!”

Benjamin started shaking as his face became darker. The baby was wailing now. As upset as her father.

“Well, there is no reason to shout.” Lydia criticized.

“Sometimes it’s the only way to be heard!”

Montgomery rolled his eyes. He stood up and walked over to his wife, taking the notepad from her hands. He took her by the elbow and started to walk out of the hospital room.

“You too, Mycroft.” He said was he walked past his eldest son.

Once in the hallway, Montgomery closed the door and turned on the two confused alphas.

“What is wrong with him? Is this some kind of postpartum depression?” Lydia disparaged. “Silly, emotional . . .”

“Alright, that is enough. I am putting my foot down.” Montgomery growled.

“What?! What are you talking about?” Lydia asked surprised by her husband’s abrupt manner.

“Leave Benjamin alone.”

“His name is . . .” Lydia started.

“Benjamin!” Montgomery growled. “He has always hated Alcott and so do I. He has requested we call him Benjamin and I agree. You have run roughshod over that poor boy for the last time. It is time you start being a parent instead of a dictator.”

Lydia’s mouth opened like a fish ready to take in a large gulp.

“Don’t even try to pull your alpha dominance now. Remember what happened last time you tried? If you persist, it will be you moving out not me.” Montgomery threatened. “This is not about you or what you want. Someone else needs must come first.”

Lydia’s mouth slammed shut with an audible pop.

“Our son is in there.” He pointed at the room. “He feels alone and overwhelmed and scared. He has no job and no home and a baby to take care of. He doesn’t know what to do next.”

“I was trying to help . . .” Lydia started.

“And you are making things worse.” Montgomery interrupted his wife.

“Daddy, you are mis . . .” Mycroft tried to placate his father.

“You are not helping.” He glared at his son. “You only enable her more. Together you are like a bulldozer destroying everything in front of you. With the same consideration and concern.”

Mycroft looked like he had been slapped. The color drained from Lydia’s face as Montgomery seemed to just be getting started.

“The baby is Benjamin’s daughter. She is a beautiful child and will grow up to be a beautiful woman. If you want to know your granddaughter, I suggest you start listening to Benjamin and stop trying to control everyone around you.”

“Monty?” Lydia’s voice was fainter and pained.

“This not the 1950’s and we are not our parents. We don’t get to dictate how our children live their lives.” Montgomery said. “I love you, Lydia Holmes and I always will, but from now on, my sons come first to me. And I will give them all the protection and respect I can. Even if that means I have to protect them from you.”

Tears were running down Lydia’s face. Mycroft looked like he was a seven-year-old boy who was just informed there would never be another Christmas.

“Monty, please . . ." Lydia looked down at her hands. “You’re not being fair.”

“Maybe . . . Maybe I let you run the household like a debating club. Your wishes always coming first. Consequences to others never considered. Doesn’t surprise me that our sons are unable to make lasting and meaningful relationships.”

“How could you say that?” Lydia cried, while Mycroft reared his head back and said. “That is wholly unfair.”

“The longest relationship Mycroft has ever had is with his umbrella. He works and for entertainment, he interferes in his brothers’ lives. Wonder where he learned to do that?” Montgomery looked at Mycroft pointedly. “Imagine how much better you would be at your job if you were able to put a human perspective on your decisions.”

“I have no illusion to what you are talking about, father.” Mycroft said trying to sound aloof but failing.

“Really. You agreed to help not one but both of your brothers in faking their deaths. Disregarding the pain and suffering you would cause their friends and loved ones. You’ve barred everyone from Benjamin. He doesn’t know that James has been looking for him. No wonder he feels abandoned and alone.”

“We decided it was best if Bond was kept away.” Mycroft said.

“We? You mean your mother and you. You never listened to me or your brothers. Don’t you think Sherlock is very aware of the damage such fabrications can cause. John barely took him back. I can’t believe you could be so heartless.”

Mycroft bowed his head and looked ashamed. Montgomery turned back to his wife.

“Sherlock is brilliant but untouchable. The only thing he craved more than solving puzzles was drugs. Never could connect with another human being before John. And personally, I don’t know how John puts up with him. And now Benjamin . . . He would rather struggle and do this alone than try and ask for help from the father of his child. Not because there is anything wrong with James, but because he thinks he is not worthy of James’ affection. He loves James but won’t let the man know it. He thinks he is undeserving of James.”

“Monty . . . I didn’t even know he cared about James.” Lydia said with her head bowed.

“Did you think to ask?”

“But he is just . . .” She waved her hand dismissively.

Montgomery growled at his wife. “He’s human and not a Holmes?”

The woman was too ashamed to even answer her husband. Her eyes glanced to see that a small crowd of nurses and hospital staff had heard the dressing down that she and her son had received. Her embarrassment grew.

She blinked the tears from her eyes and looked back up into her husband’s stern face. “I am the alpha of this family.”

“Then act like the alpha. Protect and provide. Not dominate and subjugate.”

She pulled her shoulders back. “I will go and arrange . . .”

Montgomery tipped his chin down and glared harder at his wife. She could see his jaw flex angrily. She hesitated then nodded.

“I will wait until Al . . . until Benjamin is stronger and listen to his wishes. Then we, Mycroft and I, we will do whatever we can to fulfill those wishes.”

Montgomery’s glare lightened slightly. He turned and looked at his oldest. “Mycroft?”

“Yes, whatever Benjamin needs we will provide. He needn’t worry now.”

“Then I recommend you go in there and repeat to Benjamin what you just said. Then leave and let him and his daughter – our granddaughter – get some rest. He has a lot to deal with and will need to be prepared to face it.” Montgomery ordered.

“But not alone.” Lydia offered.

Montgomery softened slightly more, “No, not alone.”

Montgomery opened the door. The three reentered the room. The baby was cooing softly in Benjamin’s arms. He pulled the baby closer to him. His eyes were red from crying.

Lydia looked at her son as if it was the first time she had ever seen him. A wave of guilt came over her when she realized what she perceived as respect was actually fear. She paused a moment, glancing at her mate. Montgomery stepped over to stand beside his son. She fortified her resolve.

“Your father and I have discussed what we should do.” She started. She hesitated and looked at Mycroft. Her eldest closed his eyes and bowed his head. “We feel you should decide what you need to do about yourself and your daughter. Al . . .” she stumbled. “Benjamin, if you wish, we will have a room for you and our granddaughter at our house or you can return to the cottage.”

Benjamin’s heart started pounding in his chest.

“If I may suggest, Benjamin, if you choose to return to the cottage, you will need assistance. Newborns are very demanding of attention,” interrupted Mycroft. “My maid Roberta is quite devoted to you. She has been very worried about you and the baby. I would be very happy to send Roberta with you to the cottage. I don’t need two maids and she would very delighted to help you. But only if you want her to be there.”

Roberta was the only member of Mycroft’s household that Benjamin liked. She was an older beta who was kind and funny.

“You will need help with a newborn, dear,” Lydia said. “Someone to wash nappies and cook meals.”

Benjamin made of sound that was halfway between a sob and laugh. The idea of feeding himself while trying to take care of his baby never even occurred to him. He doubted he could get by on tea and biscuits, but he couldn’t let her out of his arms just to cook.

“But those are decisions for later,” Lydia said. “Right now, you and my granddaughter need to rest. Do you want me to put her back into her bassinet so you can nap?”

Lydia took two steps towards the bed, but Benjamin twisted away from his mother.

“No,” he said quickly. Then regretting how harsh he sounded, he gave his mother a weak smile. “I just want to hold her for a little longer, then I’ll lay her down for a nap.”

Lydia seemed confused what to do next. She glanced back and forth between her sons and Montgomery. Her mate easily caught on to what was troubling her.

He leaned over and kissed Benjamin’s temple. “We will leave you alone. Get some rest and later we discuss what you want to do next.”

Benjamin nervously nodded his head and gave his father a lopsided smile. Lydia hesitated but came closer and kissed Benjamin’s forehead. Something she hadn’t done since he was a child and rarely did it then.

“Rest, please, Benjamin. I do really love you. Both of you.” Her voice brittle as glass.

Benjamin blinked away another tear as he watched his parents leave. He glanced at Mycroft who was still standing ramrod straight in the corner.

“At a later date I believe we will need to have a talk.” Mycroft said. Benjamin felt the reoccurring dread of a lecture. “Before you say no, the topic of conversation will be how I have failed you as a brother.”

Benjamin was stunned.

Mycroft, not expecting his brother to say anything, quickly left the room. The hospital door hissing as it closed behind him.

~Q~

_“I hate my name.” Benjamin said. _

_Benjamin and James were walking through Hyde Park. It was a Sunday afternoon and the park was full of visitors. Families picnicking on the lawns and couples sitting on the park benches. Benjamin and James strolled along the Serpentine, watching the swans drift slowly along with them. It was peaceful and for a brief moment the two could forget who they really were. _

_“Benjamin?” James asked. _

_“No, my real name. The one my family calls me by, Alcott.” _

_“It’s not that bad. I’ve heard worse.” James smirked. _

_“I was named for a great grandfather who was the worst kind of imperialist. Responsible for the deaths of hundreds of innocent Chinese. My mother felt I needed more substantial name to be a successful member of society.” Benjamin waved his hand expressing a grandiose attitude. _

_“Has she met you?” James teased._

_“You would think, no.” _

_They walked further along the path, just enjoying each other’s company. _

_“My mother chose my name too.” James said. _

_“James?” _

_“Yes. My father wanted a more Scottish name. Something like Ian, but she insisted on James. She thought it sounded more regal.” _

_Benjamin laughed and leaned over to lightly kiss James’ cheek. “King James?” _

_“She always called me her ‘little prince’.” James sounded melancholy. Benjamin heard it. _

_“Do you remember much about her?” He asked. _

_“Some. I remember the day they left for Switzerland. She was wearing a blue wool coat. Her hair was pulled back off her face.” James said as he slipped his hand around Benjamin’s. Their fingers intertwining. _

_“What about before?” _

_“I remember she always made me happy.” James said. “I felt safe around her. I knew she would take care of me.” James lifted their joined hands and kissed the back of Benjamin’s. “Like you do.” _

~Q~

Benjamin smiled at his daughter. “I promise to always make you feel safe and loved.” 

The little baby mewed softly in his arms.

“And I know your name now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and commenting.


	16. Introductions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James finally meets his daughter.

October 2019

Bond wore his best suit; it was tailored to fit his physique perfectly when he was unarmed. He felt that today he should leave his weapon at home. He stood staring at the large oak door in front of him. The house was Georgian, two story and boxy, with matching windows on each level and multiple chimneys dotted across the roof. The house probably had over two dozen rooms in it. It sat in the middle of fifteen acres, set back from the country road. Bond was certain at one time the property was larger, but over the years the land would have been sold off of various reasons. The house was white painted bricks and slate grey roof. The front door was painted bright red. The drive into the property from the road had a painted brick partition with a wrought iron gate; drive to the house was across manicured green lawns with low hedges and trees. On either side of the house, Bond noticed gardens. There were numerous rose bushes and flower beds. The flowers still blooming in the early fall.

Bond rang the bell for the front door, and it was immediately opened by elderly man. He wore a dove grey wool cardigan over blue tweed trousers. Not the normal attire for a butler. The elderly man stared expectantly at Bond for a moment, then a light sparkled in his green eyes.

“You must be James.” Montgomery Holmes said smiling.

Surprised by the strange greeting, Bond held his hand out to the man who was obviously the owner of the house and not an employee.

“Did Benjamin describe me to you?” Bond asked.

“No, not per say, but he said you had the most startling blue eyes and quite unique ears.”

“He enjoyed teasing me about them.” He gave his right ear a gentle tug, but he didn’t smile.

“Would you like to come in. I can have a pot of tea sent up to us.”

Bond glanced over the man’s shoulder and saw an elegant foyer leading to a stately sitting room. A large crystal chandelier hung over the polished wooden floors and Bond was certain the Gainsborough he saw was an original.

“No, I don’t think that would be wise.”

Montgomery Holmes looked disappointed.

Bond looked carefully at the man standing in front of him. He was roughly the same height as Benjamin. Bond would have sworn he had seen Benjamin wearing the same cardigan once. His wavy hair was steel grey but there flecks of ravine black hair running through it. His face had a healthy tan but had had the same sharp cheek bones as Benjamin and the same jaw line. Both men shared the same jade green eyes. Warm and inviting. For a moment, Bond thought ‘_this was what Benjamin will look like in thirty years. Still handsome, still someone I could be madly in love with’_. He pushed those thoughts aside as he reached into his jacket and pulled out a thick envelope.

“Could you please make sure Benjamin receives this.” He held the envelope out.

Montgomery Holmes stared down at it confuse. “Don’t you want to give it to him yourself?”

“Benjamin doesn’t wish to speak to me. And if he did, I doubt your wife and Mycroft will permit it.” Bond said without recriminations.

“I have disagreed with this from the start. When we learned Benjamin was pregnant, I told him to let you know.” Montgomery said.

James was surprised by the man’s comment.

“I’m sorry he didn’t take your advice. I would have been there for him throughout all of it if I had been allowed to.”

“Benjamin is hurting and scared. Mycroft and Lydia were only doing what they thought best, but sometimes, alphas get so fixated that they can’t see the harm they are doing.”

James felt a stab in his chest. Maybe he was so fixated on finding out answers about Benjamin that he didn’t realize what damage he had done. Maybe if he hadn’t burst into that house, Benjamin would have come back to him after a while.

“If I had known . . . if there is a chance . . .” James felt tongue tied by the jade green eyes that were so like Benjamin’s. “If you speak to him, please tell him I am sorry he didn’t feel he could trust me.”

James held the envelope out again and this time Montgomery took it. He weighed the heft of the envelope in his hands then looked up at James.

“He does love you, you know.” Montgomery said softly. A small smile came to the older man’s face.

James was surprised again by the man’s frankness.

“May I shake your hand, Mister Holmes?” James asked.

Montgomery slipped the envelope into the pocket of his cardigan. He held his hand out to James. James stared at the it. The fingers were long and slender like Benjamin’s. There was scratch across the back of the hand. Probably from the roses. James had seen a similar scratch on Benjamin’s hand once. He had cut it while working on some electronic housing.

James slipped his hand over Montgomery’s. He squeezed it lightly as he shook it. “I wish I had met you earlier, Mister Holmes.”

“Please call me Montgomery. I wish we had meet earlier too. I think we could have been very good friends. But there is time.” He smiled again. James was taken by how much Montgomery’s facial expressions mimicked Benjamin’s.

“It would be nice to think that, but so much has happened . . . Goodbye, Montgomery.”

“Until later, James.”

Bond turned and left. Montgomery Holmes was still standing in the doorway when Bond drove his car away.

~Q~

Bond was wearing his oldest dirtiest jeans. He planned on throwing them away when he was done with this project. His t-shirt had holes in it and the paint stains from previous attempts of home improvements. He was finishing the last touches to the plaster when the knock broke his concentration.

Bond stepped away from the wall and went to turn the music down on his stereo. He set the tools down and opened his flat’s front door. To his surprise, a nearly naked woman was standing in front of him.

“Hello?” He said, his eyes traveled up and down the woman’s body.

She was thin but buxom. Her skin was dark and hinted at Mediterranean ancestry. Her hair was dark brown or black, with soft waves that curled over her bare shoulders. Her legs were slim and hinted at a trim waist. Her feet were bare. A pale blue towel was wrapped around her body and clutched in her tiny fists.

“I need to borrow your phone.” She whispered.

James’ eyes moved up and down her one more time as he slowly smiled. “Of course.” He held the door open further and woman darted into his flat.

“I just moved in upstairs.” She said as she quickly glanced around the flat. “I was expecting an important package, but I needed to take a shower. I thought I heard the doorbell and I was only going to take a quick peek when my door closed behind me and locked me out.” The words rushed out of her as she looked around the room.

James waved his hand over to the phone on the counter in the kitchen. Clearly visible to anyone who was actually looking for it.

“And who are you going to call?”

“I thought about a locksmith, but maybe the management company? Who do you think will get here first?” the woman asked as she lifted the receiver and held it near her face.

“The locksmith would beat the management company, but neither would be her for at least an hour.” He still kept his attention focused on the blue towel wrapped around the slim figure. The towel was barely wide enough to cover the poor woman. The lower curve of her derriere was almost visible. His smile grew more predatorial. “You are locked out? I can help you there.”

She set the receiver back down in its cradle. “Oh? How?”

“You need your door unlocked. I’m very good at picking locks.”

She tipped her head slightly to the side and studied him. A crooked smile came to her face. “Interesting, are you a locksmith?”

“No.”

“Burglar?”

“Gifted amateur.” He returned her crooked smile.

“Interesting.”

There was another knock at the door, but neither of them moved to open it. Their eyes still fixed on each other.

“That could be your package being delivered.” James said coolly.

“I don’t think the delivery boy would knock on your door. It must be for you.”

James smiled again and turned his back on the woman. He went to the door and opened, wondering who or what he would see now.

It took Bond far too long to realize Benjamin was standing there holding a baby carrier. The younger omega had a bulky diaper bag slung over his shoulder. It was very reminiscing of Benjamin’s messenger bag with his computer. But Benjamin looked different. He was thinner than before. His face hollowed out and his eyes were dark with smudges under them. He looked beyond tired or exhausted. For a moment, Bond thought the young man might tip over.

“What are you doing here?” James asked.

Benjamin blinked and seemed confused by the question. “Well, I thought I was invited.”

“You’ve always been invited, but you seem to have ignored the invitation. Does your brother know you are here?” James didn’t step back to let Benjamin enter.

“No, he doesn’t but I thought we needed to talk.”

James moved back and opened the door wider. Benjamin stepped into the flat and saw the near naked woman standing in the kitchen. Benjamin turned a bright shade of red. He quickly looked away and ducked his head.

“I didn’t know you had company. We’ll go.” He turned to leave but James stepped in front of him, blocking his escape.

“Please don’t.” The woman said. “I was just leaving.”

“Dressed like that?” Benjamin asked surprised.

“This is my new neighbor. She took the flat upstairs.” James explained.

Benjamin gave the woman another fleeting glance

“Does she always visit you in the nude?” Benjamin asked. His tone skeptical.

The woman stepped forward, “No, I was an idiot and lock myself out. Ah . . . I’m sorry I don’t know your name.” She turned to James.

“James.” He held his hand out.

She juggled her own hands as she struggled to keep the towel closed around her. “Maria.” She shook his hand. She turned and held out a hand to Benjamin, but he refused to take it. Wincing, she dropped it. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to cause a scene. I’ll just go and . . .”

“Give me a minute and I’ll unlock your door.” James said. He retrieved a small leather case from the drawer in the kitchen.

Benjamin immediately recognized it as a set of lockpicks he had given Bond for a mission. The agent had claimed he had lost them. Another wave of resentment washed over Benjamin.

“I’ll be right back.” James said as he opened the door and escort Maria out. “Don’t you dare leave.”

He slammed the door, leaving Benjamin and his daughter alone in his flat. For a brief moment, Benjamin considered leaving. It seemed that James was moving on. That Benjamin was correct in his belief that James wanted nothing more to do with him and his daughter.

He was berating himself for being so stupid to believe that maybe things could be different. Obviously, he thought, they couldn’t.

“I’m sorry, darling,” he said looking down at his daughter. “I guess there is nothing here for us anyway.”

Benjamin’s hand was on the doorknob when James opened the door. The alpha saw the surprise expression that quickly morphed into embarrassment on the other man’s face.

“You were leaving?”

Benjamin ignored the question.

“I really didn’t mean to interrupt. I mean you can do whatever you want with . . .” Benjamin waved his hand towards the door. He could feel his cheeks warming in embarrassment.

“I just met her today. You didn’t interrupt anything.”

Benjamin felt sick. He didn’t want to be here, but he needed to understand why Bond did what he did.

“I just wanted to talk.”

“We needed to talk several months ago. Like when you learned you were pregnant.”

“There was nothing . . . well, it didn’t . . . Can I put her down? It may not look it but she is heavy when she is strapped down in this thing and I’ve carried it up from the cab and . . .”

James’ eyes flicked down to the carrier. He saw the pink round face of his daughter for the first time. James started to reach for the carrier but stopped. He frowned and stepped back. Benjamin noticed the aborted move and frowned himself.

Benjamin lifted the carrier with both hands and set it on the counter. He carefully undid the straps and freed his daughter from the carrier; cooing at her as he did so. The small child mewed softly but didn’t wake up. With the baby in his arms, Benjamin glanced around the room. He could smell the scent of fresh paint. The couch and chair were covered with drop cloths and a new television set was still in its box in the corner. A hole in the wall was patched with fresh plaster.

“Redecorating?” Benjamin asked as he glanced around.

“Changes in life demand changes everywhere.” James said. His eyes were still fixed on the child in the Benjamin’s arms. “Have you named her yet?”

“Aislinn . . . Aislinn Monique.” Benjamin whispered.

“Aislinn?”

“It’s Irish. It means dream. And Monique was for your mother . . . I thought it was appropriate that she be named after someone in your family.”

James’ eyes flickered up to Benjamin’s then quickly returned back down to the sleeping child. “May I hold her?”

“Ah . . . your clothing and hands.”

James looked at his dirty hands and stained shirt. “Yes, of course.” He quickly went into the kitchen taking his shirt off as he went. The worn fabric tearing as he rushed to remove it. He washed his hands with hot water and soap, trying to scour the paint and plaster off of them.

James came back drying his hands with a tea towel. He tossed it aside as Benjamin carefully laid the girl in James’ hands. Their child looked tiny in James arms. The small wrapped baby pressed against James’ bare chest. His large scarred hands gently cradled her head.

“She is beautiful.” James whispered.

Benjamin blinked back the tears that were threatening his eyes.

James leaned forward and breathed in the scent of his child. His nose lightly dragged up her cheek caused the child to coo and fuss in his arms. Benjamin stepped forward to take her back, but James twisted away and protectively wrapped his shoulders around her. James studied her small face. Memorizing every curve and dip. Her small nose and dark eyelashes. The round cherry blossom cheeks and cupid bow lips that were pressed together.

“What color are her eyes?” James asked as the child slept.

“Right now, they are a blue, but I think they will change as she gets older.” Benjamin said trying to sound calm. He didn’t want her eyes to change color, but he needed to keep an emotional distance from James.

“Does she like to eat? Is she a good sleeper?”

“She is ravenous. Not like me at that age according to my father. And she only sleeps for about three hours at a time. I haven’t had a solid eight hours since she was born.”

“You never slept eight hours since I’ve known you.” James teased but his attention was fixed on his daughter.

“It’s hard for me to get anything done.” Benjamin felt like he was floundering.

James looked up and finally seemed to notice the omega for the first time. He looked tired. “You could have had help if you only asked for it.”

Benjamin sighed heavily. “I didn’t need your help.” Then he shook his head ‘no’. “That’s a lie. I did but I couldn’t ask for it.”

Benjamin removed the envelope from his pocket. James immediately recognized it as the one he had given Montgomery Holmes.

“And I can’t accept this.” He held the envelope out to James.

“It is not for you to accept. It is not for you. She is my daughter and I am giving her half of my inheritance from my family’s estate. It belongs to her.” James nodded towards their child.

“I kept the secret you were her father so you could stay a double ‘O’. You know that if I accept this for Aislinn, then it becomes official that you have a child. You will lose your status.”

“My status as a Double ‘O’ is irrelevant. I informed Mallory and Tanner that I was Aislinn’s father.”

Benjamin’s mouth fell open. “You quit?”

“No, I took early retirement and will be transferring to the executive branch. I will be responsible for ‘technical mission evaluation’ next month. I was thinking about it before I learned you were pregnant.”

“You were? Why?”

“It was time.”

Benjamin stared wide eyed at James.

“But you loved being an agent,” Benjamin said.

“I was good at being an agent. It wasn’t what I love. I loved someone else.” James said, feeling bitterness start to settle within himself. “I guess I was mistaken in believing it was reciprocated.”

Benjamin’s mouth fell open. He stared at the man confused for several seconds.

“You never said anything.”

“I didn’t know it was required. I thought it was pretty obvious how I felt.”

Before Benjamin could say anything else, Aislinn stirred. Her brow wrinkled and her eyes squeezed tight. A small pathetic whine came out of her mouth.

Benjamin stepped forward and reached for his daughter. “Better give her to me before she really gets going. She’s always hungry after a nap.”

James ignored the man and twisted away from Benjamin. “Do you have a bottle? I would like to feed her.”

Benjamin blinked in confusion. Then held his hands out again. “There are some in the bag, but they are only in case I’m somewhere where I can’t easily breastfeed her. She prefers fresh off me.”

James glanced up and looked at Benjamin’s face. The younger omega was calm, but he could see the fear in the hazel eyes. Tears clung to the corners of them. James began to regret what he had said. He was still very angry at Benjamin. Angry and hurt. But he didn’t want to make Benjamin afraid of him. He glanced down once more into his daughter’s face then bent over and kissed her forehead before handing her back to her Papa.

“Sorry,” James whispered. He glanced around the room uncomfortably. He didn’t want Benjamin to run away again. “Please stay here. If you want, I’ll leave, or you can feed her in the bedroom.”

Benjamin pulled Aislinn close to his chest. The child was waking up more and her pleas were become more insistent.

“The bedroom.” Benjamin said as he turned and walked down the hallway.

“Do you need the diaper bag?”

James had already grabbed the bulky bag as he followed Benjamin down the hallway. Benjamin turned quickly and grabbed for the bag.

“I’m fine. I do this all the time. Just . . . please just give us some privacy.” Benjamin’s voice was brittle.

James paused as he stared at the younger man for a moment. The child in his arms was actively crying now. Loud and pitiful. Benjamin’s face was still a mixture of pain and fear. Not the expression James wanted to see after he was finally told the man how he felt.

But James hadn’t exactly said he loved Benjamin. He had used his own pain and disappointment to lash out at young man. It wasn’t fair and James wished he could take it back.

“I’m sorry. I’ll just leave you to it. If you need anything . . .”

“We won’t.” Benjamin said quickly as he backed up and closed the door between them.

Benjamin stood staring at the door expecting it to open and Bond to rush in. He wasn’t sure what had just happened. He wanted to try and understand what James had said. What he was doing by retiring early and giving a fortune to their daughter? Why had Bond admitted to everyone that Aislinn was his daughter? What did James mean that his feelings were obvious? Was Benjamin that blind?

Benjamin wanted to think about it, but his daughter would not be ignored any longer. Her screams grew louder as she struggled in his arms. Benjamin quickly sat down on the bed and unbuttoned his shirt. He carefully maneuvered his daughter up to his chest and she quickly attached. Innate knowledge controlling her movements.

Benjamin held is daughter with one arm as he grabbed the pillows on the bed with the other. He adjusted them against the headboard so he could lean back comfortably as Aislinn fed. Benjamin cooed softly at his child as he rocked her back and forth. The young child’s eyes were closed as her mouth sucked against her father.

Benjamin brought his hand up and smoothed it over her soft hair. The downy black hair was very fine and wispy. Like ‘gossamer wings’. Benjamin smiled as he began to softly sing to the child.

After a few minutes, Aislinn’s appetite waned and she stopped feeding. Her eyes were closed as she quickly fell back asleep. Benjamin rested her on his shoulder as he gently burped her. Laughing softly at the loud and very undignified sounds his lovely child made.

Benjamin laid Aislinn down in the middle of the bed. He grabbed one of the pillows and place it so he could lay down and look at his daughter.

Her face was angelic, and she had the Holmes’ coloring, but there was more. Benjamin knew how bright blue her eyes were. Just like her father’s. She also had his round head and broad nose. She seemed to have his temperament too. Benjamin wondered for a moment if she would be as lacking in self-preservation as James was. He smiled at that for a moment.

Then Benjamin noticed James’ scent on the pillow he was lying on. The spicy warm scent of the alpha. It made Benjamin’s mouth water. It had been too long since he had smelled that scent. Benjamin twisted his face and burrowed it deeper into the soft cotton. He breathed deeply.

Instantly, memories flooded his mind and body. The pleasure of feeling James’ body pressed up against his own. The nights they laid together in this bed just talking to each other. Their arms wrapped tightly around one another. The taste of James’ kisses. The feeling of being cared for and cherished by the alpha. Benjamin’s body yearned for the alpha. He felt so empty without James.

Benjamin rubbed his face against the pillow, lingering in the scent and sensations his memory was providing for him.

“I’ve made some tea for you.”

James’ voice brought Benjamin out of his daydreaming immediately. The younger man sat up and twisted his body to see Bond standing in the open door.

James’ attention was fixed on the sleeping child and not on the omega who was just caught shamelessly rubbing against the man’s bedding.

“Is she asleep again?” James asked.

“Yeah . . .” Benjamin answered looking away, while hoping that James missed the fact he was blushing deeply.

“Can we talk?” James asked.

Benjamin glanced back at his sleeping daughter. She would not stir for at least an hour if left alone. He arranged the pillows around her then turned to James.

“I think it’s about time we do.”


	17. Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and Benjamin are still too angry to be honest with each other.

October 2019

The afternoon sun was getting lower in the sky and light inside James’ flat was shifting to a softer shade. Benjamin sat on the sheet-draped couch looking at the patched wall opposite.

“Do I want to know?” He asked as he raised his mug of tea at it.

James’s eyes followed the movement over to the wall and he frowned. “No, not really.” He sat in the other draped chair, not trusting himself to sit too close to the omega.

Benjamin sighed. He wasn’t sure where to start. There were some many things that needed to be explained.

“You didn’t need to give half your inheritance to Aislinn.” Benjamin said feeling it was the safest place to start.

“It was appropriate thing to do.” James said evenly. No emotion in his voice.

“I am quite capable of taking care of my daughter.”

“Our daughter,” James interrupted.

Benjamin looked back at James. The blonde was still and unreadable. Benjamin couldn’t decide if James was going to offer him another mug of tea or murder him.

“Our daughter. As you can tell, my family is very well off.” Benjamin said. He blushed slightly and ducked his head. He had never considered his parents’ wealth as a benefit before.

“And you were worried about the mortgage and your two cats.” James actually teased.

Benjamin winced at being reminded of the comment he had made when James had asked him for a favor before they became lovers.

“Yes, I did.”

“And by the way, thank your cats for me. They are what tipped me off there was something wrong with your supposed death.”

“My cats?” Benjamin asked, confused by the statement.

“Guess your psychopathic brother draws the line at killing two cats, to put into the flat with the dead junkie.” James said coldly.

Benjamin stared at him for a moment remembering their confrontation just after James had learned he was alive. He paled remembering other things that James had said.

“You said you wanted to ask me to move in with you.” Benjamin shifted the subject quickly.

James didn’t flinch. He didn’t move at all. He remained indifferent and unreadable. Benjamin pressed further.

“You said that you loved someone more than being an agent. That you thought the feelings were returned.”

“We all make mistakes.” James said. Benjamin hated how detached James sounded. It was like he was commenting on the weather rather than their relationship with each other.

Benjamin bit his lip. “And I’ve made the most of the mistakes.”

James refused to let the words chip away at his anger. “Don’t ask me to contradict you.”

“The feelings were returned but I didn’t know you were willing to change for me – for us?”

“You thought I was some Neanderthal alpha that demanded my omega to accommodate my every whim?”

“No, but I thought being a Double ‘O’ was the most important thing to you. It never occurred to me that I would matter too.” Benjamin said. His voice broke slightly at the admission.

“Of course, you mattered.” The tone of James’ voice turned dark and angry. ‘_You still do, Benjamin.’ _the words stilled on James’ tongue. He didn’t dare say them out loud. “That is how this all blew up in our faces. If you didn’t matter, do you think I would have tried so hard to figure out what had happened?”

“I thought I could leave, and no one would follow me. I thought I was only going to be another of 007’s conquests who quietly disappear. It honestly didn’t occur to me that it was as special to you as it was to me.” Benjamin finally admitted out loud his greatest fear of being with James.

The words hurt. They hurt worse than a bullet or a stab wound.

“I haven’t slept with anyone on a mission in the last year. I haven’t had any other lovers since we started seeing each other.” James said fighting back his impulse to attack.

“But you accused me of sleeping around. You accused me of being unfaithful,” Benjamin responded. It hurt to know James thought so little of him. 

“You were pregnant, and you fled from me. What was I supposed to think? Immaculate conception?”

“I still don’t understand how I got pregnant, but you were the only one I’ve been with in two years. You’re the only alpha I’ve ever shared a heat with. You’re the only person I’ve ever trusted enough for that.” Benjamin lamented.

James realized that Benjamin didn’t know. He didn’t know what had happened to the two of them. He was just as confused and mystified as James was.

“Dr. Farris said it was a micro-heat.” James said apologetically.

“A what?”

“It doesn’t matter. The end result is we are Aislinn’s parents. And I don’t care what you say or what you do, she is still my daughter and I will be there for her. I will do whatever is necessary to keep her and you safe. If that means she gets half of the Bond estate, then she gets half.”

“You are claiming her?” Benjamin asked suddenly frightened that James was planning on trying to take Aislinn away from him. By law, it was the alpha’s right to claim their pup away from the omega. Or to claim both parent and child.

“As my daughter.” James said.

“And me?” Benjamin asked.

James hesitated and then shifted in the chair. Taking a moment to compose himself by crossing his legs and shifting his weight.

“Contrary to whatever you believe about me, Benjamin, I’m not a bastard. I won’t demand you to be my omega. It is obvious that you don’t want to be bonded. I honestly have not given it much thought.”

He lied. James had spent many nights thinking about what it would have been like to be bonded to Benjamin.

He continued, “Before you ran away, I wanted to ask you to move in here. I was willing to tell MI6 to go shove it if they opposed us. Yes, I will admit it to you. I loved you, Benjamin. I was devastated when I thought you were killed. But not as much as I was when I learned you didn’t trust me enough to keep you safe. You didn’t think I would protect you.”

Tears were running down Benjamin’s cheeks. He was the one being hurt now. He ducked his head.

“I guess we were both idiots.” Benjamin said.

“You for not trusting me and me for believing in you?”

The words stabbed Benjamin’s chest. James could see the pain in caused the young man, but his anger was such he couldn’t take them back. He couldn’t smooth the pain he purposely caused.

“So that’s that. It’s over.” Benjamin whispered.

Benjamin was crushed. He knew when he first planned to leave that he was going to hurt himself. He knew he was going to regret giving James up, but it wasn’t until now did he know how much it hurt. He wiped the tear from the corner of his eyes and tried to sit up but the pain in chest was too great. He rounded his shoulders and dropped his head.

James didn’t speak. He watched the defeated omega sitting in front of him. Benjamin shook slightly as the young man struggled to not cry. He could feel the draw of the omega, but his pride and anger wouldn’t let him move. It seemed the longer the two of them talked, the more pain they caused each other. This was not what the alpha wanted. He wanted to wrapped Benjamin up in his arms. He wanted to tell him how much he loved him still and how much he wanted them to be together, but he couldn’t.

The room was silent as the two men sat there. Physically, only a few feet apart but miles apart emotionally. Both men knowing they had failed each other. The silence dragged on until it became oppressive.

“Where,” James coughed as his voice caught on the emotion in his throat. “Where are you living now, or is that a secret too?”

Benjamin winced at the perceived sound of mockery in James’ voice. “I’m staying with my parents right now. I’m waiting to decide if I should stay in London or . . .”

He looked up when he heard James growl slightly. The alpha was kind enough to looked contrite for being over possessive.

“Do you want to leave?” James asked.

“No.” Benjamin’s voice was very soft.

James took a moment to rein in his feelings. When he spoke, he tried very hard to keep his voice even and non-threating.

“You don’t have to leave.”

“I don’t have a place to live and I don’t have a job. I refuse to live with Mycroft, and I need to take care of my – our daughter.”

“You have her trust fund. You could find a flat here and I could . . .” James glanced away. “I would like to be able to see my daughter often.”

“Could you get over your loathing of me to be able to see her?” Benjamin asked maliciously.

James’ head tipped back as if Benjamin had verbally punched him. He opened his mouth to say something cruel to pay the young man back, but the look of anguish in Benjamin’s eyes stopped him. They had hurt each other enough.

“Loathing is not the term I would use to describe my feelings for you.” He said softly.

“Oh? What would you use?”

James stared at Benjamin for a moment and was going to admit he couldn’t quite name the emotion he felt when a small pitiful cry came from the bedroom.

“Aislinn.” Benjamin said quickly. His body already turned towards his daughter’s cry.

Benjamin set his mug down on the new coffee table as he stood up and went to the bedroom. James wanted to follow. He stood up and trailed behind Benjamin, but the omega closed the bedroom door as soon as he entered, shutting James outside. The sensation of being excluded was overwhelming to the alpha. He grabbed the door handle but then realized that barging in would just drive the two of them further apart.

It was time to rebuild bridges. He took out his mobile and pressed the numbers.

~Q~

Ten minutes late, Benjamin came out the bedroom carrying a pink wrapped Aislinn in his arms. Her pale blue eyes were slowly glancing around the room and then paused onto James’ face. She smiled at her daddy and James felt his heart melt.

“It was just a wet nappy. She wasn’t hungry this time.” Benjamin said smiling down at his daughter.

He glanced up and saw James was transfixed by his daughter’s expression. James seemed oblivious to Benjamin; his whole attention was set on Aislinn.

“Well, I need to be going. I’ll catch a cab at the corner.” Benjamin said as he went to place Aislinn in her car-seat.

“No need,” James said as he came over to help adjust the straps.

“What? Why?”

“I have called for a car.”

James twisted and grabbed his windcheater. He slipped it on over his shoulders and zipped it up.

“A car? But we came here by a taxi, we can go home the same way.” Benjamin offered.

“No. I wish to take you back to your parents.” James stopped himself from saying _it is not your home. _

~Q~

As the car crossed over Vauxhall Bridge, Benjamin turned and looked suspiciously at James.

“It’s just a short visit. There is some intel that I think you need to hear.” James said.

Walking into the building, Benjamin refused to allow James to carry Aislinn. Benjamin held the carrier close to himself as he walked across the lobby and towards the lifts. His eyes shifting back and forth at the people there. The low hum of conversations didn’t change. No one seemed overly surprised to see the two of them there. The doors of the lift opened, and James stepped in. He held the doors open but Benjamin didn’t move. Benjamin stood there, staring at the empty lift, clutching Aislinn to his chest.

“Benjamin? It works better if you’re on the inside.” James raised an eyebrow at the omega.

Hesitantly, Benjamin stepped into the lift. His pulse rate rose rapidly as James pressed the button for the Executive Branch.

The door opened and Eve Moneypenny was standing there, blocking the door of the lift.

“I want to see her!” She demanded. Her hands out, reaching for the baby carrier.

Shocked, Benjamin actually took a step back but found James’ hand at the small of his back, bracing him. With a gentle push from James, Benjamin stepped out of the lift and into E Branch. Eve was smiling brightly and practically dancing. The woman was already fussing over Aislinn.

“Oh, she is beautiful. But of course, she would be. Look at the gene pool she pulled from.” Eve prattled on.

Benjamin hadn’t removed his daughter from the carrier he held tightly to his chest. He set it down on the Eve’s desk and carefully removed his daughter from it. He pulled Aislinn close to his shoulder as he stared wide-eyed at Eve.

“She doesn’t like strangers. Don’t be upset if she cries.” He said as he very hesitantly let Eve take Aislinn from his arms.

Eve cooed over the baby as Benjamin and James watched. Benjamin glanced quickly at James in confusion. He felt sick and wanted to leave.

“Is this why you brought me here? For Eve to meet Aislinn?”

“No, but don’t worry.” James started to place an arm around Benjamin’s shoulder, but stopped. He wanted to give the younger man a reassuring hug but didn’t think the younger man would want it from him.

Both men returned their attentions to Eve who was presently making ridiculous faces at the bewildered child in her arms. Eve was smiling and speaking ‘baby talk’.

“Look whose ‘purdy purdy purdy’ as a pea! Oh, great big blue eyes and little button nose!”

Eve’s dark curls shook around her face with each exclamation. James pulled out his mobile and started to film the woman’s ridiculous conversation with the baby. Aislinn started laughing and Benjamin started to relax.

The door to M’s office opened and Mallory swept out.

Benjamin tensed again and went to reach for Aislinn. Eve whined as Benjamin took her back. Mallory stepped closer and looked down at the smiling child. He seemed to be studying the baby for a moment and said.

“Let’s hope she has your sense of self-preservation, Quartermaster.”

Stunned, Benjamin said. “You called me an idiot.”

Mallory looked up into Benjamin’s face. “And you were. But you were also correct.”

Mallory turned on his heals and marched back into his office. Eve was smoothing down her expression having regained her composure around the baby and James was slipping the mobile with its blackmailing video of Eve, back into his pocket.

“Get in here, Quartermaster. We have work to do.” Mallory called out.

Benjamin blinked his eyes several times before he felt the gentle nudge of James pushing him towards the open office door.

“You don’t think we ignored what you were saying, Quartermaster. There is someone out there trying to kill you.” James whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, these two will eventually get over themselves and finally have a reasonable conversation. Only a lot more is going to happen first. I said there was going to be a spy story included in all these tears.


	18. MI6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The spy portion of the story. It's a James Bond story, we had to have some spying in it. Also a break from all the emotions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not have a background in computers, so I know nothing about hacking or backdoors or identification thief. Please suspend your disbelief for this portion of the story.

October 2019

Hesitantly, Benjamin and Aislinn followed Mallory into his office. Benjamin was surprised to see Bill Tanner and Daniella. The older woman immediately stepped forward and hugged Benjamin with one arm, careful to not crush Aislinn.

“I’m so happy to see you are safe. But when this is over, we are going to have a talk about keeping secrets.” She growled softly at him.

Confused Benjamin nodded his head. Daniella guided Benjamin and Aislinn over to Mallory’s couch. Benjamin sat down and James sat down beside him. Mallory and Daniella sat in the two leather wingchairs and Tanner brought over a desk chair to sit down in.

Mallory looked down at Aislinn in Benjamin’s arms and frowned. “Do you have to have her here? I mean, can’t she wait in the outer office? This is a top-secret mission.”

Benjamin glanced quickly at James and saw the alpha staring coldly at Mallory. He turned back and said.

“Our daughter will stay with us.” Benjamin started to reach for James’ hand but hesitated. The alpha noticed the aborted move and reached over and took Benjamin’s hand, squeezing it lightly. Feeling reassured, Benjamin continued. “Whatever you need to say to me you can say in front of her. I assure you she is not a security risk.”

Mallory realized the mistake he made and looked awkwardly at the others in the meeting. “Well, yes of course, she isn’t a security risk, I just meant . . .”

“Sir, it would be better if she stayed with me. She won’t get upset and start crying and I would be better able to focus on what you need me to do.” Benjamin said calmly. He felt James lightly squeeze his hand and knew he had said the right thing.

“Alright, Tanner, begin.” Mallory said wanting to drop the subject of the baby’s presence.

“To start with, I would like to say that I am very please to know that you are alive, Q. I was very hurt that you deceived us, but after what Bond and Daniella have discovered, I understand and agree with what you did.”

Benjamin was surprised. He struggled to keep his mouth shut because his jaw wanted to drop open. Tanner continued.

“You were correct in believing that someone was hunting you.”

“Who?” Benjamin asked.

“We don’t know yet. Daniella, please.” Tanner turned to the older woman.

“Bond came to me two months ago, after your . . . resurrection from the dead and told me you felt someone had targeted you and three other executives from different agencies.” She handed out files to each of the men. “Bond said you were afraid there was a mole within MI6 who was relaying information back to the killers. You also thought our computer network had been compromised. And you didn’t trust MI6 to keep you safe because of that. None of this information has been placed on MI6 servers. Everything I’m giving you is hard copy and not digitally stored, so don’t lose it.”

Benjamin nodded his head. He didn’t realize that Bond took him seriously enough relay the information.

“You thought that maybe we had been hacked?” Daniella asked.

“Yes.”

“I did a routine inspection and found nothing. I followed that with system by system analysis and found nothing wrong. The firewalls were intact. Everything was working as it should. There was no indication that we missed a breach.” She paused. Benjamin felt like he was about to accused of paranoia. “But I did find an anomaly.”

“Where?” Benjamin asked.

“In one of the base commands. Just a few lines of code that I knew hadn’t been there before. It was like a thumbprint. I believe it was indication of a backdoor. And if it was, whoever it was has been in and out of servers for two months.” Daniella said.

The air seemed to rush out of the room. Everyone glanced at each other. Two months of being hacked was a very long time.

“Are you certain?” Mallory asked.

“The anomaly first appeared the tenth of February. It was there. Then it appeared again about two days later. Then every day after that for two months. Then nothing.” Daniella explained. “

“What do you mean nothing?” Tanner asked.

“There were no more intrusions recorded. I couldn’t find the foreign code. They appear to have a backdoor into our servers and they quit using it.”

“When exactly in April, did they quit using it?” Mallory asked.

“One week after the Quartermaster’s death was reported.” Daniella said. “They were in there once after the report was released then once after the memorial service, then nothing.”

“Alright, so our servers were hacked. Do we know where they went? What they were looking for?”

Daniella glanced at Benjamin and frowned. “Mostly into the Quartermaster’s personnel record and private work files.”

Benjamin felt his stomach drop. He pulled Aislinn closer to himself to protect her from an invisible foe.

“There were other files corrupted but most of them had to do with the Quartermaster.” Daniella said.

“But Q, you said you couldn’t trust MI6 directly.” Tanner said turning to Benjamin.

Before Benjamin could answer him, Daniella spoke. “There is.”

Everyone turned their attention back to her. “The intrusions have increased again. It started the day Bond brought the Quartermaster into Medical.”

“Coincidence?” Mallory asked.

“No, it happened within hours of Q’s arrive here. And it has continued, almost daily since then. Someone is looking for him,” Daniella explained. “The only way the hackers would know that Q was alive was if someone from here, who heard Q had been brought in, told them.”

Mallory hissed and frowned. “Well, with the various lines of gossip around here it could be practically anyone.”

“That is very true, but I decided to look at individuals who were hired between nineteen months ago up to Q’s reappearance.” Daniella said. “If you look at the next page in the report you will see three names. Those are the only individuals that fit those dates.”

Benjamin glanced at the names. He didn’t recognize any of them. One was a security guard, one was an analyst in satellite recon and the third was a janitor.

“Anything suspicious in their employment background checks?” Mallory asked looking over the names.

“No, not glaring.” Tanner said as reviewed the three names with his tablet.

“I haven’t found any connections to known cybercriminals.” Daniella said.

“What is their work schedule?” James asked. “Were any of them working the day I brought Q in here?”

Tanner looked confused by the comment then glanced down at the names again.

“Eddy Wright didn’t report to Maintenance for his shift until after nine p.m. and Rebecca Corker, the analyst was . . .” Tanner reviewed his tablet. “She was out sick. Didn’t return until two days later.”

He looked up and straight into James’ face.

“That leaves the security guard, Anthony Garcia. He was working at the check point for Q Branch the day you brought Q in. He would have heard about Q’s return almost as soon as Daniella and her staff. He must be the mole.” Tanner said.

“I want a complete security background check done on him immediately. I want to know the name of the preschool he went to. Do a facial recognition search too. Let’s see if he is wanted anywhere else.” Mallory barked.

“What about the others?” Benjamin asked.

“Wright and Corker?” Mallory replied.

“Brian Mitchel, Moreau Daquin and Dimitri Popovs. They were all murdered.” Benjamin said.

Tanner frowned. “Q, I’ve read those reports. I just don’t see how they are connected.”

Q fought to not start yelling. He took a deep breath but before he could speak, Daniella interrupted.

“Bond told me you thought it was impossible for the equivalence of the Quartermaster of three different spy agencies would be murdered or die violently without the cases being connected. I hacked into the CIA Cyber-Division, the FSB and the DGSE.”

Everyone in the room was hanging on her words.

“I found the fingerprint in their systems too. Not as often but it appears, they were hacked for even longer than we were. At least eighteen months. The hacks were frequent up to the individual’s death, then rarely there afterwards.”

“So, what do the four of you have in common?” Mallory asked.

“I’m not a hundred percent sure but I believe it has something to do with the information breaches that have been going on in governmental agencies, like NHS.” Benjamin said.

“Explain.” Mallory replied.

“Dimitri Popovs wrote a report to the EU Parliament about an increase in hacking into governmental data bases by unknown group. Then Daquin had published a paper online about the lack of security of various information gathering networks. Networks associated with healthcare and social services. It said unless immediate action was taken there was significant chance that the identification of millions of people could be stolen. The identities could be used to create ‘clean skins’ for terrorist. These false identities could give terrorist easy access to a number of secure facilities.”

“What about Mitchel?” James asked.

Benjamin looked a little sheepish at the question. “I met Mitchel at a conference we had in Brussels three years ago. We were both interested in increasing the security surrounding our data bases. His wife had just gone through an identification theft and he was still very angry about how damaging it had been to them financially. We had discussed various methods of securing one’s identity or the networks they were in. He started working on a way to flag questionable information. When information provide doesn’t agree with previously submitted answers. A way to double check if the person is the same person who answered the questions before. I started working on new protocols to improve network security. Make a server nearly ‘unhackable’. I was using the same failsafe procedures I had already developed but instead of erasing the information being hacked, it was designed to send a trace back to the hackers with a nasty virus attached.”

“You were working with a foreign operative on project?” Mallory asked.

“We worked on the problem from two different directions. We only communicated occasionally to review each other’s work. I also only used my personal laptop. I never brought it into MI6 and I never connected it to our servers.” Benjamin insisted.

“And?” Mallory prompted.

“We were making headway with both of our projects. I was getting farther than he was, but he had developed an algorithm for detecting false ID’s.” Benjamin explained

“How would anyone know about this collaboration?” Mallory asked.

“I’m afraid, Mitchel may have spoken to a reporter from a ‘tech’ website about improvements in security after a resent hack into a credit card company.” Benjamin said.

“Did he mention you?”

“Not to my knowledge. He did say that there was work being done to improve firewalls, and gave a brief description of my work, but he didn’t mention my name.”

Tanner turned to Mallory. “That is why the family was tortured. They wanted to know who was helping Mitchel. They tortured the children to force Mitchel to give them Q’s name.”

Benjamin felt sick. He paled and his gut twisted. He had been the reason the family was murdered. Mitchel had tried to keep him safe at the risk of his family. Benjamin looked down into Aislinn’s face. He couldn’t imagine how he could allow anyone to harm his daughter. He would kill anyone who even terrorized.

He felt a squeeze in his hand and glance down at it. He noticed James was still holding his hand. He looked up into the agent’s face and saw the same determination and conviction in James’ face. 007 would eagerly kill anyone who even dare threaten their daughter.

Mallory sighed heavily and leaned forward in his chair. “So, let’s summarize what we know. For eighteen months someone has been able to enter into the data bases of the security agencies around the world. They had eliminated key individuals that could identify them and block their access. For the purpose of – what – obtaining personal information to create false identities?”

“As mentioned before, sir. Those false identities could be used to create ‘clean skins’ for terrorists, but given the magnitude of the possible breaches, I believe it is heading towards something else.” Tanner said.

“What?” Mallory asked.

“If there is a worldwide loss of confidence in identity protection and security, then any type of computerize business and banking would be compromised. Simple transactions would have to revert to face to face meeting with tangible assets. International trade would be considered unreliable. Western domination of global markets would cease. Worldwide financial collapse is a possibility.” Tanner explained.

Everyone sat quietly as they tried to take in the ramification of the damage a few lines of code could do.

“Time?” Mallory asked. 

“There is no way of telling,” Daniella said. “They could be starting tomorrow, or they may already be the systems.”

“No, I don’t think so.” Benjamin said. Everyone turned and looked at him. “If their goal is to acquire personal information, then they wouldn’t be going around killing people and bring attention to themselves. If their goal is to bring distrust into the identity protection and security, then they don’t need to be concealed. They would want people to know that the system is compromised.”

“You’re saying that they haven’t actually hacked into the data bases for personal information yet because they want people to know they’ve hacked into the data bases?” Mallory asked confused.

“The hack into those systems will be less elegant. More visible and evident. Since nothing has been detected then nothing has happened yet.”

“Can you use your new protocols to protect those data bases?” Mallory asked.

“It would help them, but we can’t go around re-enforcing every firewall in the world. And we can’t do it without permission from the owners of the various servers.” Benjamin said coolly.

“What about the most sensitive ones?” James asked. “What about those that Daquin identified?”

“That’s a start and many of those are governmental agencies.” Benjamin said.

Mallory nodded his head. “Very good, we have a starting point. I want Garcia arrested as soon as he enters the building. I want a complete background check done on him. Daniella, I want you to have written plan of how to protect the most sensitive and unsecure networks within Great Britain today. And tomorrow we will take everything we’ve learned to the PM. Understood?”

The four other people in the room nodded their heads in agreement. Mallory turned back and looked at Benjamin.

“What do you want me to do?” Benjamin asked.

“You are technically dead.”

“But . . .”

Benjamin was frustrated. People were finally listening to him and he wanted to do what ever was necessary to keep his daughter safe. Mallory didn’t seem to understand that, then he smiled at Benjamin.

“Welcome back, Q. It is good to have you here where you belong. But until we have Garcia and his associates isolate, you are still in danger. Bond, you are tasked with keeping the Quartermaster safe.” Mallory said.

“With pleasure.” James smirked.

“Thank you,” Q gave a small smile.

“And if you ever pull another 007 ‘dead but not really dead’ trick again, I will make it my ambition to make sure you never find a restful night’s sleep again. Do I make myself clear?” Mallory growled.

Benjamin paled and he coughed slightly, clearing his throat. “Yes.”

“Very good. Now get to work.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next two chapters are going to be very emotional. Be prepared.


	19. How Quickly the World Changes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benjamin receives some devastating news. Sherlock and Mycroft are going to have to deal with emotions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I said before, this is going to be emotional. Not as emotional as the next chapter but still . . .

October 2019

The meeting broke up and Benjamin stood up, Aislinn still in his arms. The small child mewed softly, and Benjamin frowned.

“What’s wrong?” Mallory asked.

“She is hungry, and I probably need to change her diaper.” Benjamin explained.

“Well, you can’t do that in here.” Mallory grumbled.

“You can use my office,” Tanner said as he opened the door. He had a soft smile on his face as he watched the small baby.

Benjamin thanked him and stepped into the room. James was going to follow him, but hesitated. He gave a questioning look at Benjamin, then the omega ducked his head and turned away. James closed the door and waited outside.

Daniella hesitated as she watched the two men. “You haven’t forgiven him yet, have you?”

James twisted and looked at her. His eyebrows raised in a question, but he knew what she was talking about. She didn’t wait for an answer.

“You know he did what he did thinking it was what was best for all three of you.”

“I don’t see how lying about carrying my child would be best.” James frowned.

“There is a reason why Double ‘O’s can have no connections. The dangers that family members will be used as leverage against an agent?”

“Of course, I’m aware of the rules. I think they are ridiculous.”

“Maybe, maybe not. Did you see the photos of Mitchel’s family? Or maybe he was too afraid to tell you because he didn’t want to feel like he was a burden to you.” Daniella said.

James looked confused for a moment. “Benjamin would never be a burden to me. Neither would my daughter.”

“Did he know that when you left for Russia? Did he know that when you brought him in here after he collapsed at your flat? Does he know that now?”

“I retired so I could claim Aislinn as my daughter.” James said confidently.

“You retired after discussing it with Q, or did you just go off and do it without checking with anyone.”

James wanted to say he would have spoken to Benjamin if the man had been around, but the truth of the matter was he never even considered Benjamin’s feelings. Maybe he was mistaken.

“He still should have told me he was pregnant.” James said trying to force the pain from his voice.

“He should have done a lot of things, but he didn’t. He didn’t think it through. Like someone else I know.” Daniella said.

James looked at Daniella for several seconds. “I’m sure you have something you want to say to me.”

“It’s never been easy on him.” She started. James felt like he should argue the point but couldn’t. “He was always treated like he was some anomaly and at any moment he would break down and start acting his age or his gender or whatever the chauvinists thought he should act like. Meanwhile, he kept one of the most difficult departments in order. You think the Double ‘O’s are out of control? Imagine a department full of geniuses or near geniuses with explosives. Last week, I found a group of them jousting in R and D with Segways and electric cattle prods. Two weeks ago, it was ‘Hot Potato’ with a Confiscator.”

A Confiscator was a non-functioning handgun that Q had developed. Its purpose was to be found during a search of an operative. Once in the hands of the enemy, the gun would send out an electrical charge and incapacitate the person holding the gun. The charge wasn’t lethal, but it was very painful. The idea of playing ‘Hot Potato’ with a ticking Taser made Bond wince.

“Q was smart enough to keep all of his minions under control and keep the agents alive. He is probably one of the most intelligent people I know. I’m sure he considered his options and decided on a course of action based on the information he had available to him at the time. If his information was inaccurate, maybe the fault lies with who was supplying him the information.”

James realized what she was saying to him. “You are blaming me for this?”

“I’m not blaming anyone, but it seems that the two of you are making decisions for each other without checking to see if there are the right decisions.”

“Well, he hasn’t actually been around for me to talk to.” James said defensively.

“He is here now. And more than anything, he needs to know that you will be here tomorrow.” Daniella said calmly. “He is scared, James. Scared for is daughter and scared for himself. But also scared for you. He cares very deeply for you, even if he can’t say it to you.”

This wasn’t the first time James had heard someone tell him that.

“Will he ever be able to say it to me?” James asked.

“Only if he knows it will be believed.”

James was stunned. He didn’t imagine that Benjamin would question James’ faith in him.

The door to Tanner’s office opened and Benjamin stepped out. He held his mobile in his hand. His face was ashen, and he stared down at it.

“What is it?” Daniella asked as she stepped up to Benjamin. She gripped his shoulders as if to catch him if he fell.

“My parents,” His voice brittle. “They’ve been shot. Someone tried to kill my parents.”

James stepped forward and took the mobile out of Benjamin’s hand. He quickly pressed redial and the phone was immediately answered by a familiar voice.

“Benjamin?” John Watson asked.

“No, it’s Bond.”

“Oh, good. Please get Benjamin here. We’re at St. Bart’s. Both of his parents have been shot. It doesn’t look good. Sherlock and Mycroft are here. Please hurry.”

“On our way.” James said. He disconnected the call and looked at Daniella. “Q and I need to leave.”

“Go, I’ll take care of Aislinn. There’s milk in the bag, right?” Daniella asked.

“Yes, I will give . . .” Benjamin glanced around for moment. “She’s sleeping. I’ve changed her and fed her. She’s sleeping and . . .”

“Just go, Benjamin. Go.” Daniella hugged the young man and then gently pushed him towards Bond. “Take care of him and give me a call when you know something.”

Bond wrapped his arm around Benjamin’s waist and pulled him from the office.

~Q~

Benjamin didn’t remember the drive to St. Bartholomew Hospital. His mind kept flashing back to the photos of Mitchel’s family. The dead wife and children.

The car pulled up to the entrance and James helped Benjamin out of the backseat. John Watson met them at the door.

“What happened?” Bond asked as John led them to the Trauma Unit.

“Mycroft is still trying to find out the specifics, but it appears it wasn’t a robbery or a forced entry. The doors were locked. The police believed Montgomery and Lydia let them in. Both were tied to chairs. Montgomery was shot multiple times.” John glanced over at Benjamin. He could see the young man was shaking and scared.

“And my mother?”

John held the door open of the Trauma Unit. His eyes flickered over at Bond then back to Benjamin.

“She was shot once, in the chest.” John said trying to keep in voice monotone. “I’m sorry, Benjamin, but it doesn’t look good.”

Benjamin stopped walking. James started to reach for Benjamin, but the omega waved his hand, making the alpha pull back.

“Is she still alive?” Benjamin asked.

“She was when I came looking for you. Second cubical on the left.”

The Trauma Unit was busy. Nurses and doctors were moving between curtained off beds. There was a low hum of voices and the occasional loud moan from behind one of the closed curtains. Benjamin walked forward alone. John and James stood by the nurse’s station. They watched as Benjamin hesitated before he stepped behind the curtain.

“You said Montgomery was shot multiple times?” Bond asked. His eyes were fixed on the curtain Benjamin had just walked through.

“Yes, three times. None of the shots were lethal, but very painful. He is in surgery.”

“Like he was being tortured?” Bond asked.

“I’ve seen the same thing done in Afghanistan. The interrogators would shoot someone in specific places to force them to answer their questions.” John said. His voice taking on a hard-hateful edge.

“Where was he shot?”

“Both ankles and his left knee. Small caliber. Maybe a twenty-two. Lydia was shot with a nine-millimeter.” 

“Two shooters?”

“Probably. The best way to get the drop on the whole house-hold.” John said.

“Where were the servants?” Bond asked.

“Tied up in the basement. One got free and called the police. When they arrived, the bastards were gone, and Montgomery and Lydia were bleeding out in the living room.” John said. “Mycroft is about ready to have a stroke. His surveillance teams missed everything.”

“They’re good whoever they are.” Bond said.

Suddenly, the curtain was pulled back and several doctors and nurses started to move away from the bed. Bond saw Lydia Holmes laying on her back. A ventilation tube down her throat. Blood saturated the bedding and her clothes. Benjamin, Sherlock and Mycroft watched as a doctor glanced at the clock.

“I’m calling it. Fourteen twenty-eight.”

James moved towards Benjamin as he quickly assessed the other two Holmes. Sherlock was face as unreadable as stone. Pale and taught. Mycroft was flushed. He had a tremor in his hands and his blue grey eyes shifted erratically from side to side.

Benjamin was looking down. His shoulders were slumped, and he seem diminished. James step forward and placed his hands-on Benjamin’s shoulders. The young man glanced up. His eyes were red but there were no tears.

“Benjamin?”

“She’s gone.”

James pulled the young into his chest and wrapped his arms tightly around Benjamin’s shaking body. They stood holding each other for several moment. Bond watched as the Trauma covered Lydia Holmes’s body with a sheet. Lydia was dead.

James pulled Benjamin away from the bed and out into the waiting room. He kept his arms around Benjamin, allowing the young man to morn. They heard the soft growl and looked over at Mycroft. He was forcing himself to stand up as straight as he could. It almost appeared unnatural.

“Thank you for bring Benjamin here in time to see his mother, but you don’t need to stay, Mister Bond.” Mycroft was still shaking, and his voice sounded forced.

“I’m staying with Benjamin.” James said trying to remain passive.

“No reason for you to. In fact, I believe it would be better if you left. Benjamin needs his family now and . . . acquaintances would just make this situation more difficult for him.” Mycroft tried to push his shaking hands into his jacket pockets.

Sherlock grabbed his brother’s arm and twisted it up behind Mycroft’s back. The older alpha gasped and hissed as his arm was painfully twisted. Sherlock stepped closer and whispered in his brother’s ear.

“I may not be high right now, brother dear, but I assure this is not the time to push me or Benjamin around. Don’t test us. You will find out you are lacking.”

John rushed forward but he didn’t touch his alpha. “Sherlock, don’t.”

James glared at Mycroft. “You don’t get to make decisions for Benjamin. He will make his own choices.”

Sherlock gave Mycroft’s arm one last twist before he released it. Mycroft swallowed a scream as sweat broke out across his forehead.

“This isn’t the time or the place.” John admonished the two alphas. “Your mother just died. Acting like spoiled bullies won’t help anyone, including yourselves.”

Mycroft slowly twisted his arm back to a normal position, wincing as he did so. He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped his brow. He stepped back from Sherlock and Benjamin.

“Quite right, Doctor Watson.” His voice betrayed his discomfort. “We need to start making arrangements.”

“You mean you need to start making demands.” Sherlock growled.

“Please, shut up!” cried Benjamin.

James pulled him closer. As much as he wanted to punch the poncy politician in the face, he needed to get Benjamin away from them. He pulled Benjamin away from the others.

“Benjamin . . .” Mycroft call out.

“Mycroft, I swear,” John pushed forward and into Mycroft’s personal space. He dropped his voice and growled. “Leave him alone. He is probably blaming himself right now and he doesn’t need your pompous intruding. The two of you maybe machines but he is not. Let him morn his mother.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” Mycroft tipped his head back to look down his angular nose at John.

“Then let me be perfectly clear. Leave Benjamin the fuck alone. If you go near him again without his permission, I won’t wait for Bond to kill you. I’ll do it myself. I would enjoy putting a bullet between your eyes.”

Mycroft paled again and Sherlock smirked. He reached his arm around John’s shoulders, but the shorter man shrugged Sherlock’s arm off.

“Don’t think I am happy with you either. This is not the place to try and break your arsehole of a brother’s arm. I realize the two of you are acting like complete idiots right now, so you don’t have to face the fact that your mother was murdered, but you need to quit acting like children. It’s helping no one. Especially yourselves.”

John glared at both brothers. Both men seemed confused and surprised by John’s comments.

“We aren’t ignoring our mother’s death.” Sherlock said.

“You aren’t? Then why aren’t you trying to figure out who did this? Why are you fighting each other instead of hunting down her killer?”

Both alphas looked ashamed. Sherlock ducked his head, while Mycroft seemed to, suddenly, be entranced by his fingernails.

“Oh, fuck you.” John growled and walked off. He needed some fresh air.

Sherlock watched as John marched off. His heart began to ache. John was right. He didn’t want to face the emotional tidal wave that was going to hit him once he acknowledged his mother was dead. He didn’t want to face the regret and anger and loss he was consciously aware he would feel.

He glanced sideways and realized his brother was thinking the same thing. Mycroft was fighting to quickly erect walls to protect himself from the grief.

Sherlock needed to keep the emotions at bay a little longer. He didn’t want to melt into a demonstrative puddle just yet.

“There is CCTV of the house, correct?”

It took Mycroft three heart beats to catch up to Sherlock. “Of course.”

“You haven’t reviewed it yet, have you?”

“I’ve left it to be examined by a trusted individual.”

“Hopefully not the same trusted individuals who were supposed to be responsible for surveillance of their house.” Sherlock said snidely.

“Of course not. I also have the initial police reports and the interviews of the staff. I can have them delivered here in half an hour.”

“Have them here in twenty minutes and I will let you make the first deduction.” Sherlock said as he shoved his hands deep into his jacket pocket.

Hesitantly, Mycroft turned towards Sherlock and stared at him. Sherlock was shocked by how gaunt and frail his older brother looked. For a moment, regret and fear swept through the younger alpha.

“What about Mummy?” Mycroft asked in a soft voice that was breaking with emotion.

“We will wait for our father to tell us what he wants to do.” Sherlock said as calmly as he could.

“But if he . . .”

“Don’t say it. Don’t consider it. We will do what we must. That is required of us.” Sherlock said quietly.

“Because we have to. We are Holmes.”

Sherlock nodded his head and turned to leave. He wished he had a cigarette to smoke. In lieu of nicotine, he went searching for John Watson.

~Q~

The surgery to repair the damage to Montgomery Holmes’ legs had been long. The surgeon struggled to repair the damage to the Montgomery’s left knee. The bullet had shattered the kneecap and severed many of the tendons and ligaments as well as the blood supply. In the end, his left leg was amputated. Montgomery was returned to the Post-Surgical Unit after three hours in surgery. Benjamin and Sherlock were waiting there for him.

Montgomery Holmes laid in the bed. His face was grey and pale. His normally full thick silver hair was flat and pasted to his round skull. Dark smudges were under his eyes and a blueish bruise marred the side of his face.

He was very still. Almost like he wasn’t moving at all. Benjamin watched carefully to see if the man’s chest was rising and falling with his breathing as he sat beside the bed. His father’s hand was clutched between both of his. Benjamin watched his father and wondered how he could ever be forgiven for being this danger into his parents’ life.

“Blaming yourself doesn’t help.”

The words shook Benjamin out of his trance. He looked up and saw Sherlock standing in the corner of the room. He had known Sherlock was there on a subconscious level but hadn’t acknowledged him since his father arrived from surgery.

Benjamin blinked his teary eyes and gawked at his brother.

“What?”

“Blaming yourself doesn’t help.”

Benjamin looked back at his unconscious father. “What else can I do?”

“What would he want you to do?” Sherlock pushed himself off the wall he had been leaning against. He slowly stepped closer.

Benjamin thought for a moment and gave a weak smile. “Probably tell me to go back to Aislinn and let him get some sleep. Or more likely, bring Aislinn in here so he could play with his granddaughter.”

“He is right you know.” Sherlock said as he paused at the foot of the bed. “He was right more often than not about such things. Remarkable given . . .”

“Given what? That he was an omega?” Benjamin chided back. He turned to watch his father again.

“Remarkable given that he always thought from a position of emotion and not logic. He let his heart make decisions for him and not his brain.”

“So now I get the lecture about sentiment being a defect. There is nothing wrong with using your heart to make decisions.” Benjamin said.

“John keeps telling me the same thing. I hate to admit it and I would never say it in front of him, but John is correct.”

Benjamin gave a weak little laugh. “Let’s mark this day on the calendar. You are admitting that someone was right, and you were wrong.”

“I never said I was wrong,” Sherlock stated imperiously. “I just said John was right.”

“Is there a difference?”

“Yes.” Sherlock said. “Just like you and your spy.”

Benjamin turned and looked sharply at Sherlock. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Sherlock took a moment to gather his words. He needed to make sure his brother understood him.

“Without knowing exactly where the threat was coming from and the fact that MI6 was compromised, the only logical answer to your problem was to fake your death and disappear. It would grant you the greatest amount of protection and those you left behind would be safe from any further threats. It was logical and correct and wrong at the same time.”

Benjamin’s eyebrows drew together confused. “Correct and wrong?”

“Yes, because it didn’t allow you to make a choice based on your heart.”

Benjamin shook his head and turned away. “I couldn’t allow sentiment to interfere with my decisions.”

“I didn’t either when I was faced with Moriarty. I let cold calculating logic dictate my decisions and I almost lost everything because of it. The thing I was trying to protect and to keep safe, I almost lost because I didn’t use my heart.” Sherlock said quietly.

“John?”

“Yes. He barely forgave me when I returned after faking my death. He only forgave after I begged him to. After I acknowledged I was wrong and that I didn’t take his feelings into consideration.” Sherlock gripped the foot board on the bed and steadied himself. “It was – humbling. I didn’t know how badly I had failed.”

Benjamin wiped a tear away from his cheek. “I did take James’ feelings into consideration. I knew he wanted to be an agent and if he had a child, he couldn’t be one.”

“Is that what he told you?”

“Well, no, but it was obvious. I thought it was obvious. Now, I don’t know.” Benjamin’s voice broke as a small gasp of emotion escaped.

“I don’t know anything about this spy of yours, but I know how badly I messed things up between John and myself. Bond is at least speaking to you. That is more than John was doing when I returned. Don’t be foolish and stubborn. And as ridiculous as it sounds coming from me – use your heart as well as your head to make your choices. If you don’t want Bond in your life or the life of your daughter, then tell him to get out. I will make sure he won’t bother you again. But, if you do want him there, do what you need to. Apologize and keep apologizing until he understands how much you care for him.”

Benjamin was openly crying. He stood up quickly and wrapped his arms around his brother. Hugging the tall thin alpha.

“When did you become so self-aware?” Benjamin asked as tears stained Sherlock’s jacket.

“I’m not. I’m just repeating what John has told me over and over again.”

Benjamin made a sound halfway between a laugh and wail. A barking gasp of emotion that seemed to encompass everything his was feeling. The two brothers held each other for several minutes. Each fighting their own fears of intimacy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two more chapters to finish up this story. The idea of the Confiscator came from a wonderful story by ff_fan "Then, the Whining School Boy."


	20. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies are finally given.

October 2019

Montgomery Holmes woke up two hours after surgery. When he asked about his wife, Lydia, he was told she had not survived. He quietly asked to be left alone and turned his face away from his sons.

“I will remain with him.” Mycroft said.

“Maybe I should too.” Benjamin said.

James stepped closer. He wanted to disagree. He wanted to take Benjamin home. Benjamin looked exhausted. He was afraid the young man was going to fall over at any moment from fatigue. He reached out his hand but halted it and pulled it back down to his side, defeatedly.

Mycroft and Sherlock noticed the agent. They noticed how protective Bond was but also how he forced himself to keep a distance from their brother.

“Your daughter needs you, Benjamin.” Mycroft said softly. “Our father needs to sleep. He will have a very difficult time once everything settles in on top of him. He will need us then, all of us. But not now. Now, you need to go home and rest and take care of Aislinn.”

Benjamin stared at his older brother. For a moment he wondered if Mycroft was up to something. Benjamin’s eyes flicked over to Sherlock. His other brother was tired but remained still as a statue. He was concentrating. Sherlock and Mycroft were planning something. Benjamin wondered if his two brothers had discovered the identities of who had murdered their mother. He wanted to be there when the people were caught.

He started to contradict Mycroft when he felt a hand on his arm.

“Benjamin.”

The voice was soft and warm. He had heard it before. On warm evenings as he and James shared dinner together before curling up in each other’s arms.

“Benjamin, Aislinn needs you. Daniella has texted me and said she is out of formula. She is waiting for us at my flat and Aislinn needs you.” James repeated as he stepped closer and wrapped his other arm around Benjamin’s waist. “I promise to bring you back here tomorrow, but right now, I need to take you home.”

Benjamin struggled for a moment then relinquished. He leaned heavily into James’ body. The familiarity of the sensation was comforting and consoling. He didn’t have the mental strength to consider why it was reassuring. Nor did he have the ability to register that James’ had call his flat, ‘their home’.

With one last protest, Benjamin raised his head and looked at his older brother. “You will call me if he needs anything. If he asks for me. If anything changes.”

“Of course, we will. Do not worry.” Mycroft pacified.

At that final assurance, Benjamin allowed James to guide him out of the hospital and back to his flat.

~Q~

Aislinn was sleeping when James and Benjamin arrived back to the flat. Daniella had used the last of the formula.

“I have a delivery of nappies and formula in the morning. I couldn’t get one delivered tonight but I think she will be fine now that you are here.” Daniella said as she carefully handed the baby over to Benjamin.

Benjamin nuzzled his daughter then looked up worried. “I don’t have a crib here.”

“Can’t she sleep in the bed?” James asked.

“No, it’s too dangerous.”

James thought for moment. “Alright, give me a moment.”

He wondered off to the bedroom. Benjamin looked back at Daniella.

“Thank you for looking after her.”

“No problem,” Daniella then did something she had never done before. She leaned over and kissed Benjamin’s cheek. “I love you, Benjamin. You’re my unofficial adopted son. I would do anything for you. And if you can’t work things out with Bond, then I promise she will be welcomed into Q Branch. Everyone of your minions would love babysitting her while you work. As long as you are working as our Quartermaster.”

Benjamin smiled weakly. “All is forgiven?”

“As if you had to ask.” She returned with a brighter smile.

Benjamin leaned forward and kissed Daniella’s cheek.

They heard someone clear his throat then James said. “Should I be jealous?”

Daniella laughed softly so as not to wake the baby. “Of course. Q has a long line of admires so you better not take him for granted.”

“I never do.” James said.

He opened the door and the three said goodbye one more time before Daniella left. Benjamin turned to James and asked him.

“So, what are we going to do about a bed?”

“Come with me.” 

Benjamin followed James back into his semi-lite bedroom. The drawer of his dresser was opened. Two chairs were supporting the open drawer. James’ vests and pants were kept in the drawer, but he had placed a terrycloth towel over the clothing making a snug mattress for Aislinn.

“A drawer?” Benjamin seemed aghast at the idea.

“Saw it in an old movie.” James smiled and carefully took Aislinn from Benjamin’s arms. He laid the baby down on the towel. Aislinn stirred for a moment then quickly fell asleep.

“Is it safe?” Benjamin asked.

“Chairs will keep the drawer from falling. She can’t roll out because of the sides of drawer. The clothing is the pillow, but the towel keeps everything enclosed so nothing will get over her face. And you are going to sleep right there in the bed, not ten feet away from her, so if something does wake her up, you are right here to help her.”

Benjamin hesitated then sat on the edge of the bed, staring at his sleeping daughter. James watched him for a moment then said.

“I’ll just sleep in the couch.”

“You could sleep here too – I mean if you want. It won’t mean anything.”

James hesitated. “Are you sure?”

“You’ve already done so much for us. And I know you want to be close to her. It’s okay with me if it’s okay with you.” Benjamin’s voice was shaking.

“We’re not going to . . .” he dropped off the final words.

Benjamin finally looked at him. “No. That’s not what I meant. We’re not going to . . . not when Aislinn . . . or ever again if . . . Damn it, James. I’m too tired to think. Just get into bed so we can go to sleep.”

Benjamin toed off his shoes and took his glasses off. He placed them on the nightstand as he turned off the only light in the room. He laid down on his side, his body turned towards the dresser with the open drawer and sleeping child.

James stood in the dark. He wasn’t sure if should stay or if it was more reasonable to go and sleep on the couch. But no one would every accuse Bond of being reasonable. He hesitated before he moved to the opposite side of the bed. He toed off his shoes and removed his belt; but he kept his other clothes on. He laid down on his back and stared up at the dark ceiling.

The two men remained silent for several minutes. The only sound was their soft breathing. After twenty minutes, Benjamin spoke.

“I never meant to hurt you.”

The anguish in Benjamin’s voice was palpable. James didn’t move. He held his breath waiting to hear what the omega needed to say.

“I would never want to hurt you.”

James remained silent. Benjamin feared he was speaking to himself.

“I love Aislinn. I love her with every breath I have. Every moment of every day she’s been with me, I’ve loved her. The only other person I’ve loved like I love her is you.”

James could feel his heart begin to pound in his chest. A crushing weight pushing down on him.

“I’m sorry, James. I’m sorry for all the stupid mistakes I’ve made. I was being an idiot.”

“We all make mistakes.” James whispered back.

Upon hearing James whisper, Benjamin twisted until he was facing James. Both men turned in the bed, so they were face to face. Only inches separating them in the darkness.

“I was scared. I should have trusted you. I should have come to you. Please forgive me for not telling you about being pregnant. Please forgive me for faking my death. For deceiving you. For lying to you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

Benjamin was openly crying. James reached for the younger man and pulled him into his chest. He wrapped his arms around Benjamin’s shaking body.

“I forgive you. There are things I should apologize for too, but I won’t for doubting you were dead, or for finding you. I won’t ask for forgiveness for giving half my money to our daughter because she is our daughter and I won’t ask for forgiveness for giving up being a Double ‘O’ because I want to spend the rest of my life with you. With you and our daughter.”

Benjamin couldn’t control himself anymore. He burst out a sob that was somewhere between a cry and laugh. He raised his hand to obscure his mouth as his vision burred with tears. He hadn’t realized how desperate he was to reclaim his relationship with James. He reached out for James and wrapped his arms around the man’s waist.

He had spent months, alone during his pregnancy, believing that James wouldn’t want them. That James’ plans didn’t include him or their baby. He had taken extraordinary measures to insure that James’ life wouldn’t be changed by Benjamin getting pregnant. And all for naught.

James wanted them. Even after everything that he had done and all the deception, James still wanted Benjamin and their daughter.

“I want that too.” Benjamin cried. He buried his face into James’ neck.

James leaned forward and lightly kissed Benjamin’s temple. He pressed the side of his face to the younger man’s head. It felt good to hold Benjamin again. It felt like it was how it was supposed to be. It also felt tenuous. Fear was trying to creep in around the corners.

“It’s not my place to say anything, I realize, but you said you had no where to live.”

Benjamin groaned softly and pulled himself closer to James. The older man took that as a reason to proceed.

“Before I left for Russia, I wanted to ask you to move in here.” James heard Benjamin gulp down a sob. “I was going to make an office for you out of the second bedroom. It wouldn’t be that difficult to make it into a nursery instead of an office.”

Benjamin pulled back and lifted himself up onto one elbow. He blinked as he tried to discern the features of James’ face in the dark. James kept talking thinking Benjamin was going to refuse him.

“Or if you still want an office, we can find another flat with three bedrooms. Or a house. Would you like a house with a garden for Aislinn to play in?”

Benjamin leaned down and quickly kissed James’ mouth to make the man shut up. It took a heartbeat for James to catch up to the younger man. He returned the kiss and wanting to deep it when Benjamin pulled back.

“Why?” Benjamin knew it was a stupid question. He thought he knew why, he just wanted to be certain. James may have forgiven him for the deception, but did he want to go back to being lovers?

The question took James by surprise. He took a moment to give as honest an answer even it if meant exposing his heart to be broken again.

“I want to know my daughter. I want to have a relationship with her.” He said but when he noticed Benjamin expected to hear more, he took a deep breath and slowly released it. “I also don’t want to see you leave.”

“You want us to be a family?”

The word family was foreign to James, but the more he thought about it the more it made sense.

“I want to know the two of you are safe. I want to know that I will be here to see her grow up. I want to lay down with you every night. And wake up beside you in the morning. I want to know what it is like to not be alone anymore.” James said.

“James?” Benjamin voice broke with emotion.

James lifted his hand and cupped Benjamin’s cheek. “Yes, I love you, too. Have for a long time. And I love our daughter. From the moment I first saw her. Yes, we are a family.”

Benjamin collapsed into James’ arms. The two men kissed and then held each other tight.

“Tomorrow, we need to start making plans,” Benjamin whispered into James’ neck.

“No plans until we neutralize any threat against the two of you. I won’t let anyone, or anything try and take you away from me again.” James said. He reached up and pinched Benjamin’s chin between his thumb and forefinger. “And that includes your two sociopath brothers.”

Benjamin smiled and nodded his head. “Agreed. Don’t worry about Sherlock. If Mycroft tries, he will find himself on the list of known terrorists and arrested. I might even be able to get the Americans to ‘black bag’ him and drop him off in Guantanamo.”

James smiled and snuggled Benjamin closer to his side. “I like the way you think.”

He was going to say something else when he was interrupted by a loud yawn from the man in arms.

“You need sleep.” James said. “When was the last time you had a good eight hours of it?”

“Eight hours? About four months before I started working for MI6. But I don’t think I’ve had more than just an hour or two at a time since Aislinn been born.”

“Go to sleep now. I’ll keep you safe and I’ll take care of her if she wakes up.”

“Can you feed her?” Benjamin asked with a sarcastic tone to his voice.

“Well, I can take care of other needs she might have.”

James started to pet Benjamin’s hair and listened as the man’s next comment was distorted by another yawn.

“The nappies arrrr’ ni-d bag.”

James heard Benjamin’s jaw pop from the yawn.

“Sleep.” James ordered softly. He felt Benjamin’s body grow heavier in his arms as the young man finally relaxed. He relaxed himself. He knew together, the two of them would be able to handle anything MI6 or the Holmes threw at them.

~Q~

James woke to the sound of soft mew and grumbling. He waited a moment with his eyes closed to determine where he was. He knew he was on a bed and he was dressed in his clothes. Which was actually a good thing. He felt the weight of someone in his arms. Their scent was familiar; Benjamin. That was a very good thing. He smiled. Then he heard the soft cry.

Aislinn.

James quickly but gently, untangled himself from Benjamin’s arms and stood up. He went over and picked his daughter up out of the drawer just as the first real cry began to build in her little chest.

“Shush, shush, shush. Daddy’s here.” He held the little girl to his shoulder. He glanced over and noticed Benjamin starting to stir in the bed. A small pout pulled at the corners of Benjamin’s mouth. A wrinkle appeared across his brow even though his eyes were still closed.

James had Aislinn changed and in dry clothes when Benjamin finally woke and sat up.

“Wha’s wrong?” he slurred.

“Nappy change and I think she may be hungry.” James said as he lifted her up off the changing pad.

“Bring ‘er here.” Benjamin said through a yawn as he unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off.

“You awake enough for this?” James asked as his eyes took in the thin bare chest.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Benjamin grabbed a pillow and set it in his lap.

James handed Benjamin the baby and watched as Benjamin carefully positioned her. Within seconds, Aislinn had latched onto her Papa and was feeding. James stood, watching, entranced by the sight of the two of them. He was filled with a sense of wonder and pride. It was odd and yet very satisfying.

James’ eyes lifted from Benjamin’s chest to his face. He realized Benjamin had been watching him as he had been watching them. Caught staring, James twisted and turned his head away from Benjamin and Aislinn.

“Sorry.” He whispered.

“No reason to be.”

“Do you want some privacy?” James took a step towards the bathroom.

“We are fine.” Benjamin said. “It’s natural.”

“Not when I’ve licked and bit at those same nipples too.” James blurted out.

Benjamin laughed and it seemed to make James relax slightly.

“I’ll just use the loo.” James said as he quickly turned and left Benjamin and Aislinn alone.

He turned the light on in the bathroom and closed the door. He placed his palms down on the countertop and tried to slow his breathing down.

_‘This was happening. This really was happening.’ _He said to himself. For months now he thought about his life with Benjamin and Aislinn in it. He thought about what it would be like to have the two living with him. He had considered the changes it would bring and the changes he would need to make. But everything had been in the abstract. _If Benjamin did this then James would do that,_ sort of thing. But it was real now. Benjamin was in his bed and Aislinn was sleeping in his flat.

He took a moment to let it wash over him. He had a family. He was part of a family.

He waited for the panic to take over. The sudden need to flee or to deflect. He waited for the fates to suddenly appear and take Benjamin away from him. Hadn’t it been decreed that James Bond would forever be alone. An orphan with no partner. No mate. He learned to be alone. He liked being alone – until –

He glanced up at his reflection in the mirror. His image seemed older than he remembered. There were a few more wrinkles. An extra scar above his brow. His hair seemed to have more grey in it, than before. He waited for the anxiety to hit. He waited, but nothing happened.

_‘This was really happening,’ _and he was happy about it. He was overwhelmed with relief that Benjamin was in his bed and Aislinn was sleeping in his flat. This was going to be good – great. He smiled at the older man in the mirror. This was going to be his life and he was grateful.

He stepped out of the bathroom as Benjamin was putting the sleeping Aislinn into her make-shift bed. James watched as Benjamin tottered back to the bed. He unbuttoned his trousers and pushed them down. The omega lifted up the duvet and slipped underneath it. Naked except for his pants.

“I hate sleeping in my clothes. I can’t believe I fell asleep wearing them.” Benjamin said as he closed his eyes. “Com’on. Get comfortable and let’s go back to sleep.”

James took a step closer to the bed then stopped. A small voice in the back of head told him to keep his clothes on, but he agreed with Benjamin that they were uncomfortable. And the idea of sleeping next to the omega and being able to allow skin to skin contact again after so long was too enticing. He quickly unbuttoned his trouser and lowered the fly. They slid down his hips as he unbuttoned his shirt. He was undressed except for his pants in a matter of seconds. Sipping silently under the duvet next to Benjamin.

The young omega rolled into James’ body. Softly laying his head on James’ chest. James’ hands came up and wrapped around Benjamin’s torso. His warm palms splayed across Benjamin’s shoulder blades and the small of his back. Benjamin was warm to the touch and smell wonderful. James’ hands began to move slowly, mapping out the curves of the body he knew so well.

Benjamin threw his leg over James’ thigh. The slide of Benjamin’s thigh across James’ cause his prick to twitch and come to life. James brought his hand up and lifted Benjamin’s face to his. He kissed the younger man’s brow, then each closed eye lid. James kissed the edge of Benjamin’s mouth, then the plumb lips. A small sexy mew came from the omega as James licked at those lips. Benjamin opened his mouth was welcomed James’ tongue entrance.

A fire banked low within James started to burn more brightly. He had forgotten how delicious the younger man tasted. The scent of baking cookies and tea filled his senses. His hand moved from Benjamin’s face and smoothed down the man’s side. It swept lower and around to the pert backside. James’ hand slipped under the waistband of Benjamin’s pants and palmed the round mounds of flesh.

Benjamin moaned as James massaged his arse. The sound added fuel to James’ fire, and he pulled Benjamin closer. Rolling the two of them and pinning the younger man underneath him. Benjamin’s arms wrapping around James’ shoulders as the alpha’s thigh pressed up against Benjamin’s groin.

The kisses deepened and became more urgent. Needy. Demanding. James shifted and started to kiss and nip down the side of Benjamin’s jaw. His own hardened length pressed against Benjamin’s thigh. His body starting to undulate over the omega.

“James . . .” Benjamin’s voice was raspy. 

The alpha growled.

“James . . . we can’t.”

James bit down on the muscle just below Benjamin’s ear. The young man gasped and arched up into James.

“James . . .”

The alpha flattened his tongue and licked over the bruised flesh.

“Aislinn.”

Somewhere in the back of the alpha’s head the name registered.

“She’s sleeping. We’ll wake her.”

James shifted and returned to kissing Benjamin’s mouth.

“She won’t remember.” James whispered against Benjamin’s lips.

“Please . . .”

James pressed his thigh into Benjamin’s groin and the omega groaned.

“Are you sure you want to stop?” James teased.

Benjamin shivered underneath the alpha, but gently pushed back on the man’s shoulders. Benjamin was interested. More than interested. He was hard and his body was responding to James’. 

“Not now. Later, I promise. We have the rest of our lives together.” 

James lifted his body and looked down into Benjamin’s face. He could feel the young man’s hard prick pressing into his thigh. He could smell how much Benjamin’s scent had increased. He knew Benjamin wanted him. He wanted the young man so much he felt drunk with it.

But Benjamin was right. This wasn’t the best moment. There was going to better moments to reestablish their connection.

James rolled off the young man and collapsed onto his back beside him.

“Tomorrow,” James sighed. “Tomorrow we turn the other bedroom into a nursery, then we sleep alone in here – together.”

“I promise.” Benjamin said as he rolled over and laid his head on James’ chest. “And tomorrow night, we revisit this.”

James lifted Benjamin’s face up to his. “Tomorrow night, I going to make love to you every way I can.”

Benjamin smiled and leaned forward to kiss James. “Promise.”


	21. The Final Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some one has come to murder Benjamin.

October 2019

Benjamin woke up with a wonderful scent surrounding him. With his eyes closed, Benjamin burrowed deeper into the covers and rubbed his cheek on soft pillows. He hadn’t woken up this happy and relaxed in months. He sighed and pulled the pillow closer to him, breathing deeply the heavenly scent.

Alpha.

His alpha.

James.

Benjamin’s eyes snapped open. James was not his alpha. Not officially. He sat up and remember he fell asleep in James’ bed. He fell asleep next to the alpha. They had confessed things to each other and made promises.

There was a flutter inside his stomach as Benjamin remembered what he had said. And a flush to his skin. He placed his fingers to his mouth where James had kissed him. Then he remembered what had happened after he had fed Aislinn.

Aislinn!

Benjamin glanced over to her makeshift bed. The baby was gone. Benjamin threw the duvet off himself and stumbled to the door. He rushed out into the living room in just his boxers.

Aislinn and James were sitting on the floor together. Aislinn in her car seat and James cross-legged in front of her. James was reading to his daughter. His voice soft and playful. It took Benjamin an embarrassing long moment to realize it was the directions for the assembly of an LMT L129A1 sharpshooter rifle.

“Don’t you think that might be a little advance for her?” Benjamin asked standing in his pants and nothing else.

James glanced over his shoulder at Benjamin and noticed the man’s degree of undress. A predatory smile came to James’ face.

“Not in the lease. She is enjoying the sound of my voice as I read about the range of fire and the sight modifications.” James easily unfolded himself from the floor and stood up. Benjamin watched as James seemed to stalk across the room towards him, sending a shiver down the younger man’s spine.

“Good morning, lovely.” James purred as he pressed a kiss to the corner of Benjamin’s mouth. “Your tea is waiting for you in the kitchen. I’ll fix you breakfast in just a moment. I appreciate the attire, but you might want to put on some clothes on before you eat.”

James’ fingers skimmed up Benjamin’s side. He smiled again when he noticed the shiver run through Benjamin’s body. Another kiss, less chaste than the first followed by slight moan from the younger man.

Benjamin closed his eyes and tried to regain control of himself. “I woke up and Aislinn wasn’t in her bed.”

“No, she was hungry and needed a new nappy.”

“But you didn’t wake me.” Benjamin opened his eyes. But his body swayed closer to the alpha.

“No. She woke me, and I brought her out here to let you sleep while I changed her. While I was doing that, Daniella’s delivery of supplies knocked on the door. I quickly washed up some bottles and mixed up her formula. She’s eaten and been changed, and we have been enjoying each other’s company while you slept.” James explained.

“You let me sleep?” Benjamin hated how slow his mind seemed to be working this morning.

“You looked like you needed it.” James cupped Benjamin’s face with his hand. His thumb lightly dragged across new creases in young man’s brow. “You said you haven’t been sleeping well.”

“No, yes, I mean I haven’t been sleeping well but you still should have woken me when she got up.”

James gave the other man a soft smile. “We are going to do this together, remember. That means I can change her and feed her and let you sleep when you need to. It won’t help her if you are too tired to take care of either one of you, will it?”

“No, I guess not.” Benjamin looked shy. “Thank you. I didn’t think I would sleep after what happened yesterday. I owe you so much for taking care me through that.”

James slipped his hand around the back of Benjamin’s neck and pulled the young man’s head forward. He pressed his forehead to Benjamin’s.

“We are in this together. Partners. Friends. Lovers. More. I won’t let you face it alone. I won’t let your power-hungry brother push you around.”

“He doesn’t mean to be so assertive.”

“Doesn’t he?” James asked. “Has he ever considered your choices over his own?”

Benjamin didn’t want to answer that question. Mycroft had considered Benjamin’s choices and that was how this whole mess started. But Benjamin would never have given Aislinn up for adoption and he would never had ignored the fact that someone appeared to be out to get him.

“What’s for breakfast?” Benjamin asked, hoping to change the subject.

“Not much, I wasn’t expecting company.” James said. “The tea is left over from when . . .” He paused and Benjamin realized what he was going to say.

“From before you left for Russia. Before I faked . . .”

“Don’t.” James leaned forward and kissed Benjamin’s mouth. “Don’t mention it again. It doesn’t matter now, and we won’t bring it up again. It’s over and we’ve moved on.”

Benjamin nodded his head. “Yes, we have, and I couldn’t be happier about it.” He leaned back into James and kissed the blonde. “But I’m still hungry.”

“Breakfast - I’ll go get us something. There is a café around the corner. They have some nice pastries and maybe can do a bacon butty.”

“Ooo, yum,” Benjamin smiled. “Hurry back. I want to take a shower before we have to go back to the hospital. Do I have any clothes here still?”

“Maybe a dress shirt got mixed into my cleaning, but I don’t remember. Go through my closet and find something that fits. Then after we are done at the hospital, we’ll go by your parent’s house and pick up your things.”

Benjamin suddenly felt a wave of sadness crash into him. His parents. His mother was dead. He had never felt comfortable around her – never felt accepted, but she was still his mother. Her acceptance of nothing short of perfection was what had driven him so hard to succeed. It was more than just being the smartest person in school or a successful software designer, or the youngest executive at MI6, it was trying to prove that he deserved her attention. That he was more than the condescending comments she made about him. He wanted a loving mother but instead had the force pushing him to be remarkable. People would expect him to be sad at her death. To grieve, but he just had regret. Regrets that the two of them could never be mother and son. Never be friends. That is what hurt. The loss of not the person, but the opportunity.

He looked down at his daughter in her car seat. She was smiling as she played with her toes. Her bright blue eyes, so much like her father’s, shined out with curiosity and intelligence. He knelt down and pulled her out of the seat, pressing kisses to her pudgy cheeks. He promised himself he would tell her every day he was proud of her and he loved her. He would also know that any love she gave him in return was a gift and not a requirement from her.

“I’ll ask Sherlock to go get my things. It’s probably still cordoned off as a crime scene and we couldn’t get in. He’ll love sneaking in and stealing my suitcase.” Benjamin said as he twisted back and into James’ arms.

The blonde eagerly hugged the omega and his daughter. His family. He kissed the top of Aislinn’s head and then Benjamin’s cheek.

“Then I’ll hurry off and get breakfast and you find something in my closet.” James smiled as he turned away from Benjamin and Aislinn. “I won’t be long.”

He turned back and looked at the two people he cared most for in this world. His daughter and her Papa.

James was locking the door and heading down the stairs to the front door in a matter of seconds. Benjamin went back and laid Aislinn down in the drawer. He smiled at her as she seemed to be fascinated with her hand. Watching it open and close.

Benjamin opened the closet and stepped inside. On the left side James’ suits. All neatly hung up. Various shades of fabric and styles of cut. All exquisite. None that would fit Benjamin’s narrow frame. He glanced at James’ dress shirts right in front of him. He knew from experience that the shirts would never fit correctly, but in a pinch, he could wear one under a jumper or cardigan. On the right-hand side of the closet was James’ more casual clothes. Jeans and jumpers. Some cotton t-shirts and more colorful button downs. Benjamin grabbed a pale blue dress shirt and a cream-colored jumper. Not Benjamin’s choice of color or fit, but James had complained the jumper was too small for him. Benjamin hoped he didn’t look like he was a child wearing an older brother’s hand-me-downs.

James’ shirt was crisp. Benjamin went into the bedroom and laid the clothing options out on the bed. He pulled his trousers on from the day before. He carefully slipped one of James’ vests out from under his daughter he who had nodded off to sleep while he was picking out clothes. He pulled on the soft cotton vest and tucked it into waistband.

There was knock on the door of the flat. Benjamin twisted quickly, wondering if James could have returned so quickly. But if it was James, why did he knock?

~Q~

For mid-October, the weather was still quite warm for London. James smoked a cigarette as he walked the short two blocks to the café. The pavements were crowded with early morning commuters heading off to work. The crowds migrating towards the local Tube station.

James dropped the butt of the cigarette on the pavement and toed it. He opened the door of the café and walked in. The owner was familiar and nodded to James. The owner immediately started calling out Bond’s normal coffee order. Bond gave the man a pleased smile and went to look at the offerings of pasties in the display case.

A young girl came over and stood behind the display case, waiting for Bond’s order. Bond was reasonably certain the woman was either the daughter or niece of the owner. She was short, barely tall enough to look over the case. Her face still had the roundness of immaturity to it. A softness to the mouth and a smoothness around the eyes. He doubted she was even in her twenties yet.

He looked over the offerings in the case and smiled. “Two palmiers and two of the chocolate croissants. And two bacon butty.”

The young woman raised an eyebrow at the agent. “Two?”

“Yes, two.” He could see the conspirator look in the young girl’s eyes. A sly smile came to her face. James simply smiled back.

She opened the case and started to remove the pasties he had requested. The mobile in James’ pocket vibrated and he reached for it. He glanced at the number and then stepped back away from the counter and inquisitive ears.

“Bond here.” He answered.

“We have a problem.” Tanner said. There was tension in his voice.

Immediately, James glanced up and around himself. His senses set to high alert.

“What is it?”

“Garcia didn’t make his shift yesterday. We went to his flat and he is gone.”

“Did he leave any trace of where he went?” Bond asked.

“It appears he was expecting to come back. His clothes and personal items are still there. So is a computer. We need Q to go through it.” Tanner said. “We do know where he is, though.”

“What?”

“CCTV has him and a woman entering the Holmes Estate yesterday afternoon.” Tanner said.

James felt a wave of hatred flow over him. He remembered Benjamin after his mother died. And Montgomery Holmes in hospital missing his leg.

“Is Garcia and this woman responsible for the attack on Lydia and Montgomery Holmes?”

“We believe so. We think the woman might be Garcia’s sister, Maria. She’s involved with hacking and has been arrested previously for extortion and currency fraud.”

Suddenly, everything seemed to become brighter. Apprehension pulsed though Bond’s body.

“Do you have a location on the sister?” Bond asked.

“No.”

“Description?”

“I have a photo I’ll send to your phone.” Tanner said.

In a matter of seconds, Bond’s phone pinged with the notification of an email. He opened the email and looked at the pretty young woman with dark brown or black hair falling loosely around her shoulders with soft curls. The same smile from yesterday.

Bond took off running out of the café. The owner was calling out to him as he held up a white sack of the bacon sandwiches and pastries.

~Q~

Benjamin was buttoning up the shirt he borrowed from James and rolling up the sleeves as he walked to the front door. The visitor was knocking for the second time. Hesitantly, Benjamin looked through the peephole at whomever was knocking.

He immediately recognized the woman standing in the hallway. It was James’ new neighbor from upstairs. Maria. The same woman who was standing in James’ flat the day before - naked with only a towel. Obviously, the woman had designs on Benjamin’s alpha. He was going to have to put a stop to that directly.

He sighed dramatically as he opened the door.

“I know you have a wonderful reason for knocking on this door again . . .”

Benjamin stopped in mid-sentence. The barrel of the 9 mm handgun pressed into his forehead. Benjamin fought the urge to cross his eyes and look up at the barrel. He kept his eyes focused on the man standing behind Maria. It was Anthony Garcia.

Garcia pressed the gun into Benjamin’s forehead and pushed the young man back. Maria closed the door and turned and smiled at him.

“You have been hard to get alone, Mister Holmes. We are alone, aren’t we?” Maria glanced around the room.

Benjamin plead silently to his daughter. ‘_Stay asleep. Don’t make a sound!’ _

“Yes.”

“Where is Bond and the brat?” Maria asked.

“They went out to breakfast.” Benjamin forced himself to remain still and calm.

“Without you?”

“Yes.”

“We’ve been looking for you all over the place.” Maria teased.

“I’ve been dead.” Benjamin said as coolly as he could. Maria laughed.

“So we were told. Very cleaver of you. You should have stayed dead.” Maria said.

“Imagine my surprise when I heard Bond had brought you into MI6.” Garcia said. “I couldn’t wait to tell Maria.”

“You told Bond that you lived with your parents.” Maria said. She stepped closer and stared up into Benjamin’s face.

Confused, Benjamin said, “We were alone. He didn’t tell anyone that what I said.”

Maria smiled like a shark. Benjamin stared at her then over to the counter and phone she had used the day before.

“You planted a bug.” He simply said.

“A very expensive and small listening devise. Our boss provided it to me. We thought you would call Bond, or he would contact you. Imagine my surprise to find you here when I came to plant the device.”

“Why were you naked?” Benjamin asked.

“Deflection,” she waved her hand.

She stepped back away from Benjamin and started to look around the room. She paused and looked down the hallway towards the bedrooms. Fear shot through Benjamin as he thought she would wander down the hall and find the sleeping baby.

“No one thinks a naked woman would be there to spy. To plant a bug.” Benjamin said.

“Of course. You thought I was there for something else, so you never noticed me plant the device.” She stepped away from the hallway and over to the kitchen counter. She picked up the phone and turned it over. A small black square was attached to the underside of the phone. If you didn’t know what you were looking at, it appeared to be part of the assembly.

“You said you thought I was living with my parents. You were there.” Benjamin felt a wave and anger and revulsion pass through him.

“Yes.” Maria turned and smiled again.

“You murdered my mother and tortured my father.”

“She wouldn’t shut up and he wouldn’t speak.” Maria said dismissively. “She kept telling us to leave and he kept refusing to answer our questions.”

“You fucking bitch.” Benjamin growled.

Benjamin took a step towards the woman, but Garcia press the barrel harder into Benjamin’s forehead. Benjamin forced himself to calm down. He glared at the woman as he spoke.

“How did you know about James?”

“We didn’t actually. We knew he brought you into MI6, but you didn’t leave with him. We tried but couldn’t access your medical records. Someone told Dr. Farris to not trust her network.” Maria waved her finger as if she was scolding a child. “That was very bad of you. We didn’t know how important James was to you until he filed his retirement papers. Imagine our surprise when he listed your pup as his.”

James’ gift to Aislinn brought these killers to them.

“How did you get a flat in his building so quickly?”

“We didn’t. In a day or so, the smell will become much more noticeable and someone will find the previous occupant in her closet upstairs.”

Benjamin wanted to wrap his hands around the woman’s throat. He wanted to squeeze so tight that he crushed her windpipe.

Again, he prayed that Aislinn wouldn’t make a sound.

“Now you will tell us about the firewalls you have placed around the various databases we want access to.” Maria stepped closer again. “Our people have been slowly, inching their way in but haven’t found anything yet.”

“They won’t.” Benjamin said. “It’s a trap.”

His heart began to race. He wondered how long James would be before he returned. What would happen when he walked into his flat to find the two killers there with a gun to Benjamin’s head.

“A trap? What do you mean?”

“The firewalls I developed appear to be very soft. Easy to hack. But if anyone is foolish enough to try, the program will carefully shuttle them into a trap. Once they are in the trap, they won’t be able to get out. It will seize their signal and transmit a virus back along it to their computer. Even if you turn your computer off, when you turn it back on and connect to the internet, the virus will go through. The only way to stop it is to shut down the servers. If you are on a communal server, you can’t stop it.”

Maria lost her smile. Garcia shifted and looked at his sister. Benjamin felt relieved they believed his lie.

“How do we get around it?” she asked.

“You can’t.” Benjamin said. “I’m the only one who can.”

“You will tell me, or we will do to Bond and your baby what we did to Mitchell’s family.”

A wave of nausea passed through Benjamin as he suddenly remembered the photos of the murdered family.

“You will murder us anyway.” Benjamin said. “I won’t help you if you harm my daughter. You won’t get into the databases. Your only hope is to take me with you and let me help you hack the systems myself.”

Maria cocked her head to the side, studying Benjamin. “You would do that?”

“To keep my family safe? Yes. I would do anything, including murder.”

~Q~

Bond hesitated for a moment, on the pavement outside the front door of the building. He looked through the decorative glass that made up the upper portion of the door. He saw no one on the stairs leading up to his flat.

He opened the door and listened. Nothing sounded suspicious. Slowly, he walked up the stairs. His flat was the first door on the right, off of the first-floor landing. He paused by the door and listened. He heard voices. A least three. One was a woman.

Crashing through the door would slow him down and lose his element of surprise. It would probably get Benjamin and Aislinn hurt too. He glanced up and down the stairs. He needed to get them out of the flat and on to the stairs where he could control the situation better. But how could he get them out of the flat?

He glanced up and saw the smoke detector. It was risky, but this was his family.

~Q~

Maria smiled at Benjamin.

“You would murder for them?” She looked him up and down. “Excuse me for say so, but you are not very intimidating.”

“I’ve killed more people than you have. And not elderly couples unable to defend themselves. I’ve probably killed more people than anyone else in MI6. I may not use a gun, but with a push of button and a missile, or a drone, I’ve killed dozens and dozens. I quit counting when I hit fifty. How many have you killed?”

Maria scowled. “There is a difference in killing from a difference and killing face to face.”

“Not to the victims. There are still dead.” Benjamin sounded as cold as the grave. “My world is computers. I work in the ether. I am untouchable and unstoppable. If you want your plan to succeed, you don’t need someone ‘like’ me. You need me.”

“Certain of yourself.” Maria glared.

“Certain as you being told to not kill me.”

“My brother and I can kill you if we want.”

“You are not the boss of this plan. You are only a small player. Someone else is pulling the strings. Someone more intelligent. They’ve told you to collect me. Not kill me.”

“What makes you think that?” she asked.

“The fact I’m still alive. You are waiting for James and Aislinn to return so you can use them as leverage against me. I’m telling you that you don’t need that leverage. Let’s go now and I will help your masters achieve their goals. If you wait for James, you will regret it. He is a Double ‘O’. A licensed assassin. A killer. He will make it his mission to see that every one of you is dead before this is over.”

“He won’t if we have you?” Maria offered.

“He wants Aislinn, not me. If you leave him alone with the baby, then he won’t even think about coming after me.” Benjamin said. “You don’t want him anywhere near you if you threaten his daughter. Trust me on this.”

Maria and Garcia shared a glance, then Maria waved her hand. Garcia lower the gun and grabbed Benjamin by the arm. He pulled him closer to the door. They were just before opening it when the smoke alarm went off. The high pitch whine was jolting. Every muscle in Benjamin’s body tensed as he waited to hear the first wale from his daughter.

“What the fuck?” Garcia hissed.

He pushed Benjamin towards Maria as he glanced through the peephole and out at the landing. He saw nothing but brief wisps of smoke.

“No one’s there.” He growled.

He slowly opened the door and the blare of the alarm was deafening. Benjamin closed his eyes and prayed his daughter would stay asleep. That she wouldn’t wake up and start crying.

When Benjamin smelled the first hints of smoke, he panicked. He stepped back and twisted to run to the bedroom and rescue the girl.

“No, you don’t.” Maria snapped. She grabbed his arm and shoved a gun into his ribs. “Out the door. If there is a fire, it’s just started. We’re safe.” She pushed him towards the door.

Benjamin was terrified. He didn’t want Maria and Garcia to know Aislinn was in the flat, but he didn’t know if James would return in time to save her from a possible fire. They were out on the landing, Garcia had already stepped down two stairs and heading towards the door. Benjamin and Maria were just behind him, when they noticed a shadow suddenly leap over the railing from the landing above and crash down on top of Garcia.

James had lit some flyers from his mailbox, sending a tendril of smoke up to the detector. The lingering scent of burning paper was heavy in the air. He hid behind the banister of the landing above his door and waited for the people to exit.

When he saw Garcia, he leaped at him first. Bond landed hard on the man’s shoulders. Garcia jerked and fired off a round from his 9mm handgun. The bullet crashed through the glass of the front door. Bond reached around Garcia’s body and grabbed the man’s wrist. He yanked the man’s hand down on the wooden rail once, twice, three times before Garcia released the gun. It clattered down the stairs and to the tile floor of the entryway.

Together Bond and Garcia fell down the remain steps to the front door. They rolled into pile, punching and kicking at each other. Bond twisted the other man until he was sitting on Garcia’s chest. Garcia wrapped his hands around Bond’s neck and started to squeeze. Bond fought against the man’s grip. His lungs burned for need of air. Bond’s vision began to grey at the edges. Unable to loosen Garcia’s hands, he grabbed Garcia’s dark hair and pulled the man’s head up off the floor. Then with blinding anger and hatred, he slammed Garcia’s skull into the tile floor over and over again, until the man became slack. Garcia’s hands dropped from Bond’s neck. Bond fell backwards off the man, leaning heavily into the wall as he gasped for air.

As James leaped over the rail and onto Garcia, Benjamin twisted and grabbed Maria’s hand. The woman hissed as Benjamin twisted it. She had to either drop the gun or break her wrist. She dropped the gun but brought her other hand up with her fingers extended to scratch Benjamin’s face. Benjamin saw the darkly painted nails coming at his eyes and took a step back. He grabbed her other hand and struggled as she tried to kick him. They danced across the landing as James and Garcia wrestled at the foot of the stairs.

Bond had taken his third deep breath of air after almost being choked to death when he noticed Benjamin and Maria fighting. Maria was hissing and shouting in Spanish.

“BASTARDO, Hijo de puta!” She spat. “I’m going to kill you!”

Benjamin scowled and suddenly headbutted the woman. She slumped forward and he let her fall. Her head bouncing off the stair rail as she fell.

“Bitch!” Benjamin growled.

He heard James laughing. He looked down to see James sitting on Garcia’s chest. He glared at the alpha.

“Great ‘Glasgow Kiss’.” His alpha said appreciatively.

“The fire?” The smoke alarm still blaring over their heads.

“No fire, just burnt junk mail.”

Benjamin nodded and looked down at the woman laying at his feet. He was overwhelmed with the desire to kick her in the ribs until her unconscious body fell the rest of the way down the stairs.

“I think we need to call Tanner.” Benjamin said.

“I’m sure he is already sending someone over after I hung up on him. Where is Aislinn?”

“Aislinn!” Benjamin twisted and took off running back into the flat.

James struggled to his feet and was right behind Benjamin. The two men found the baby sound asleep in the drawer. Right where Benjamin had left her.

Benjamin gently picked the sleeping baby up and carefully wrapped his arms around her. James slipped his hand around Benjamin’s shoulder while his other hand gently rubbed at the baby’s cheek.

“So, it is decided.” James said softly.

“What is?”

“Where we will live. A house with a garden and no upstairs neighbors.”

Benjamin smiled and leaned into James. “Anywhere you are, will be our home, James.”

“I was thinking the same thing. Anywhere you two are is my home.”

Epilogue

It was very late, pass ten-thirty at night. The executive offices were silent. Most of the staff had left hours ago. Only Mallory and Tanner remained to meet with their visitor. Mallory really didn’t have a choice in the matter, but he was going to make sure that he would receive compensation for the request.

“We have experts who can question these two.” Mallory said as he looked over the top of the folder at his guest.

“Yes, you do, but I wish this to be a thorough interrogation.” Mycroft Holmes said.

“And your brother . . .” Mallory glanced down at the name in the file. “Sherlock is trained in questioning suspects.”

“He is quite gifted in ferreting out information.” Mycroft gave a sardonic smile.

“A talented amateur?”

“A dedicated enthusiast.”

“Dedicated indeed. I know what happened to your parents. I know that Maria and Anthony Garcia murdered you mother. We do not know yet who was ultimately responsible for this. We need a name.” 

“Do not worry, Mallory. I know my brother and I will have acquired all the information for you that you need.”

“And then?”

Mycroft tipped his head slightly to the side. “Then?” he parroted.

“After you get everything out of them that you can – will you be sending them to Belmarsh or will there be bodies we need to collect.”

Mycroft smiled the coldest, deadliest smile Mallory had ever seen.

“Do not worry, M, there won’t be bodies to find.”

Mycroft turned and started to leave. Mallory stood up and address the final question.

“What about your brother – my Quartermaster?”

Mycroft turned back and faced the man. “My brother is on a small holiday with the father of his child. The three of them are safe and sound. Nothing for you to worry about.” Then Mycroft’s smile renewed itself. “Then again, the idea of your most experienced and successful Double ‘O’ and my incredibly intelligent and creative brother together could give one pause.”

“What are you saying?”

“Imagine what will happen when the two of them are working together as a bonded pair.”

Mallory’s stomach dropped.

~Q~

It was too cold now to sit in the garden under the trees. The cottage was warm and snug with the fire in the grates chased any thought of the cold away. Benjamin sat in the same overstuffed chair he preferred when he was here before. It was large and comfortable. He could easily pull his legs up underneath himself and snuggle down under a blanket.

James and Aislinn were playing on the floor in front of the hearth. Aislinn was on her back as James lay next to her. His head propped up in his hand as he looked down at his daughter. He held a small pale green elephant just slightly above her reach. Aislinn smiled as she tried to grab the soft stuffed animal. Laughing and wiggling as each time she almost had it, her father would make a raspberry sound and pull it out of her reach. Finally, James let Aislinn grab hold of the stuff animal. She immediately brought to her mouth and gummed it. James laughed now.

Benjamin watched as the two of them play. Father and daughter. The wood crackled in the fireplace and his hands were warmed by the mug of tea he was holding. He couldn’t imagine anything more perfect than this. Then James and Aislinn turned and looked up at him. Two sets of intense blue eyes watched him. Two broad smiles covered the faces he loved. Then he realized things just got better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ends the story. Thank you all for the wonderful comments and support. I deeply appreciate it. I hope to reading something by you soon. New James Bond movie in six months.


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